Fibromyalgia Action UK
40,267 members52,375 posts

Thanks to all

Just a short note to say thanks for the support i still have no wish to survive and not being helped now by full flare thanks to my suicidal state to add insult to injury the dip not happy with taking my income away are calling in to check on my husbands residential status for the third time he was born here.... And has only been dead since 15th of December they won't even let me grieve. when he lived in Zimbabwe all British people were forced to give up their passports from other countries and swear allegance to mugabe or be turned out with the clothes on their back

so rob has a Zimbabwe passport just for the record i have a pale skin and we were not racist. that came from the dutch descent via the old way of life in south Africa a d the faded tthat we are part of south Africa is yet another myth anyhow this Was just to say thanks to you ' all Petal

5 Replies

oh petal, I wish I was near enough to give you a hug! you are still in grief for rob, worn out from caring for him, missing your daughter and mithered by the benefits people. Please take comfort from knowing we care for you.

keep coming on here and talking, it's important.


sandra x.


Of course you are still grieving .. I know it's a long shot but do you have robs birth certificate surely that will be enough for them, if not you can get a copy and then they will HAVE to believe he was born in this country.

Hugs VG x


Theyve checked three times already.....I also have his moms and his folks marriage cert doesnt help


Oh my goodness, poor Petal, it's enough coping with grief, you shouldn't have to worry about all of this too. it's understandable that you are struggling right now my dear. I cannot understand why a Birth Certificate won't suffice. Have you presented them with your husband's Death Certificate because this would state clearly where he was born. That might help, I hope it does. I trust you have that in your possession now.

Have you considered contacting CRUSE Bereavement Care, CRUSE Bereavement Care - they promote the well-being of bereaved people and enable anyone bereaved by death to understand their grief and cope with their loss. It might be a comfort to you. Their contact details are below -

Daytime Helpline 0844 477 9400

Email -

Details of local branches -


Also it might help how you are feeling at the moment to talk to the Samaritans, they offer 24/7 support and understanding when we feel very anxious, upset and worried by all the problems we may be facing. By feeling as low as you do at the moment you need an extra level of support and the Samaritans are specially trained in these circumstances to try to help you by listening and understanding. Their contact info is below -


08457 90 90 90

The CAB might also be a useful port of call for you at the moment, by telling them about your predicament regarding your late husband's status, they should be able to advise you on this. It might be worth making an appointment to see them when you feel up to it. They have access to a wealth of information and should be able to advise you on your position regarding this. For more details on their contact info, please see below -

Please know that we are always here for you Petal, we do understand and we do care for you. We will do our best to try to help and support you as much as we can through this difficult time.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you are. Bless you my dear, we are all thinking of you at the moment.

(((hug))) xxx



I cannot begin to imagine what you have been through and what you are going through now. I cannot offer much in the way of advice, but I can offer to try to support you as other members are doing XXXXX


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