5,446 members7,839 posts

Am I daft had enough

It has been 5 long and painful years since my sah

But recently I have become severely depressesed no sleep to much pain creditors chasing me hourly I ammo earning what I used to circa £165,000

My debts are huge I and the cab explained to these debt collectors and bailiffs but still the harass me I am to proud to tell my family the final straw was a writ to repossess my house

To stop me doing a stupid thing I gave my car keys to a mate telling him not to give them back only when he in car with me or I might just slam into a bridge

To end it all would be weak last

Nigt I managed an hour of sleep hopefully tonight more gp comming tomorrow for depression. help please


16 Replies

Neil Honey,

Please tell your family, Or phone headway. That dark place you are in can be sorted.Please dont try and deal with things on your own. I think a lot of us after brain trauma have been where you are . I know that I was. I was proud too. But quickly found out that the saying' a trouble shared is a trouble halved' is so true.

Sending you Big Hugs x


drusilla thank you spoke to my ex faincee jacqueline earlier after i posted my question she cheered me up reatly reminding me what a plonker i was being and what ever these money chasers do what they don't know is that once upon a time i walked out of a meeting after being offered an incentive aka bribe of 1 million dollars no am ok now and looking forward to a solid few hours sleep and a day trip to belgium soon then ireland dublin for a few days around my birthday in january thank you so much for taking the time to care truly appreciated life can get lonley at times especially as i have never liuved alone more so as a disabled person without a love interest xx neil


hello neil .. so sorry ya feeling down although im not immune myself to those feeling now and again .. just offering some practical advice here .. the CAB should be dealing with these creditors on your behalf ( you will need to sign a form for that ) and if you get any other call from creditors they can be prosicuted for harassment after that .. if they phone just say you need to speak with so an so from the CAB .. im not dealing with it anymore and the CAB are. ! Anything you want to know i surgest you write to them .. and thats it .. nothing else

dont think your ever on your own ! there is support out here when you ask or seek it , ive been taken to EA by the police because ive been that down .... it happens dont be ashamed either we dont judge here nor should anyone else unless they have walked a mile in another mans shoes ... be good

best wishes Paul


thank you the cab has been helping me for a year now just in the last week approaching yet another christmas without the one i love alone another christmas where my chilkdren will not receive a present from me although each christmas since my injury they did phone me as they have done already to say times are tough and not to bother \BUT I DO

BEING AN OPTERMISTIC FELLOW I THOUGHT I WOULD GET A JOB WITHIN A EA OF BEING DISCHARGED FROM HOSPITAL but nothing i even have tried to work pro bono but nothing sure i used to earn a lot of money and now i am poor but i have adjusted well reminding myself i have seen families in africa and india happy on a 25% of what i receive in benefits and they smile and laugh being refused physio by the NHs is affecting me health my legs are like rock all day and hurt like hell pills don't work although i do take tramadol for a backache which allows me some respite I WILLL TALK THOUGH MY OPTIONS WITH THE CAB TOMORROW AND A LAWYER SEE THE DOC AND SEE IF THEY CAN GIVE ME SOMETHING TO MAKE ME SLEEP AND PERHAPS A COUNCELLOR TO SPEAK TO


blimey managed all of 3 hours sleep


My husband left me with a huge pile of debt because he couldn't cope with my illness but despite being left with Bells Palsy after my last op I am now with a wonderful man who makes me feel so happy and really cares for me. Hang on in there, it will get better, and don't do anything silly for the sake of your children, sounds like they don't care about the presents they just love you because you are their Dad. You survived the worst of it, ou can survive this xxx


thank you so much you know what i have no repect for anyone infact they are horrible to leave someone they are supposed to love in the injured arties hour of need it was my decision to release my fiancee of here obligations to me it didn't take long for the ill informed to start with the she dumped neil crap i just hope i find the partner you have after 30 years either married or living with i am not good at being alone its not the sex but the warmth of love and knowing that you trust someone special without reserevation a warm blanket open fire on a windy day

xx neil


mine was a boyfriend who lived here untill 1 year 2 months ago then went he pops here im not totaly daft its only 2 get more money out of mehe ripped me of car van and song of nearly 10,000 before he went yes im daft letting him threw door but im lonely have only 2 family left a sister who livesaway a elderly auntwho got parkinsons so i carnt trouble her in her 80's, i feel so daft so used i used 2 just get on a plane get of 2 any where new york all over now the shop nightmare your husband needs kick up behind you were marriedi guess ill never find anyone nowill give my x boyfriend 10 out 10 for conning me started the con couple months after my brain op nice not now im writeing it here im 46 dont want rest life alone but i should stop him coming asking for £5.00 for his fags thats not love care oh he says he does even says he want come back but he needs to explain to his kids there 30 years old ere lies or is that me


Hi Neil,

Thank you for your post, and very sorry to hear of the way you are feeling. The comments left by our members have been really spot on - I can see these have helped you already.

