Ups and Downs


Sometimes I have UPs (more often than not these days) and sometimes downs.

When I have the ups, I feel guilty posting as I struggle not to post something positive, which isn't what the depression forum is about. As opposed to posting a positive comment on someone else's post.

BUT I just want to catch up with my friends ...that's you lot and chew the fat...ewww what a disgusting term.

So I am caught between a rock and hard place, I could 'not post' but that may happen often. I could post with a this post may have the potential to be silly and jolly!! Even worse.

Or live in the shadows an outcast sured up by comedy sketches and chocolate cake.

So how are you, HOW ARE YOU ALL?!


24 Replies

  • I have been having the same thought! Though my issue is im not comfortable talking about my mental health even though its anonymous etc. and with that don't feel i can really give advice to others. I'd like to see lighter posts about anything. what went well that day, what they are finding themselves enjoying again, just no religion or politics!

  • Awe how kind of you to reply and explain. I'm sorry you don't feel easy explaining about your mental health, maybe in time, if it helps. As to the lighter stuff well I agree no religion unless its Dave Allen . His explanation of the Holy Trinity and going to his first School with the nuns had me crying with laughter (on You Tube) and re-runs of Yes Minister are on Radio 4 extra are sooo funny. However thats quite enough of that stuff!

    Good things well on the way to school (part time) they give me a free TimeOut, I came home to find a free radio, I was given cake and perfume recently. The weather has improved, I am drawing again and gaining confidence having gone back to school. I have recently made some new friends very gentle people, artists, which I love and to top it all I get to take mother food shopping today. Oh now look why did you have to mention my mother! It was all going so well.

    Go and watch Indian Summers on 4OD whatever you think of the actors or the story, the visual splendour is breath taking. For sometime now I have been interested in the notion of 'Nostalgia' and how we can be nostalgic for times, places and situations that we never lived in, experienced nor perhaps ever even existed. I'm nostalgic for Hawaii in the 1950s aka the Elvis's film Blue Now has anyone seen my slippers.

    Come on Tokenusername what are you nostalgic for :-)

    In fact anyone else care to share....


  • Thanks for posting Caroline, I can relate strongly to your post. I too am feeling quite well at the moment and consequently feel reluctant to post about how I am feeling for fear of offending others who are struggling. Thinking rationally about this however this should be what the forum is all about. Certainly it should be there for those who are struggling & who are looking for support but also for those who have been to the depths of despair & recovered. Surely it is then up to those who are feeling better to spread some hope & support??? What do others think???

    On that theme, here goes...

    A few months ago I listened to a podcast which explained the UK cycling coach, Dave Brailsford's theory of 'aggregation of marginal benefits'. When he was appointed to his role he realised that there was no single thing which would transform the team into champions. Instead he focussed on improving a number of things by very small margins and the overall effect of changing these many things would be great. On the back of this the speaker on the podcast was saying if we improved a number of areas of our life by very small margins the sum of our efforts would be profound.

    I took this on board & looked at all aspects of my life to see how I could improve each of them. I started to exercise a little more, eat a little better, take vitamin supplements & fish oils, sleep a little more, drink a little less, I bought a SAD lamp for the winter months, signed up to a mindfulness course, joined this forum, contacted friends more often.......The net effect of all of these actions was to drag me out of a very deep depression & get me back to work & functioning. I now have many more good days than bad days. This was a very gradual process & not something I did overnight. All in all it has taken almost 6 months to turn things round & I maintain there is no quick fix to feeling better. It has surprised me however, that once you get a little momentum it is much easier to continue moving forward.

    I would like to say to everyone who is struggling at the moment that there is hope, things will not always be as tough as they feel right now.

    Have a good day.


  • Wow how fantastic :-) Pete, what great advice! I am somewhat hampered by the 'sticky paws' I picked up from Tokenusers post but soon hopefully I will be able to do small measures of course :-)

    Now all I need to do is workout how I can add 'aggregation of marginal benefits' into a sentance, what a great term!

    Thank you SOOO Much for sharing :-)


  • Great post Pete. xx

  • Goodness, I love all of these posts and replies. I, myself am having a very difficult time at the moment and my bad days out number my good by many. But I would still love to hear more posts about everybody's good days, what they did that day that made It good and how they've pulled themselves out of their funks!(not exactly the correct term I know)

    I may only be speaking for myself, but I know that seeing other peoples good mood and progression makes me happy, it gives me hope. Please don't be afraid to post these things.

    Baya x

  • Awe thanks for sharing thats so kind and approving of my post. I really hope you have a better day today, sometimes just being open to looking toward the good can help.

    Or distracting your thoughts from looping by doing something different, moving around the house or if you can going out. I know from your other post you are really trying XX

    Today it is already sunny in London and I get to take the car out :-). Whats so fab about the car is I sing at the top of my lungs when I'm driving... its like Nirvana in a car. If you think of a sunshine song for me and my car let me know XX

  • Unfortunately today is another day I can't face school, or anything outdoors.

    If you are looking for a literal sunshine song then 'pocketful of sunshine' by Natasha Bedingfield is your song, another good one to song at the top of your lungs by her is 'unwritten'. My music taste is very elective and sometimes I find that her music is very empowering!

    Another two (more to my taste) are 'fluorescent adolescence' and 'mardy bum' by the arctic monkeys.

    Hope you and your car enjoy them!


