Lack of motivation

[SLE-Warrior]

Hi Everyone

I hope we are taking care of ourselves and doing well.

I have been in a weird space for a while. I have tried get out of it has been hard. I may be depressed but I never been offical diagnosed. My health is still up and down especially my mobility and pain management. Trying to get a part time job which has been hard because of covid. I am volunteering am not enjoying has I used. It gave me something to do during the week.

I want to get out feeling hopeless and not feeling motivated. Any books or advice anyone can give will be appreciated.

[PMRpro]

The first piece of advice is to speak to your GP if you can. Chronic illness itself does come linked to poor mood. Many people are struggling with mental health problems as a result of Covid and isolation and the problems associated with working as a a result. So you have a multiple whammy - no wonder you are feeling hopeless.

If your GP can't/won't take time for a f2f talk (although phone calls aren't too bad here) then online may be able to substitute. If you are in the UK, the NHS has suggestions:

nhs.uk/using-the-nhs/nhs-se...

If you google mental health services and where you live you should get some information

[miccika1]

A combination of two things helped me. It had to be done both at the same time. One is behavioral cognizant therapy with a person specialized in people w chronic health issues and the second was an antidepressants. Cymbalta worked for me but different people respond to different ones. Good luck. I personally dont believe you can get out of such state just by reading self help books.

[Hidden]

On the dark days I need to do something that gives me a sense of achievement to help lift me out, but sometimes it's so dark my bank account of motivation is in the red so impossible. However I have found something that helps me at those times. I phoned my local flower shop and said I have £20 and I am in a low patch (no more detail than that) and need some colour around me. So could you deliver a mixture of flowers. I have found 5 tiny vases and a big one. It's not a lot of money but I can break some stems into many bits and add greenery from home. They were wonderful and it took me most of the day working out how to spread them out and where to put them. It was so uplifting. I am now a regular customer and they deliver. I can usually only afford it once a month but for me it's so worth it. They know I don't want a fancy made up bunch but a good mixture to play with. Sometimes it helps me get some motivation but even if it doesn't it's lovely to look at. Some of my best looking ones only have one flower in 😊

[Singing_fairy]

I’m sorry you are feeling low at the moment. To be honest I think we all are, whether we suffer with chronic illness or not. Life has been abruptly turned on it’s head. All of my children (16,15,10,6) are all struggling with covid-life. I agree with seeing your GP. But may I suggest some other things you can do?

We had a gratitude tree in our family in November, each day each member of our family would write one thing they were grateful for that day, on a paper leaf and attach it to our tree. Some days were harder than others but after a while it became easier - by the end of the third week although harder to think of newer things, it was easier to be grateful and our family mood improved. All of our children have been affect very positively and although it doesn’t change the difficulties faced with covid it has helped us all cope better and feel more joy.

We then challenged them to do one act of service a day in December - not huge. It may just be holding a door for someone, saying hello and smiling. Our son decided to buy a homeless gentleman a cup of coffee the other day and he was so happy he had thought about it himself and helped someone else out.

I hope these suggestions are seen in the light I intend - just an example of what has helped our family and not bragging. We were really struggling in October and as a Mom I needed to do something - so this is what I came up with.

Wishing all the best and hoping you feel lighter soon.

Merry Christmas and bring on 2021. ☺️

[CecilyParsley]

Hi there, I agree with everything the lovely people here have said. Some great advice. I do think that you should see your GP who can offer support. I personally have to take antidepressants because it just helps me cope with the relentlessness of my illness and the huge change to my life and loss of career and friendships. I have also had counselling when I feel overwhelmed and sad and I am waiting to be seen again. It really helped me talk through my feelings of sadness in a way someone close to me could not have done. On a day to day basis I bake, it gives me pleasure and on bad days it is a real achievement. I really hope that you find something to help you in these very difficult times xx