41 years old with phimosis all my life

[Bburn]

Hi, I am 41 years old, I have 2 wonderful kids and amazing wife. I've had phimosis all of my life or as long as i can remember and I've never suffered any infections or had any sexual issues at all. I recently went to the doctors for another issue, he noticed that around the tip of my foreskin, there are white patches of skin, which I mentioned it has always had that appearance and has never been an issue. I am waiting to see a Urologist as my doctor has recommended that I may need a circumcision as the skin could be precancerous, that freaked me out and now I'm worried about having to have a circumcision, I'm scared of what my glans will look like.

[FredFlinstone]

It is best to get the circumcision and not worry about the phimosis or cancer in the future.

Once it is done and you are healed, you will wonder why you did not get done sooner.

I had a mild case of phimosis of and on when I was your age, and it didn't seem to be getting better with age.

Once I had the snip, and was fully healed, it was a game changer.

Your glans will dry a little and toughen up a little, and it will get a little bigger too.

Sex is also amazing as it takes a little longer, so it is much stronger.

[Bburn in reply to FredFlinstone]

Thank you so much for your reply, I've been down since seeing my doctor and waiting to see my Urologist. I think it is more embarrassment than anything, but I shouldn't be, my wife has been amazing and supportive. I do worry about post op with the pain and freaking out with the way it looks, but time is a healer, I do seem to have a high pain threshold so hopefully that gets me through the first 2 days from the sounds of it.

[FredFlinstone in reply to Bburn]

Don't let people freak you out about the pain.

I felt very little pain after the procedure. It was more an irritation from rubbing inside my underwear. that goes away after a few weeks. Just take it easy at first while things heal.

Coconut oil does wonders in the healing journey.

[Norwich1 Moderator in reply to Bburn]

if the urologist advises a circumcision to avoid penile cancer then please follow that advice. You can read on here the experiences of many men post circumcision. If you are going down that route, ask for your surgeon’s advice on post-op care and what to do if you are worried about anything post-op - number to call etc. You have heard above one member’s experience of sex after circumcision but remember that it will not be like that for all men!

[Bburn in reply to Norwich1]

Thank you so much, I appreciate your advice. I will 100% go with what the Urologist recommends.

[GreatBallsOfFire in reply to FredFlinstone]

I 1000% Agree with this response , The only thing I did wrong was put it off . Now that it’s done i’m still recovering ( 6 Months ) but fully functional and have absolutely ZERO regrets . Yeah it’s scary and tender but the future is wort the shirt term discomfort !!

[Deeart22]

From someone who was where you are over a year ago, all I can say is get the circumcison! My surgery was last Jan 2023 and I had the same concerns as you are having now!!

A year on...... I wish I hadn't put it off and had the procedure back in 2022 when I was supposed to. It took about 6months to fully heal and I haven't looked back since!

[Bburn in reply to Deeart22]

How long did you have to wait until you could have sex. Is it normal to feel scared about the procedure, I think I might be worrying too much as I believe the actual procedure is straightforward

[Deeart22 in reply to Bburn]

It's really straightforward, the general anaesthetic means you don't have to endure the procedure. They make you passtburine before you leave which was a crazy 1st experience!! I couldn't control where it went and soaked the bathroom. You will have to learn to squat until the swelling decreases 🫣

In terms of sex, I think they said three weeks but I found it wasn't comfortable and didn't quite feel right for the first 5 weeks. I started with masturbation just to get used to how it works again and the first time took ages! The first intercorce session wasn't quite right it was still a bit numb and as much as I rushed it, I felt I should have waited.

One key bits of advice is to make sure you rest!!!! No gym, no lifting, very light work. I went back to work too early and got an infection and it swelled to a bolder!!!!!

Just take your time and don't stress it. The procedure is a distant memory now and the benefits well out way the feeling or soreness beforehand.

Good luck 🤞👌

[Limsathya]

I had circumcism 22 days ago. Pain might vary for different people, I didn't feel pain at all, I felt a little discomfort and very sensitive due to new exposed glance. But with time, I feel better about it. I cannot judge the beauty look of my penis yet, since it is in the process of healing. Everyone said it will be fine. Please do not worry about pain.