  • I already have the monkeys in the car! Little Monkies but didn't know the Sunshine in your pocket....thank you XX

  • Sorry could leave you without this....

    I dont know how to post videos but I wanted to repay your kindness


  • That is wonderful!!

  • Hi Caroline brilliant , Ah yes comedy and humour is


    Thanks for posting.

    Hannah xx

  • Awe Hannah my friend you always make me smile, thank you xx

  • Ooooh it post the video...WOW fantastic!

  • You post anything you want to chuck! It's great to read positive posts and you always put a big smile on my face. There's no reason we have to be deadly serious all the time is there? You carry on as usual Caroline my love. LOVE YOU BIG KISSY :d

    Bev xx

  • Lovely Bev, I've been watching sketches based on Yorkshire folk its sooo funny 'Chuck', lol

    Pleased you're smiling young Bev...keep it up! Sured up by lots of comedy I am taking La Mer (the mother in French)!

    Up the Revolution!



  • Thank you so much for posting this. It’s so good to hear how others are coping and improving. I’m really struggling to cope at the moment but seeing happy posts from others really helps! I need all the help I can get to motivate myself at the moment.

    I agree that seeing other people’s good mood and progression makes me happy and gives me hope. This really should be what the forum is all about. Please keep it up!

  • Oh You... :-) 'SadAndBlue', so kind, thank you. Hope tomorrow something tickles your funny bone and you end up laughing all day until your tummy hurts!

    Sending a BIG HUG XX

  • Hi Caroline,

    Glad to hear your doing well,

    I'm doing ok, finally applied for a place of my own today or yesterday can't remember when but I'm going to contact the psychologist to see if she can give me a letter to say that by living here it is damaging me mentally which it is and then I might be able to get a move sooner rather than later,

    I got round to sorting out my DVDs turns out I've got over 200 and that's not even including the 70 DVDs I have of stargate sg-1 collection eek think I should stop buying them, but I've started packing things for when I move it's never to early to hope, I have done plenty of job search today and managed to apply for 3 jobs all cleaning jobs and all part time but I know I will be able to do the jobs,

    Got football tomorrow I'm starting to panic about going to it but I'm sure I'll eventually push past the horrible thoughts, but I've got the EEG and MRI scans a week tomorrow so might skip footy for that day but I know that's just not me and I will go and train no matter how tired I feel, because I'm practically spending the whole day in the hospital,

    I suppose my up's are the fact that I've took that first step in moving out and I've sorted out my DVDs and managed to apply for 3 jobs but my down's are I am worried about going to footy and going hospital for the day,

    I can see where you are coming from about not wanting to post something positive as it being a depression forum and it reminds me of a youtube video I saw about a part in a film (I think) and it's basically a lad speaking to a teacher and he says that people don't want to shine because they think they will make people feel inferior but by shining it makes other people realise that they can shine as well and it is like a snowball effect it gives other people the chance to shine, or something on them lines,

    Just tried looking for the link to the video but I can't find it,

    I'm glad your doing well,

    Take care,

    Siobhan xx

  • Thanks as always for sharing Sobhan my friend. Well done on looking to be more independant, I really hope you get your new place and love it. you are so positive Im sure you wll fnd a wonderful home :-)

    Today really is tidy day...arrrgggg. I did tidy then it got all messy again so today is blitz day!

    I love the Shine reference, you are so right when you say

    ' want to shine because they think they will make people feel inferior but by shining it makes other people realise that they can shine as well'

    Never thought of it in that way.

    Good luck with football and well done for keeping up with it despite your worries. Once I have sorted myself out in the next few months I shall get back out on the bike!

    BIG KISS and Thanks again xx

  • I found the quote just on my general mooch round youtube but not the actual video I was on about, the quote that I was talking about is between 0:43 and 1:25/1:30 around them times in the video because it has other quotes which is all good but if you don't want to listen to the whole video then you know when the quote gets said,

    How did you get on with your tidying? even if you only managed to do 1/2 things I still see that as a positive day,

    Oh that's what I'm saving up for a bike, I decided to start saving up odd bits of money at the start of 2014 and I haven't counted my money up yet but might use that for when I move, I hope you manage to get out on your bike even if it's just for a few minutes during the day/week,

    Thank you I am slowly getting over the fears of heading the ball and have headed the ball a few times but just got to make sure I don't head the ball too often otherwise I could end up in hospital again with another concussion but I wear the head guard so feel a little bit safer not much but a little bit,

    Hope your doing well and your day has gone well or as well as you'd hope,

    Big hugs,

    Take care,

    siobhan xx

  • Caroline, so good to hear your doing well. I'm new to the site but hoping it's not all doom and gloom. Hearing about how other people have overcome their depression is great, it shows there is a light at the end of the tunnel. keep on posting and I hope you continue to do well. It's also helpful to hear people are recovering and have their insight into the journey of recovery. While recognising there is no prescription for everyone regarding depression, it is useful and helpful to hear how others have coped and managed. Don't stop posting :) I think this should be the new FB :)!x

  • Oh thanks, well you know as it says Uppy Downy but more Uppy at the moment...I know I'm oh so eloquent

    Cheers x

  • hi caroline you dont have to post positive thoughts all the time we would all love to be positive all the time but the nature of depression means we cant all the time thats were groups like these come into there own were like minded people try to help each other and are there when you need a helping hand or to help someone who needs it ! take care caroline ! david x

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