I'm tired with my life

[sandy497]

The more you grow with your age more the responsiblities more the tension. Feeling loneliness wonder how do married people handle life as I'm bachelor feel life has been messed up. I alone should battle out everything no regrets though.

[Hidden]

Hi,

Well... I'm on my third marriage and it is far from ideal but I do find that even though things are definitely imperfect and at times intensely irritating and frustrating, I also find there are some lovely times and that overall it is nicer to share life than not - simple things like calling out to someone when I arrive home, sharing the burdensome problems, showing someone plants I've bought, having a hug sometimes, finding my husband suddenly makes me laugh or that despite some minor irritation I suddenly feel an inexplicable warmth and affection. Whenever I'm feeling annoyed or lonely or neglected, which is quite often, I feel how stupid I was to have married when I'd said never again, and that if I am ever on my own again I will never marry again - but despite that I know I will choose to live with a partner because I think it's sad not to have anyone to share life with. I know some people are happy with their lives that way but I feel it is sad as although the people I know who have not re-married and live alone seem happier they also seem cut off from something that I value in myself - I suppose I would call it tenderness and the ability to feel compassion at a really intimate level, a softness that comes from adapting to another person and accepting them as they are - and finding they accept me the way I am too.

Thinking the way I dohas come about as a result of knowing myself through lengthy therapy and it is only now having had all that experience that I can answer the way I have and know I really mean it!

How do you feel your life has been messed up, that sounds quite fatalistic as if there is nothing you can do to change things whereas there is always some way of overcoming problems - except terminal illness or starvation levels of poverty.

You say you alone SHOULD battle everything out - I wonder when you learned to think like that about life?

Suex

[Holly101]

Hi Sandy,

No, life isn't easy.. You're saying you wonder how married people handle life, do you think they find it easier or harder?

On the one hand they've got someone to share their life and their problems with, but on the other they always have to take the other person into account, their feelings, their needs, their wants..

I'm single too, and although I do sometimes miss that companionship, I'm glad and happy that I'm free and independent, and can do what I want when I want!

As for life's problems and responsibilities, everybody's got them, single, married, divorced, etc., and we'll just

have to deal with them and cope with them in our own ways..

Don't be tired with your life Sandy, who knows what's yet to come, and didn't you say you'd no regrets?

Carpe Diem, and make the most of each day..

Luv, Holly Xx