Tracheostomy Today

[HopeforTony]

Well after consultation I feel the best option is to move forward so we spoke with his father to allow for Tony to get his tracheostomy and peg. I’m so very nervous and hope everything goes well. I just want what is best I’m just very scared and nervous. Today is day 11 of coma and the movements he made the other day show me there’s some possibility for change. I’m so nervous I will see my nana soon at hospital then go see Tony before his surgery and I’ll stay until they are done. I hope he’ll be okay. I’m so sorry this is happening.

So his daughter whom he doesn’t have a relationship with at all since she was 17 now in her 20s because of the ex wife asked me to call her and all she did was grill me on the phone then hang up on me. It’s very hard for me to constantly recount what happened because I replay it already in my head everyday it’s so traumatic.I don’t need this from her I have tried to push him to reach out to her before but she never seemed to care then so it’s frustrating to be treated like this now on the phone. It’s been me and Tony just us two for almost ten years. I’ve been with him every day. No one will come in now or could ever change that. I will continue to be here for him and research with hopes of better options for him.

[sca2013]

Tony is very lucky to have you in his life. I can tell you really care and love him very much. Don't worry about his daughter and him at this point. That may be something for the future. Please remember you are not responsible for how that relationship is - that is between the two of them.

One thing I have used that helps me in situations with unknown outcomes has been to make it ok if the worst thing happens. For whatever reason that seems to calm me down and things usually turn out better than I thought they might. Seems to reduce my stress levels. Sending you peace and comfort as you're waiting.

[HopeforTony in reply to sca2013]

I’m a pessimistic so I always think the worse. I guess what I meant was that I had tried to facilitate a relationship years ago so for her to speak to me like that was astonishing and rude. I didn’t force him but it helped for a little bit until she kept asking him for things but couldn’t even bother to say happy Father’s Day or wish him a happy bday and it hurt him and I watched him go trough it.She chose to act That way and after that I left it alone. I was just being supportive even though I didn’t like what she did. As of now my focus is hoping everything goes well and preparing myself to see him in this way now. It’s all so traumatic. Ty for your words as always

[cat3]

I'm going to address you as 'Hope' if that's OK ?

I know how cruel remarks can sting. But in what looks like a case of jealousy (maybe passed on from the mother) there's little point in trying to reason, so just hang up. If she really cared about her dad she'd be there in a hearbeat, regardless of family politics.

Looking after yourself and being strong for Tony is all that matters right now...........

Keep on with the updates m'love. Sending more good wishes and hugs. xx

[HopeforTony in reply to cat3]

Your right it’s fine my name is Armani I forgot to mention that to everyone. You are right i must remain focused on us. Thanks Cat

[cat3 in reply to HopeforTony]

Great name ! 😖

[LindaHannah]

You have made right decision re PEG and trachy. I am sorry to hear the conversation with Tony's daughter seemed so tense. Fingers crossed re the surgery xxx

[HopeforTony in reply to LindaHannah]

Yes me too thanks

[HopeforTony]

Yes very true thanks for allowing

[kerr28]

Hi HopeforTony

I and Amanda's family have not regretted getting her fitted with a tracheostomy 4 days ago and now a PEG yesterday afternoon because she's defiantly benefited from having both fitted.

Just to let you know that I'm and now Amanda's family are still thinking about you, Tony and his family in our prayers and thoughts 24/7 and send all our love and hugs to you all as well.

Laura and Amanda's familyxxxx

[HopeforTony in reply to kerr28]

That’s good to hear it’s all so scary and stressful how is she doing? I prayed for you all this morning. I’m heading to Tony now that I’m done with my nan. She has finally been able to eat food today it was a big day for her. Well thanks as always to you and Amanda family

[kerr28 in reply to HopeforTony]

Hi

They has been a small change in Amanda's condition because just an hour ago she started breathing by herself. Hopefully if she's still breathing by herself tomorrow morning the doctors will look at starting to wean her off the vent.

Thank you for your ongoing prayers for Amanda and us all.

We're all still thinking of you, Tony and his family in our prayers and thoughts 24/7 and send all of our love and hugs as well.

Laura and Amanda's familyxxxx

[HopeforTony in reply to kerr28]

That sounds good and very promising hope all goes well !