Hi everyone I have not been well for a couple of months suffering badly with fatigue, joint pain, kidney infection and now emotional instability. I have had a lot of stress which I know has contributed to it but unfortunately there is nothing I can do to change that, my children have epilepsy and have been having multiple seizures lately, I also work in a high stress job, that I love, I was made to take the last week off work by my manager due to their concerns about my apparent rudeness to some other staff members. I am struggling with this as they just keep saying that they understand I am ill but they don't listen to what is actually going on. I gave my manager the employers guide to lupus and he skimmed it while I was there then just made silly jokes about parts of it I should be used to this as I have coeliac and he also thinks that it is a joke and calls me a fussy eater, I no longer go out with the staff for meals etc as I am fed up being the only one that can't eat, because they won't go somewhere I can eat, they make silly comments and have now taken to having cream cakes at staff meetings and birthdays so I asked if it would be possible to know in advance so I could be prepared and bring something for myself which is one of the things that I have upset people over, my deputy head even said that I couldn't expect them to go to extra trouble just for me so I explained again that all I wanted was to know in advance so I could prepare. I know I can be snappy, I don't suffer fools, but have explained lots of times that if I have been out of order to tell me and I will deal with it unfortunately I was called to an unexpected meeting last thing on Friday, it had been a difficult day and I had been hurt by a student so was already slightly off kilter, and my manager and deputy sat me down to tell me how I had upset staff they weren't interested in listening to my side of it or anything. I was extremely upset and spent the hour and a half crying while they just kept repeating the same stuff even when I tried to explain how they and the other staff had made me feel and how the problems they were referring to all start with an incident by the other staff, an example is when the cookery teacher and ta asked everyday for a dish to serve my students food in and after a month of explaining that I don't have any dishes I said why didn't they just give it to them on plates as they do to all the other students, I was told that they were not my slaves and were not there to do my dishes? I explained that I have never asked them to do my or my students dishes as we all do our own but that was ignored and the emphasis put back on how much I had upset them, by the way the cookery teacher is my managers wife.
This is not the first time this has happened they have terrible ways of dealing with issues that are really affecting my mental health to the point that the doctor signed me off with anxiety due to work and I spent the entire week crying, during that time they did not contact me at all even to see if I was still upset and they have made out to my ta's that I decided to take the week off not told to? Luckily they know that is not true as they have seen the way I have been being treated and that I don't take time off, I have just worked through a 3 week kidney infection without complaint, I love my job and am perfectly capable of doing it well, yes I am ill but I manage my illness as best I can but where do I go from here? If I complain about my treatment it will be worse working with them but if I ignore it again I'm going to keep being treated like this until they drive me to quit, which I would have done if I could afford to be without a job.
I am in agony now with my joints and know the stress is making it worse any advice gratefully received. Xxxxxxxxxx