Can someone give me some tips on how to live alone please?the last time I tried I made an attempt on my life and ended up in a coma.I?

[serendipity7]

I have schizoaffective disorder and am recovering from a stroke and feel like I need to start living on my own again but I am afraid.

[Hidden]

I have lived on my own most of my life. My top tips are

1) Try and make sure you have a network of friends around you

2) Go out everyday even if it's just to the shops if you need company

3) I play darts so I belong to 2 teams. If you have a hobby/interest follow it.

4) It's an old clique but join a class or something to give more focus to your life

5. I don't know your age or if you are working but if you are older there should be a local centre near you which you can join. I joined mine and go 3 times a week to play euche (a card game), scrabble and I belong to the writers group.

Finally there should be drop in centres near you for people with mental health issues so it could be helpful to go. Make sure you have the number of the out of hours mental health team so you can call if you are feeling bad. You can also call or email the samaritans.

I'm sure others with be in soon with more ideas. x

[serendipity7 in reply to Hidden]

Thank u. I Will try a yoga class.

[Photogeek in reply to serendipity7]

Hi Serendipity .

Get a hobby.

Put on the radio when you wake up.

Get a pet if you can

Go to a coffee shop for a change.

Volunteer once a week .

Invite someone in for a coffee and chat

Join a library

Take a class

Go to gym or have a swim.

Hannah

[serendipity7 in reply to Photogeek]

Thank you Hannah, good tips!

[gardengnome]

i remember moving into my own house years ago, i sat on the stairs and went Oh My God!!!! I think it helps being prepared and organized well before the move. I already knew i was ok to afford the bills, so that side was o.k.

I think packing and organizing your belongings well is key, i still have some decorations that i never found a place for, i am a cluttered messy type of person, and am still trying to organize the house, if i had had a clutter-free organized start i think i would have found the move easier and less stressful.

have a plan / routine for getting out of the flat, if it is a small place for a single person, you are bound to go stir-crazy anyway.

organize social time, whether it is going to an exercise class, visiting family, the local park, window-shopping, time at the local library, or just anything that gets you out of just being inside your head.

Try not to change too many things at once so that there is some stability for you.

i often have the radio or t.v. going in the background, esp when i am eating, guess it is a kind of substitute for company. Good luck, if you have a choice, look carefully at where you will be moving to, spend some time in the area, is it somewhere you would feel comfortable and safe living? will it be close to the bus / park / is it easy to get to the shops? Will the place be warm enough, anywhere to dry the washing? Yes i know this is general stuff, but if the basics are not right, then your mood will be mucked-up . try to give yourself the best chance to start off right in a comfortable place, it is probably better to take a little time looking, and getting it right, to give yourself a bit of peace of mind.

[serendipity7 in reply to gardengnome]

Good advice.there is a library next to a lake across the street and busses only two blocks away.I feel better now.

[Hidden]

Try to accept every thing that's happened to you so far in your life, & put it all behind you & try to move on wards & forwards always..I could list 2 dozen things that could/might help you, but i know one thing that will definitely help you if you can learn it..Mindfulness + emotions/feelings control practice/training if learn't, would mean no more unwanted feelings of loneliness/sadness/depression etc..Those are i suppose the main one's that people who live alone feel the most, but they don't realize their creating them themselves by how they think..It's the same with fear what do you fear about trying again?, you say you tried to commit suicide the last time but what has that got to do with the next time?..Your'l be amazed at what you don't know about your own mind just as i was, & seeing as how your gonna have a lot of free time due to recovering from a stroke..This is the most amazing thing you could ever learn about, so why not give it a go.

[serendipity7 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I will research mindfulness and try to remember that I do have some control

[Hidden in reply to serendipity7]

A really good vid that I'm sharing on various sites is: "Eckhart Tolle anxiety and fear", & it's on utube..I think my last comment was a bit too blunt, & i really do apologize for that..So when i said what do you fear about the next time you live alone, i only mean't it to show you that you shouldn't/can't judge your future by your past..So if you watch the vid & it should be 17.05 mins long, (just to make sure you watch the right one), i think you might find it very interesting..If you do find it interesting i think once you get into it your'l find it truly fascinating..Feel free to ask me anything on the subject, because Iv'e been doing the practice/training for the last 8 months or so.

[Photogeek]

Hi there sorry I didn't realise you were recovering from a stroke so some of things

I said might not be suitable. But is there any Post stroke association you could join.

Take a short walk even alone and build up bit by bit. If you don't mind me asking where

Did you live until now? And that might enable me to give you more advice and can you get around at all? Do you have any family help or support? Please let me know and

I will get back to you later.

Hannah

[serendipity7 in reply to Photogeek]

Thank you

[Hidden]

Hi don't forget the golden rules when moving into a new place. Once you are in unpack the kettle, microwave , the tv and your bedding. Then leave it all and go down the pub and get rat a...... Always works for me xx

[serendipity7 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you

[serendipity7]

Thank you everyone

[Hidden]

Organise a structure to your week with things to do every other day at least, especially weekend days. Even jobs like go to the bank or supermarket can be diaried so there is a task for each day that gets you out and about. Also can you join one of the local organisations such as Mind and see whether they can provide a befriender? Also of course use this website every day! I do hope it goes well for you. Suexx

[Gambit62]

Do you really mean that you want to live on your own or are you talking about living more independently?

Actually I think talking about living independently is probably wrong because we are all interdependent. What most people really want is to live less dependently.

I presume that you have carers and support from social services. May be the best thing to do would be to talk about how you are feeling and work with them to come up with ways of helping you to feel you are doing more for yourself and being less dependent, rather than jumping to the other extreme.

Even if you are living on your own that doesn't have to mean that you are on your own. Keep up and build up contact with other people, and, as Sue says, try to build a structure into your life that ensures you do get contact with other people.

[trekster22]

mind.org.uk/information-sup...