[WgH420]

If you choose to go ahead, you’ve stumbled upon the most supporting network of people with similar experiences here. This forum has changed my life. ❤️

[lgoddard]

I put off circumcision as I was quite concerned about what would happen but after dealing with phimosis/balanitis for many years I ended up getting circumcised and it's fixed both of those issues, my urologist referred to the white skin as scar tissue and said that once the skin has that it will never heal and needed to be removed(circumcised). He also talked to me about the dangers of not getting circumcised and how it would increase my chances of penile cancer or potential paraphimosis. He said if I got severe paraphimosis that I would probably have to go to the hospital and have an emergency dorsal slit to quickly fix the issue and end up having to get circumcised anyway, I'm happy I got the surgery and my urologist made the correct decision and fixed my medical issues.

[Bburn in reply to lgoddard]

Thank you so much for your reply and explanation, I've never suffered with balantis, but I think you are correct and should bite the bullet and get a circumcision.

[Kidpoke]

I’m 2 weeks post op and believe you me I was just as scared as you was getting it done and how you’re thinking. I won’t lie to you the first couple days are the worse of course with the rubbing which just takes time getting used to it, just apply loads of Vaseline on that helps. You won’t feel nothing during the procedure, it’s a 30 min op quick and easy and won’t feel a thing. Your sex life will improve so I’ve heard and so will your hygiene with keeping it clean. Now I’ve got it done I can honestly say it’s the best thing I’ve ever done.. you’ll be wondering why you haven’t done it all these years ago. Good luck and please get it done

[Bburn in reply to Kidpoke]

Thank you so much

[Gally1975]

I had exactly what you now have and I kept putting it off until eventually I went to the Doctor. I went to him on a Monday and had the operation on the Thursday it was that serious. I'm now 6 weeks and while at the start it looked awful now it looks unreal to be honest. Trust me on this after the operation you won't look back. You ll be saying should have done this ages ago. Plus the wife loves the new look. Best of luck.

[Bburn in reply to Gally1975]

Can I just ask, before you had the cut, did your penis ever seem to swell after ejaculation, apologies for the type of question. Seems to take a while for for penis to return to normal flaccid state.

[Gally1975 in reply to Bburn]

Hi. No problem. Yes and went I went to the toilet the head was ready to burst out. My foreskin was white at the top and it didn't move at all. The relief when I had my surgery was immense from day 1. Also you can ask me anything you want.

[Bburn in reply to Gally1975]

I really appreciate that, my head has been all over the place, my phimosis never used to cause me any issues, I don't know why suddenly it has. I'm currently trying to speed up my referral to see the Urologist.

[Bburn in reply to Gally1975]

Sorry to bother you again, so from my original message, having phimosis for my whole life, I'm just a bit concerned what colour my glans will be and if they will look right, because I've never been able to retract my foreskin, will the Urologist find something wrong after circumcision, or will my glans change colour over time and look normal as they open and free.

[AsianGuy in reply to Bburn]

I have a little curiosity that you said you had never retracted your foreskin. May I ask how your sexual life happened before. Did you ever find anything difference?

[Bburn in reply to AsianGuy]

I have had a perfectly normal sex life, my phimosis had never caused me any issues at all, it's only recently that I went to my doctors because I had some inflammation around my urethal opening and he noticed the white patches on my foreskin. I never suffered any pain, only recently things have changed and I don't know why, I've done a urine sample and blood tests and no infection found.

[Bburn]

Thank you so much, I appreciate your comment.

[Saravin]

I had a circumcision under very similar circumstances back in December - one slight difference in that I will say I had always found certain things a little uncomfortable sex-wise - but otherwise could’ve written the same as your post. I’m a few years older than you and was also very apprehensive about it.

Four months on, I’m 100% certain it was the right thing to do, and do wish I’d had it done years ago. I no longer worry about it and, unexpectedly , I also prefer how it looks and feels.

I had mine done under local anaesthetic - the procedure was uncomfortable at times but genuinely no pain at all afterwards. A few issues in recovery - initial crazy hyper sensitivity of the glans and issues with urine going everywhere - but by six weeks on it was all good and I was enjoying sex again.

Obviously everyone’s case is different and I know there are horror stories about (I read plenty!) but I suspect my circumstances are quite normal and hope this is some reassurance if you choose to go ahead.

