What to do?

One of my friends recently told me she had depression. We were walking down a busy street so I couldn't really ask more at the time and since then I haven't known how to, or if to, approach the issue. She said it like a serious issue she was trying to pass off as a weak joke because she also doesn't know how to talk about it. She's very intelligent, strong and proud so I'm awkward about approaching it. She also has a good boyfriend, so if she and he can't help, how can I?

A complication is that a separate (former) friend of mine has recently made up a nasty lie about me. The last time I talked to her was a few weeks before I was told she was spreading stories about me. I'd always known she was quite manipulative and liked getting her way, but brushed it aside. I didn't realise how badly she'd react when I didn't do what she wanted. The problem is that friend number one is quite similar to the one lying about me, including the relationship dynamic, and I guess I'm a bit paranoid now.

Does anyone have any advice on how to approach this? I want to help her, but I don't want to get myself hurt in the process

Thanks in advance for any advice :)


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6 Replies

  • You're right, I am young - in a way I'm pleased it's so obvious. That's great advice, thank you :)

  • Maybe the friend has insecurities and has underlying problems. I would keep a healthy distance, you can listen to her but don't become too embroiled in this so you don't get hurt

  • You may be young...most likely a teen, but you sound like a super nice person!! :) You have been given good advice... you can be polite, but distance yourself from those who give you a 'funny or bad feeling in your gut'... Your intuition is usually spot on. It's ok to 'listen' but don't let your feelings get involved... its really is NOT 'your job' to fix her... maybe you could suggest she speak to her dr. (GP) and he/she might recommend a therapist... Truly...recommend a therapist... This usually makes them react in a way that either you KNOW they are fibbing or exaggerating... or they will listen. Just remember its not up to YOU. Good luck!! Take care.

  • Thank you, I hadn't thought of doing that with the therapist :) I've been trying to listen to my intuition more recently and I really do get a 'bad feeling in my gut' around this, so thank you for the reassurance :)

  • Hi can I ask how old you are please? x

  • Just turned 20 a few weeks ago. Why do you ask?