This is honestly the worse ever .I would've rather not felt good for a day or 2. I got a kidney infection and then it just came back with a vengeance of hell .Now I can't even think make ad's... I sell jewelry it took me 10 hrs to make 10 ads really it use to take 7 min an ad.But sense I cannot think of normal words a 1st grader can spell my typing is much slower..I kept spelling surrounding "cirrounding" not only once that was 1 of the worse.Because I did it like 4 times in a row.I already lost my physical health now my mind.This is BS I see all these lazy people and I wish I could just be them .They want to lay in bed all day why didn't they get this ?Why someone with ambition and a want to live and do things and be someone.I use to feel on top of the world. Now I feel like I am climbing out of a mud hole and someone pours more water down it the moment I go to step up.I'm getting colder and colder and I have a serious piss poor attitude about everything.I was sad now I'm just enraged.I feel so mad I could breath fire.I want to just scream there has to be enough people with this where they can make somehting that doesn't take months or yrs some say to work plaquenil 2 months it has done nothing if anything I'm worse than I was.Bleeding ulcers kidney stone and infection and my head feels like its in a vise grip...I cant talk to anyone or complain so its just bottling up why complain it wont help it people see already look at me like they feel bad.I dont want that ..I liked being the person to have things and work and go forward in life.Now its just like paused.I litteraly am stuck at home for days on end because of the pain in my feet and ankles I cant freakin walk some days.I know ,I know it could always be worse I know that but ef this dieases I'm so sick of it sick to my stomach its all I can think about because its all i feel agony!I feel like 1 of those weird gothic people who wine about everything and say the world is a cold shell blah blah blah but thats not me or it was not. I use to be happy and make everyone around me laugh now I just have this stern look about myself.And I hate to be asked "how do you feel?Now I say"just great thats why I'm sitting here with a murderess looking stare.
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