I NEED a moan and I'm sorry guys but it has to you to moan to. Ok Iv been quite a bit of pain that started a couple of months ago but the doctor has given me a cocktail of pain killers so things were returning to normal ish. You will know what I mean , the sole destroying agony you get. Not been able to open your mouth without being very ratty or bursting into tears. It's taken me back to the feeling I ha a lot of why did you keep me alive for this.
Right RANT over ish. Maybe I should go back to the beginning.
I was at the doctors on friday when some stupid , really stupid ladie decided she got stress with the guy next to her and ploughed into my car taking the whole front off. Thing is I could see what was going to happen. I was stationary in my car and really just couldn't believe it. I kept saying what tou doing and then a bit of swearing and then it happened. My foot lifted off the brink and next thing I realised was I was rolling backwards into a row of parked cars so had to slake my brakes on. That my ptsd set off. Her car came at me from how I remember it the first time. So I was in hospital on Friday then Saturday, the walk in centre and then the doctors for the last 3 days and again tomorrow. Not only is my car gone but so is the full tank of petrol to get half way down country on Christmas Day. My Christmas is totally destroyed. I live on my own now 200 miles from my family.
I AM SO CROSS, VERY VERY CROSS. . I had just an hour before put tinsel all over the inside of my car and filled it with Christmas pressies to drop off at uni for the sprog. Now she's got none and they in bags and staying in bags cause I can't look at them. I'm an a very Christmassy person and she has wiped every sing bit of Christmas spirit out of me
I'm very depressed, very angry and very stressed. Granted my body was already broken but it hasn't been this bad for a long long time
Help me guys please, help me out of this rut xx