I'm 23 years old I'm fat I have no fr... - Mental Health Sup...

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I'm 23 years old I'm fat I have no friends and overprotective mom and I want freedom

Sadgirl921 profile image
12 Replies

I'm sad I need advice

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Sadgirl921 profile image
Sadgirl921
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12 Replies
Nathan1993 profile image
Nathan1993

what do you want freedom from?

Sadgirl921 profile image
Sadgirl921 in reply toNathan1993

My mom overprotective

Nathan1993 profile image
Nathan1993 in reply toSadgirl921

loads of mums are over protective it's normal but if she's too over protective then it can be pretty annoying, have you spoke to her about it?

Sadgirl921 profile image
Sadgirl921 in reply toNathan1993

I talked too her about it I feel she doesn't understand me it is annoying

Nathan1993 profile image
Nathan1993 in reply toSadgirl921

it's hard for people to understand where another is coming from if they haven't suffered the same, again, it's a normal thing but I get where you're coming from as it can be rather frustrating, maybe she's being over protective because she sees you're in distress and doesn't quite understand why or what to do so her parental instincts kick in :s

Bridgetlouise profile image
Bridgetlouise

Hi,

Sadly all mums are overprotective and dont like to see their children suffering.

If you feel she is to O.T.T then just tell her, talk it out.

Better than beginning to loathe her :)

What do you mean by freedom?

Freedom to go out?

Freedom to be independant?

Freedom..?

Sadgirl921 profile image
Sadgirl921 in reply toBridgetlouise

Freedom too go out and be independent

Bridgetlouise profile image
Bridgetlouise in reply toSadgirl921

Do you have a job? or savings?

Maybe book yourself a holiday for a few days just to get away, explore and just 'detox' sometimes taking yourself out of the equation helps all parties have a different perspective and builds trust in the relationship.

I know its not easy to do this but believe me, I felt trapped and one day just said enough's enough, and booked a flight to dublin! literally the best decision I made.. Felt so independent, free and made my own decisions. it felt good. Also meant my mum had more trust and respect for me knowing I have adventured out of my comfort zone.

May work for you?

Wintersbite profile image
Wintersbite

Hi sadgirl,

I had an over protective mother aswell as the post's above mention all mum's are protective but some are more than others in my case it was because I was disabled, fat and like you didn't really have friends I made my only real friend in college but my mum was also my friend. If you are like me your mum can't see that the little baby who needed her to take care of her more than normal all these years has finally grown up and needs to have her own life this however don't mean that you won't need your mum you will always need your mum but how I put it to my mum when I wanted to move out was she done such a great job with me and I'm ( back then) in my 20's it's time she has her life back do what she wants to do as she has not only earnt it she deserves it and how I would always need her ( I was giving my mum the kick out speech). I lost my mum 5yrs ago and miss her in so many different ways the advice the laughs and being mum when I needed her to it's not always about protecting it's sometimes thay just can't let you go cause thay love you too much.

I was am an overprotective Dad to my girls,God forbid the person that breaks their hearts, at least I am over protective of two of my daughter's to be honest I did not protect my eldest daughter at all, she lived with her mum and has followed her mums footsteps a drug addicted lady of the night if you get my drift,(the exact reasons I left her mum) your mum is probably like I am Scared ,Scared of what could happen when my boys left for Uni I was happy enough but the girls WOW I was petrified, one is already a Dr the other is still studying to be a lawyer another of my girls decided she did not want anymore edumacating (as she calls it) now 32she has 3children of her own and also has custody of her sister,s son(her sistr is not my child) tbh my daughter Rachael is the one who I feel closer to although you would not notice it ! All parents are at times over protective because the freedom and independence you crave is something we have already had done seen and lived and to be very honest that's what scares us most.Be happy your Mum loves you enough to be like that,if you feel its too much ask her advice tell her you need to be able to live a little ,don't do what my daughter did!"Dad if you don't let me,Well I will have to move out to a place of my own" that was it I had to let her openher wings and fly and just hope her wings did not melt !

Hello Sad-,

You are twenty three years old, are you still at home ?

When it comes to being fat I can sympathize, I am a big bloke with a very unflattering problem, yes I am fat because of the drugs I have to take.

Your GP can script a course of exercise at the health centre and the hospitals now do courses on weight loss. So talk to your GP if you are having problems. Sometimes MAM can cook enough food to feed an army

With regard to your Mother remember She will most probably see you as Her Child and it will be very hard to change that. She will kill with kindness

You are twenty three can you not move out and live your life, you will then be independent

Sorry I cannot be more helpful, my Mother in Law was the same and we just had to be careful and persistent when it comes to portions. Even Hazel my wife hides food with food.

BOB

Mandy6513 profile image
Mandy6513

Your 23...an adult your free to do as you please

People treat us how we allow them

I may be wrong but im assuming your living at home so look into moving out...if your not working then get down to your homeless charity and do some voluntary work.....Its a new year be brave and take life into your hands and go out and grab it

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