You Are Not Your Critical Inner Voice

[StressBuster]

All of us are divided in our feelings toward ourselves. The critical inner voice exaggerates and is not connected with reality. Don't take it seriously. It's angry, it's cynical, it's negative, it's pessimistic.

[Findingme]

Sounds like my Dad talking. Is our inner voice just an echo of all the critical, dominating, parental figures we have encountered when we were growing up, and before we developed the ability to discriminate between other peoples views and reality?

[StressBuster in reply to Findingme]

The critical inner voice is your dad talking, your mom talking, your church talking, your traditions talking, your convenience talking, your culture talking, your experts talking.... The list goes on and on! No wonder we fill with self-doubt and a low self-esteem....

[Findingme in reply to StressBuster]

But what about when sometimes the critical voices are right. When a child drops out of school, can I really encourage them to do whatever takes their fancy? I feel I am being soft a lot of the time in an effort not to be like my Dad, but then what if I am letting my child down? How can you say, "You need to buckle down and get some GCSE's" without sounding critical or dominating? Or am I worrying about nothing and all will be fine?

[StressBuster in reply to Findingme]

I guess it's all in degrees—however, if a child drops out of school, there could be other underlying issues. Growing up in a stressful parenting environment, ADHD, being bullied at school, bad grades, suffering from depression, etc. etc. I think it's never good to be hard on anybody—always try and be empathetic. I've struggled with responsibility and accountability because when I was young, I was always rescued by my parents or older siblings.