There is support that we can give here at Headway, we've responded to some of your previous posts but this seems like an issue that would benefit from talking through one-on-one with one of our helpline team. They can provide support over the phone, and discuss further sources of support, including local Headway groups and branches.

Please give them a call free on 0808 800 2244 between 9 and 5, Monday to Friday, or email helpline@headway.org.uk. Alternatively, send us a private message on here with your phone number and we can get them to call you (please don't post your number on the public forum).

We look forward to hearing from you soon,

Best wishes,



thank you so much i only managed 3 hrs sleep last night i will wait to see what my gp does after 12 having been stuck out this am no willing arm to get me home i need to warm up have a sleep and then work out by phoning the dwp to discover how much i receive tomorrow afterwhich a row with bank about the ineviatble charges i will be levied then work out what i am goinbg to do when coaching the kids at rye rugby on sunday i also need to contact a lawyer and cab about the potential harrassment of me by my creditors


Hi Neil

I have read all of your posts and I hope you would agree that your life is hectic and stressful at the minute. You seem to be making a good attempt at sorting each problem out but it appears to me that you are struggling with the pressure of it all. You have mentioned how little you are sleeping and I think it must be nearly impossible to function well (and therefore sort out your problems) after a period with so little sleep.

I strongly urge you to contact the Headway helpline, as suggested above, as they will be able to support and reassure you. The better you feel, the better you will sleep. Please don't delay, it is just a phone call and can be done before any of the tasks you have set yourself.

I will be thinking of you and wish you well Neil.


thank you i did e mail headway helpline earier today but no reply yet

my gp agreed that i am over tired and depressed has prescribed sleeping pills as well as promised to exert pressure on nhs physios to give me wht i have needed for a year legs stretched to yelping and an open letter stating my current medical condition that i can send to all my creditors pleading to lay off with the pills a decent 6 hrs asleep and a day out tomorrow feel sure will be more positive soon neil


update have been prescribed dosulepin which an anti depressant popped 1 an hour ago already working am drowsy hopefully more than 5 hrs sleep tonight ,,, hopefully



Hello Neil, I sincerely hope you managed to got some sleep. Realyy pleased you have seen your doctor and you have found Headway for support. Please don't worry about presents for your children, the best present they have is that they still have their Dad. My Mum had a SAH last December, I really didn't care about Christmas, I just wanted her to get better. She has recovered really well, still has some issues with concentration and suffered with joint pain and probably other things she doesnt mention but all things considered she is doing great. However my Dad then suffered a massive SAH in August and he is still in hospital unable to speak, walk or do anything for himself. I would give all my Christmas presents up forever if it meant he would be well enough to have some quality of life. Please don't beat yourself up, it doesnt matter as long as they've got you. Wishing you all the best, Helen


than you i did take a pill and enjoyed a great sleep ready for a new day as benefiyts day so i am going out to buy xmas presents may eveb buy myself a wee present to

doc told me i am exhausted tried must stop panicking to calm down


i can totaly realte i go debts but im sleepinprob 2/ to 3 hoursfriday had 1 i feel if neil ask neuro epicilts or his doc for some sort letter cab could use it with letters or wealfair rights there a online debt pages its part of cab you can fill your self do letters to im so sorry dont rember name but if you get on your cab page go debtshould bring it up , you gave a friend your car may i ask have you got i back, please be carefullon that 1 even if youd trust them foreer i gt stung by my so called b/friendim not saying your m8s anything like that just please keep eye on time ive not tried get job id forgot who id spokee to by time i came out and so tired but not sleeing like you a neuro specilist nurse said to my i was vunerable before i was 100x's more now, she was right the aout you owe is not inportant its the upset worry exta stress i doing to you that link on cab you can get advice on tere phone lines to hopefully you find it im very sorry i carnt rember link on it i was 1st given it in cab it is not 1 of these debt companys could you put your carlog book into a family members nametheres somthing called a debt relife order lasts 7 years some i no had 1 no baliff is allowed to bother you on the cab help it tells yo pros cons i thinking hard here as much as whats left in works debt line on cab rings omthing in my head v


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