Husband can't speak after being attacked in December

[Juniorbhoy]

He can only say certain words like now no f***n hell. Has anyone else been in this situation plz. It is now 15 weeks after attack!

[Pairofboots]

My first job was in the print, so I blame that for my fing and blinding.

15 weeks is, in brain recovery terms is no time at all. That isn't any comfort, I know.

The brain is very complex, and depending on what part was damaged will have a baring on what difficulties your husband has, and the likelihood of the level of recovery.

His care team should inform you of the prognosis, and what they can help him with, and help you with.

He will be frustrated, there will be many things he did without a second thought once, and probably things he wants to say.

Headway has a wealth of knowledge and can support both of you along the journey ahead.

The good thing about this forum is there are people who have taken that journey, and it is a safe place to ask questions. Carers/partners have a particularly hard time, wanting to do the right thing, but not knowing what. It is ok to not know. Everyone here, started from the same point.

You have started by posting, you may not know what you want to know, and that is also ok. You have joined a club no one would want to join, but you are here now, and everyone is here for you.

[Juniorbhoy in reply to Pairofboots]

Thank you for your reply.

Very true about joining a club no-one wishes to join through choice!

[leila65]

Hi

Sorry to hear about your husband. As already stated 15 weeks is a very short time although it must feel like a lifetime to you! My son had severe TBI possible assault and he could not speak at the beginning after coming out of coma... And then when he did it was mainly swearing (which he never usually did) it's quite common that apparently... It was like he had no filter at all. He started to slowly say more.. However didn't make sense. He couldn't understand or ask for things he wanted. It was very difficult not knowing whether this would get better though it most certainly has. We are now 8months post recovery. He can talk quite well now though still can't remember lots of words... His memory isnt great... And yes he does require support with communication at times. Some days he talks quite fluently... Some it feels like I'm speaking a different language.

It's a long process so just be aware it may take a lot more time to see more progress... But that doesn't mean it won't happen. The brain needs time to recover and the older the brain is the longer that may be.. Younger ones like my son are more elastic he has bounced back considering the size of the initial impact.

Keep reassuring your hubby that he will talk in time. I used to say to my son... Your getting better each day (even when there was no sign of it) and now it's his mantra in life... 'I'm getting better each day'.

It can be pure hell seeing a loved one struggle to talk... So i hope you have support around you... counselling for me helped enormously! Allow yourself time to recharge... And just focus on each new word he says... It will get better... Take each day as it comes.

Keep sharing.... This forum helps me immensely best of luck to you and your hubby

[Juniorbhoy in reply to leila65]

Thank you for your reply. Wishing both you and your son best wishes and continued improvement.

I am a true believer in one day at a time xx

[saville75]

Hey there, I can speak for myself that I had my brain injury on 11th September 2008. I didn't speak a word until 27th October - from what I hear, 15 weeks is not that long a time. Hope it changes for you soon x

[Juniorbhoy in reply to saville75]

Thank you Best wishes to you too xx

[sealiphone]

Very early days and those who're down the road know that things can change a lot more than you could believe possible when things looked grim.

I'd certainly see if you can speak to the consultant but even they may be in the "We will have to wait and see, time is a great healer", that was what I was told when everything wasn't working right

[Juniorbhoy in reply to sealiphone]

Hiya that's the exact reply we get from Consultant, "you are at the beginning of a very long road" and also " no two brain injuries are the same" xx

[cat3]

Swearing is common behaviour after brain injury. I would never swear among none-familiars, but after a brain haemorrhage I apparently did little else..... seriously embarrassing my family and alarming them with what they saw as a weird personality change.

6 months later I returned to thank the ICU staff (though I'd no memory of them or the ward) and to apologise for my unacceptable behaviour. I was welcomed and hugged by the whole team and assured that ripe language is the norm during acute neuro care in the majority of patients !

Give your husband time. I'm sure it's already felt like an eternity for you, but whilst your man's brain is trying to make sense of a strange situation, reasoning is even more of a challenge and takes time & patience.

We're always here to listen/talk m'dear…. Cat x

[Juniorbhoy in reply to cat3]

Thank you Cat I wish you all the best with your daily recovery xx

[Broken_Doll]

Yes, this was something I had issues with during the acute phase of my recovery. I had very little speech and to begin with it was just “f#%*” then rather annoyingly I kept saying “I’m hungry, have you got a biscuit?” even though that isn’t what I was about to say.

I couldn’t tell you how long it was that I couldn’t speak, but once I could speak I had a persistent stutter for about 18 months after my accident. I then had 18 months of speech and language therapy when I moved to Bristol (I didn’t receive any acute rehabilitation or aftercare in Hampshire).

I still have occasional word finding difficulties, but I have achieved fairly good grades for my first year university presentations.

Hold tight, 15 weeks is nothing in the scheme of brain injury. It’s a long road but with persistence and patience a lot can be gained.

[Juniorbhoy in reply to Broken_Doll]

Thank you for your reply, it really does seem like a long time ago this happened to him. Best of luck to you xx

[Flumptious]

I had my accident in July 2005, and I have no memory at all of anything that happened for the two years before Christmas that year. By then, I was speaking, but it was all very blurry and slurred.

So what the others say is right: recovery is slow, but don't give up, it takes time.

Here is a photo of the signs they put on the wall in the hospital, several months after my accident. I don't remember blinking yes and no, at all, but I do remember, some time after that, people not really understanding me when I spoke to them.

He *will* get better! He may never get back to exactly the way he used to be (I certainly haven't!), but he will get better. Be patient!

Signs they put on the wall in hospital

[Juniorbhoy in reply to Flumptious]

Hi Flumptious

Thank you for replying to my post. My husband was viciously attacked 2 years 10 months ago. He still cannot speak even though we spent 10 months in Brain Rehab Unit for him to receive daily therapies. Kevin still gets two 1 hour sessions of Speech & Language therapy weekly in our home.

Although he can repeat one word at a time, he cannot speak or write due to damage done during attack.

Every day is a struggle trying to understand what he is trying to say but I am so grateful he is alive and we take it one day at a time. I wish you all the best in your recovery.

Best wishes

Juniorboy