Life Gets Tough

My husband is still in the hospital 2 months now and it seems like he's wasting away. He is smaller than he ever was in life and he isn't a very big man. I want him out of there it bothers me when they have to stop feeding or halt the heparin for his echo to do procedures or surgeries. He wants to leave but I don't know what to do because he can't. This is not the life I want for him and I feel so helpless I don't have the money for parking at the hospital and my visits have gotten so short because I have young children that also need me

10 Replies

  • My heart feels for you i know how frustrating it is .my partner was in itu for a while and he lost 3 stone . am grateful he is home now . it must be so hard for you now kids are off school. I don't drive but i was getting a weekly bus ticket for £13 . Our son is nearly 2 and i had the support of his nan looking after him and to be honest i only seen him forca couple hours here and there because it was touch and go for a while x i had to put my trust in the doctors and nurses and just prayed constantly xxxx hope things improve soon you and your family are in my thoughts xx

  • I'm very sorry to hear what you are going through!

    Is your husband in Intensive Care or on the ward?

    Why is he in hospital and/or ICU, what's keeping him there?

  • He's in LRU his lungs bowels and machines hooked up to him is what's prolonging his stay

  • I feel for you in this critical situation, please remind yourself your husband is in the very best place. The medical stall are so wonderful, empathetic, compassionate and always there for him. Life can feel so hard to cope with but without knowing the outcome. I, too wanted to leave my hospital bed but the staff pulled me through the most hardest time in my life and I simply can't believe what happened to me. Please try and remain positive and most importantly be kind and compassionate with yourself.

  • HI, I can understand how difficult you must be finding it, I spent 3 months in ICU and lost almost 4st, my wife never gave up hope that the doctors where doing all they could even though others thought at times they could have done more, believe me they will be doing all they can for your husband as they are some of the most caring dedicated people I've met.

    Have you spoken to anyone about the cost of parking as due to the efforts of the local ICUsteps support group where I was in Hospital we managed to get free parking for ICU patients relatives, it may be worth speaking to the PAL's office at the hospital to see if they can help as many of us know what a drain on finances it can be at such a difficult traumatic time.


  • Not yet

  • I can only speak from the patient point of view. I also wanted to leave the hospital when I was in the ICU, but I realise now that I wasn't completely aware of the situation I was in and that no way would it have been in my best interests. I lost a lot of weight and hardly recognised myself when I first looked in a mirror. Has your husband had a trachy fitted yet? When I had the ventilator tube it gave me a lot of discomfort and I was greatly relieved when this was removed and replaced with a trachy. After a couple of weeks there was a device that could be attached to it for short periods of time that enabled me to speak.

    I hope and pray that things will start to work out. Take care of yourself. 🙏

  • He is doing much better with the trach. I am having a harder time with his family more than anything I can't tell you where my mind is right now due to lack of sleep thinking and wondering if my own health is all right I feel like I'm in a fog

  • Is your husband still ventilated with the tracheostomy? A tracheostomy itself shouldn't keep him in hospital.

  • He's determined to be home the Ecmo will be removed soon and he's breathing on his own since the valves to repair his lungs were put in

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