looking at another post i would love to see other peoples self-affirmations, not the happy-clappy kind, but the sort that are BELIEVABLE even when you feel rubbish, Eg my fall-back is "This too shall pass", although i realise that not everyone will find this one believable either
I can read the standard affirmations and just find they make me believe the total opposite.,
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gardengnome
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I completely agree with you gardengnome and have read in many places the very same point; that for people who are depressed reading positive affirmations make them feel worse as positive affirmations only work for people already in a positive frame of mind to boost their confidence further.
Your favourite phrase is me too or very similar in that I say "Everything passes". This can work for me because I do know that my moods change very much according to the days of the week; so I can actually say to myself
something like "On Monday you will feel better; hang on a get through to Monday". This only works in that very specific respect because of my particular pyschology and all the problems I have with weekend, bank holidays and all my connotations/expectations of those.
If I'm feeling suicidal a good one for me is the "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" ; again it works for the same reasons as the intensity of a crisis for me will not be continuous for more than 3 days as generally there will be something which I know can "rescue" me from that in the future. So if I'm feeling suicidal today I may think well I'm seeing the psychiatrist next week or I'm seeing a counsellor next week; and that could stop me. Again that is due to my pyschology and the fear of being unconnnected.Knowing I have an appointment makes me feel like there is someone there and I am not entirely unconnected or alone.
I think a positive one for depressed people is the book title "Depression the curse of the strong" as so much of depression seems to be about self blame and this very title removes the blame.
Another one "You've got through so far. You've managed so far. You can manage again".
Interesting post thank you for that. Mine is - this sounds familiar and have been through it before so know how to deal with it. Just do as I did last time and it will pass. xx
Ooh I'm going to try this today as I've been feeling very overwhelmed with life
Ten minutes at a time sounds so much more manageable than trying to think my whole life ahead .. & whatever will be will be anyway to a degree whether I worry or not
Thankyou for this advice as it's really helping me to stay calm & a bit more optimistic today
Agreed. I said this to CBT counsellor on Friday. I don't believe the affirmations so what is the point of saying them. She said try acceptance. So 'I accept this.......' Rather than positive affirmations.
Interesting post. Yes, some of them I believe like that and I think they are spot on, sometimes I think they only apply to certain cases. Anyway, one of the things I think we could consider is this: 'it usually isn't as bad as you think it's going to be' 9 out of 10 times this seems to be case, the waiting, or the thought, is worse. And even when it has been as bad as you think or worse, and nothing has prepared you for it, somehow you got through, so well done you - alright you may be shaking your head right now, thinking, 'yeah but at what cost?'. But look at us all, we're all still here. And there will always be SOMETHING positive to take from it - even if it isn't always obvious. 'Every cloud has a silver lining'.
My other one is a slight modification on 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger' - I don't think that's always the case, but I do think it makes you a better, wiser person. More compassionate and understanding.
My final quote is: 'you never know what's around the corner' - because you don't. Anyone of us could be on the edge of experiencing something amazing.
I really love all of these Funkyfairy and they are so true. So often I work myself up imagining what might happen ( in some ways this is preparation and some of the things I imagine could happen COULD well happen and I need to be prepared) On the other hand quite often those circumstances do not come to pass and I need to remember this; so it is getting a balance. So true that you never know what is round the corner. You never know how your fate could change. You could go somewhere and meet someone who could become special
to you. How do we know? This is why I carry on as we cannot know what the future holds.
Also when getting over a relationship here is a good one. You did not know that person two years ago and you were ok before you met them and will be ok after it is finished with them. Sometimes I think we feel we NEED a relationship to survive. Whilst it would be nice to find the right person we do infact carry on by ourselves and we do survive without them, even though we would LIKE one if you see what i mean?? If it is meant to be then it WILL be is another one. You cannot make something work beyond a certain point of honest effort; beyond all of that maybe it was never meant but there will be something/someone that is.
"Not my circus, not my monkeys" - been saying that a lot in the last few days. Done my best to complete handover process , but I can't help it if my organisation decides to terminate my post and then not re-fill it for another few months.
First, a funny one but can be true :- "Before you diagnose yourself with anxiety, depression, or low self esteem, just make sure you're not surrounded by a load of a...holes!!!"
"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying "I will try again tomorrow".
One for myself and a few others "Surrender the need to please everyone. It just won't happen. It's your job to like yourself". ( Judy Orlaff )
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