[Bburn in reply to Saravin]

Hi Saravin, my only worry is what colour (white) will my glans be as obviously they have never been exposed, I'm worried that they will look abnormal or will the colour come back over time once they are exposed, the small bit of my glans I can see look to be reddish-purple. Did you have any issues with your urethal opening before your circumcision, it looks like I have some scar tissue that has formed, probably from irritation from my phimosis, making it smaller, although it's not causing me any issues

[Saravin in reply to Bburn]

For me, the opening often got a little red and sore before (not a lot, but it was noticeable and when I was examined twice before having the op the doctors pointed out it looked sore). This hasn’t happened since the op and I figure it’s because the area is kept drier and, effectively, cleaner. I would think it’s likely to be beneficial with the issues you refer to.

As for the colour, I don’t know if mine has settled yet to how it will be in the long term but I was worried it would look a little patchy and whitened and yet it’s all good - one colour and looks how it should as far as I’m concerned. Yours may be different but what I will say is I found it hard to imagine before the op, then once it had started to heal well it quickly just began to look and feel like ‘me’ and not something I worried about at all.

[Bburn in reply to Saravin]

Thank you so much, I really appreciate your feedback, I'm still waiting to see my Urologist, just wish I could fast forward and for it all to be over.

[Saravin in reply to Bburn]

No problem and try not to worry…I’m sure you’ll be fine and probably end up really glad you had it done if you go ahead. Good luck.

[Bburn]

Thank you so much for your message.

[BexyBoy]

I can understand anticipating what might happen if you have a circumcision, but surely, no skin removal should be done before a biopsy to test whether the problem is cancer?

[MrMac99]

Hey sorry to hear that you are having problems with your foreskin if you are unable retract and wash under the foreskin it's important to get checked out with the urologist especially if you have some white area around the tip of the glans. its possible you have a underlying condition like LS or pre cancerous? but if you have had it all you life it could just be phimosis so don't jump into all the conclusions first just get it checked out. Don't worry about the embarrassment of it all ether your just another guy coming to have his junk look at.

[Bburn in reply to MrMac99]

That's my worry, I really don't want it to be LS, when I saw my doctor he put down on my referral notes that it's minor, as I've pretty much lived all my life with phimosis. So fingers crossed it's just phimosis and nothing else.

[MrMac99 in reply to Bburn]

Yeah exactly fingers crossed it's not anything else just phimosis 🤞I can't imagine how you have lived for so long with phimosis have you ever had it looked at before with the GP and have you tried steroids or stretching.I think you probably need to consider having the circumcision when you see the urologist they probably will recommend it in your case.

[Bburn in reply to MrMac99]

Ive never had it looked at before as it has never caused me a single problem, I've never had an infection around that area so I've just carried on as normal. I went to the doctors as my urethal opening looked as though it was blood shocked, that's when he noticed my foreskin and said I should get it checked. They took a urine sample and blood tests to check for infection, everything came back clear. I'm pretty much certain that the Urologist will recommend a circumcision, if so, I will go with what he says. When I have read up on LS I don't seem to have all the symptoms of that.

[MrMac99 in reply to Bburn]

You were lucky so to get away for so long with out any problems has the urethra cleared up now? What did the GP think do you have any discolored skin around the tip of the foreskin?I suppose phimosis is one symptom of LS but you have had it for so long it's unlikely unless you have more symptoms.

[Bburn in reply to MrMac99]

Yeah my uretha has cleared up fine, my doctor has put down he suspects it's leukoplakia of the foreskin, my head has been in absolute bits, I feel fit and healthy, I've spoken to my doctors to speed up my referral, but didn't get anywhere. I can't seem to stop thinking about worse case scenario, which is the dreaded 'C' word, but I suppose I my doctor suspected that then he would have got me seen sooner. I might just be over thinking things.

[MrMac99]

That's great it has cleared up. The leukoplakia doses sound very similar to LS or scaring of the foreskin it's very difficult to distinguish between these conditions. so try not to worry I know it can take over your life with you thinking about it all the time that's normal we all do it. Everything will be sorted in the end. Are you going private or on the public health system?

[Bburn in reply to MrMac99]

Just on the public health system so could take a while until its sorted