Is there anyone live life in a numb condition ?

[Nienie]

something like you can't say she is optimistic or pessimistic ,she just don't like to talk more and prefer to keep silent ,when griefs come ,she has no tears ,just smile and tell herself she has nothing to do but to face .... something like live in her own world ...

[Gambit62]

There are times when I get to the point where all the emotions shut down and I can't feel anything and communicating with other people is impossible. I sometimes refer to it as going monosyllabic because the communication just does get so difficult and I can't manage more than one short word at a time.

I recently heard someone trying to explain what depression was like to a group of school children and talking about how people's mood changes - goes up when something good happens, goes down when something bad happens ... unless you're depressed in which case it just stays completely flat, whatever happens.

[Nienie]

something like that ,all emotions shut down ,I am just a short temper, rushed and get pissed off less then 3 sentences .....

[gardengnome]

numb times sometimes worse than any blue times, at least when I'm depressed/angry there is something to argue against, I can try to challenge the thoughts/emotions that are dragging me down. but when I'm numb there is nothing to get a handle on, nothing solid to fight against. Just lost naming colours and counting in my head in place of thinking/feeling. Then the demands of the daily routine and work slowly help to engage the thinking feeling part of my brain, oddly it's only when I start to feel moody again that I know I am on my way back to reality and will climb back up to what passes for normality.

[Nienie in reply to gardengnome]

i think you have that kind of feeling before ,in reality ,I thought if that is really worse than blue times ,but I just can't and quit the idea try to do any efforts ,near to psycho ....

[Hidden]

Hi, that sounds like I used to feel for very many years, numb and half alive. I sought therapy, it was difficult and painful but now I FEEL and feel real. Do ask your GP to refer you - you don't have to go into details, just tell him or her that you need to see someone to talk through some difficulties that you bring with you from the past and that you would prefer not to talk with him about them but would like to be referred to a specialist psychotherapy service as they will have experience in working with people who feel cut off from feelings in the way you describe. It's better to go to the right place first time rather than have a bit of counselling and a bit of CBT only to find you feel worse again, because that way your despair will become deeper. If you want to find a local NHS psychotherapy service you can google your area and NHS mental health services, then secondary services. Probably you will have to be assessed via the local CMHT but if you write down how you feel - and don't feel - before you go for the assessment it will not be too difficult. Do seek help, feeling cut off from feelings is not a life, it's a living death. I remember what it was like and thank God to be out of that state. However bad I feel now, at least I feel alive! Suexxx

[Hidden]

Hi I feel numb nearly all of the time, sorry I don't know if I can help you I don't know what I could write to help you see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't want to laugh or cry, don't want to talk or sing, don't want to get up in the mornings yet I don't want to go to sleep at night. I've had depression nearly all of my adult life don't really know much of anything else. In the last 10 years I don't think I've been out of my house more than 250 times. I've had an account with Health Unlocked for about a year now and it's only the second time I've wrote a response I've wanted to write so many and just couldn't do it and I don't know why, I do remember many years ago that I feared people would think that I'm not all that bright because my spelling wasn't that clever or I'd couldn't write down wot I wanted to because I couldn't spell the words so I'd think of smaller words that meant near or enough the same thing which then made wot I was trying to say sound childlike, I tried to look for the words up in a dictionary but it would have taken me a week to write a response. I don't know what l'm trying to tell you and that's because I don't know who I am, I feel nothing at all I really don't. So now I just go through the motions now just enough to keep me going. So sorry that I've gone on quite alot just needed to write this down and when I seen your question the word numb stuck out a mile and I knew I just had to write this down. So thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading wot i've wrote.

[gardengnome in reply to Hidden]

first off your own life time of wrestling with depression makes any experience/advice that you yourself could offer as valuable as anyones could be, please don't be afraid of judgements over petty mis-spellings on this site, I don't think samuel jonhson quite knew what a nightmare he was unleashing when his dictionary got published. Your meaning in the posting was crystal clear and I would say ignore the annoying red lines that spell check come up with when typing and please do add any support you can on this site. A