OCD depression and valium

[KHaynes]

For years I have struggled with OCD but for a long time now I found I can carry on by taking a valium to numb the pain.

When my husband died two years ago we moved and while I kept busy I was ok

Then we ran out of money to do up the house so I started going away to keep busy visiting friends and relatives

I wore myself out and let some people down badly

For the last six months I have been depressed and avoid any use of Valium

The depression has receeded so has the anxiety but I am left with just me on the sofa

I know I could do more if I used the Valium it dampens my anxiety even just one to get me over the transition of going from indoors to outdoors.

My problem is I think I have always been up and down, unbalanced except now I am more down than up

Not as depressed as I was but no motivation. If I do get motivated and plan things I end up anxious and cancel

Any thoughts any one?

[Photogeek]

Hi there and I can understand what your saying. Unfortunately lack of motivation

Is one of the signs of Depression. I am just wondering are you still being treated

For Depression or on any Meds, might be worth while getting your Doctors

Advice. Avoid avoid avoid Valium at all costs, as it's addictive and can even

Cause Depression.

What helps me to get out of the Slough of inertia is.......

Make a small list of things you want to do or need to do. Try and do even one

Off the list and this alone will spur you on a bit.

Put something nice on the list also, could be Have a nice bath with scented

Oils.

Relax with a good book and slice of cake and cuppa. You alone know what

Is a treat for you.

Here's the thing the more you start doing , the more you will feel like doing. Don't wait

For Motivation, Just do one thing, as Action precedes Motivation.

Hannah x

[KHaynes in reply to Photogeek]

Thank. You Hannah

Exactly what I have been told to avoid the Valium

I used to have lists written and in my head I don't know why they used to motivate me but now they depress me

I did ask the doc if I could increase my meds I take for OCD as they are antidepressants he said yes but I just slept more so I have stopped the extra

I don't feel as bad as I did but maybe you are right I should go back

Also I wonder if I want too much from life I have been in far far worse situations homeless huge debts affairs to name just a few

Now my life is get up wash up do the washing tackle some paperwork that's it!

On some days when people are here things go better

I have a pa I volunteer at the museum I go to bible study twice a week my nephew comes to garden.

The rest of the time I spend mostly in bed

I find it so hard to motivate myself with no one around

I feel so ungrateful I want to do more

When I am really busy I get worn out very easily

You are right maybe I should go back to the dr

Ps I have two lovely tortoises the bigger one even let's me scratch her under the chin she used to just hide

I had them since they were babies

I will play and see if I can post a pic for all my lovely new friends here

But don't get excited I will have to ask my son for help I expect and he is seldom around

K x

[Hidden]

You have been through a lot and sounds to me like your going through mourning for your husband and empty nest syndrome without all your past experiences added to that. Having a family to care for is what life is about for a lot of women so what do they do when thats not there. They have to reinvent and make another one. Staying off the Valium its a nasty drug that hides our feelings and we need them. You are fighting for a life it comes over in your words so go and get it girl

Go back to your doctor ask for couselling and face up to what it is that you try to numb because it will not go away you have to face it and get rid of it.