Sick of anxiety

[betterlife6]

Hi everyone. This is my first time on here. I’m sick of my anxiety and it’s affecting my day to day life and now my relationship. I worry about everything and feel crippled by anything in the past. My boyfriend has a daughter from his previous relationship and I find myself obsessing over it and cannot get past his ex. It’s ridiculous and it’s hurting my relationship and my daily mental health now. Does anyone have a similar situation?

[MariaLove123]

It sounds like a situation issue. And unfortunately changes need to be made in order to feel better. Relationships have to have trust and less anxiety. If you’re always upset about the ex, you have to really ask yourself why. And talk to them.

[Hidden]

Hello betterlife6

Well done posting , that first post is a big step and admitting how you feel so that is a positive even though I can feel you are feeling less than positive about yourself at the moment

When we have anxiety we have very low self esteem and this is a massive contribution why we struggle to trust others because we usually don't love ourselves so that leaves a great big question mark as to why someone else could and why are they with us and in your case because there is still an ex that has to and will be in your boyfriends life because of their Daughter you will be wondering why he is with you and not her ?

But the answer is in the "ex" there is always a reason why someone is an "ex " and the reason is because it did not work out and there is no love there any more , try and remember this when your insecurities come in

It is a big ask when we take someone on that already has children , we have to feel secure in ourselves and this is why you will be struggling as I feel you don't feel that way but when you do take someone on with a child you have to be able to accept them and their past and their child

You need to ask yourself if you can seriously do this ? are you ready to work on this because you will have to if it is going to work but many relationships do work even when one has children and so can yours if you really want it

You need however to get help , I think some Counselling would go a long way in helping you to get to the root of your anxiety and fears , maybe medication will help even if for a short while but speaking with your Doctor, been honest and letting them help you is what you need to be doing

I would if you have not already speak with your Boyfriend , tell him how your anxiety is taking over and you are reacting in a way you don't like or are copying with and how much you love him and his Daughter ( as they come as a package ) and that you are going to get help but you would also like his support

Many of us have felt the way you do but we have to get the help we need because if it be this relationship or any other in the future without sorting ourselves out that anxiety will always creep in and try and ruin everything as it likes control so look at taking that control back and getting your life back to , you can do this

Take Care x

[designguy]

Hello Betterlife, as Lulu suggested, the best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship is to find a good therapist to work with. My guess is that the majority of us with anxiety disorder also have issues with intimacy, commitment, etc... all of which make relationships more difficult.

My anxiety disorder almost prevented me from having the best relationship of my life, which is my marriage. Fortunately for me, my wife was wiser and more understanding and I sought help for my anxiety disorder

[betterlife6]

Hi! I took the step to talk to my boyfriend last night and ask for his support as I find a therapist. He is the man I want to marry but before I can be 100% for us, I need to work on myself. Posting on here really gave me the courage I needed to talk to him. Thank you guys for the support

[Hidden in reply to betterlife6]

Thank you for sharing!

- Alisha