Unable to have Sex

[UnableToDoSex]

Hello friends,

I am 29yrs old. I got married around a year ago. I was virgin before marriage.

I used to masturbate a lot. Sex used to be on my mind almost all day. I could never have sex because I didn't have any girl friend.

I got married. On my honeymoon we couldn't have sex as I found out that penetration is not that easy!

After few days we came to know that I have phimosis.

My wife had been doing sex since 10 years or so. She was surprised that why I am not able to penetrate. The moment I used to penetrate after putting a condom, my dick used to start loosen up.

I was very upset with this and so was my wife.

I went to few sexologists. They said its all psychological. They also gave me viagra. I took it and had very strong and long lasting erection. I couldn't ejaculate though. I thought its because phimosis.

Then there came a period of two weeks when we were on a foreign tour.There we had sex! and I ejaculated too. Frequency was around 6 times in 2 weeks. But there is a catch. I had to think about some fantasy and this fantasy in my mind was the cause of erection. I was getting erection during foreplay but then again..just before penetration I had to run a fantasy in my mind(with some movie actress) which helped me in maintaining erection and ejaculating.

Then I had my circumcision. After recovery, the problem is still there. Now, a lot of times, I am not able to think about something erotic properly and this causes my dick to become loose at the time of penetration.

As far as my wife is concerned, She does a lot of things like handjob,blowjob, stripping and what not. She has an excellent figure as well. But even when she does all these things, I have to think about some fantasy to ejaculate(bj and hj)

I am really worried with all this.

Just don't know what to do.

Am I impotent?

Then I again think that since she is my wife so there is no excitement with her in my mind. But then what to do?

This is making me very depressed.

Please suggest guys.

Thanks.

[Hidden]

Did your wife try oral on your glans ?

[UnableToDoSex in reply to Hidden]

yes..It makes me hard immediately. But then when I go for penetration.. it becomes loose( If i dont think something erotic)

[Hidden in reply to UnableToDoSex]

It's not abnormal to fantasize.You think and get things done. A long foreplay can be a solution. Hope you will slowly get accustomed with your wife

[UnableToDoSex in reply to Hidden]

hmm thanks a lot. but, its not always possible to fantasize. I will try to make foreplay long.

[Hidden]

Foreplay from both sides is necessary

[UnableToDoSex in reply to Hidden]

yes. She is very active on this

[Hidden in reply to UnableToDoSex]

you are fortunate . can see blue films jointly . In internet there are lot of sites . I prefer to see danejones.com. Hope you will recover

[UnableToDoSex in reply to Hidden]

no she is not into this

[UnableToDoSex]

Thanks a lot.

[jaglad]

You have a lot going on there, firstly your wife is doing all the right things so make sure you repay the compliment. Doing things for and to her will keep her interest but also may help you, it not all about penetration. Viagra or similar is good to use occasionally but I only use it on 'special' occasions, I do know some men who use it very regularly even though they do not really need it. Do not become reliant on it.

Nick from Italy has written on here about 'soft penetration' and it is worth looking up. I have tried it and it is possible.

If your wife craves penetration try using some sort of sex aid, occasionally I use what is basically a padded condom. This can be put on when you are not erect and inserted as normal, just use lube.

Most importantly do not become obsessed by this, it will make it worse. Relax and let nature take it's course.

[UnableToDoSex in reply to jaglad]

thanks a lot!