Coping and Acceptance

Hi everyone, i'm new to the site and have been reading a lot of the other blogs and posts. I am 28 and was diagnosed with fibro almost 2 years ago (after a year of tests and being sent from one place to another.

I had just been medically discharged from the Royal Navy and was newly married when my symptoms got worse and worse. I found that it was a huge relief to finally get a diagnosis but I am still finding it so difficult to accept the limitations this terrible illness causes.

I refused to give up on my dream of being a nurse so decided to go to college, some how got through that and am now in second year at Uni. The trouble is it is taking everything I have just to get through the day at the moment and seems impossible to get any studying done!

I try to pace myself but the constant pain, exhaustion and headaches just make me want to sleep and cry all the time. Like many of you have said I too try to put on a happy face a pretend everything it fine to the outside world.

I cant seem to get meds right to help with pain and sleeping because I have to drive, sit in lectures and got out on work placement so cant be too "drugged up". On top of that the lack of exercise I can do now combined with comfort eating (chocolate is great medicine :) has caused me to put on so much weight which is no doubt making pain worse!

Can anyone suggest anything to help??

Very Gentle hugs to you all

Becky xx

9 Replies

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  • Hello and welcome to our lovely forum Becky, you are most welcome here!

    Take a look around our Questions, Blogs and Tags, there is a wealth of information there, advice, support, personal experiences and friendship too! Please read our FibroAction Guidelines, you will find these under Blogs at the top, please select FibroAction Blogs and then scroll down. We ask all our new members to read these, many thanks.

    If you have any worries or concerns, please do not hesitate to ask us, we are always only too happy to help. We all understand, we are all in the same boat here.

    I hope you enjoy your time at FibroAction!

  • So sorry to hear you're having a tough time coping with Uni and placements etc. I remember how tough this was when my daughter did her nursing training and she was well. It is bound to take its toll on you and all the studying too.

    I wonder have you had a chat with your GP lately. I know how hard this is to fit in when you have a busy schedule, but it really would be worthwhile. Not all meds give you the drugged up feeling, you could be prescribed pain relief to help you manage your symptoms better and make sure you feel more able to cope with everything.

    You also need to mention your headaches, these could be down to the studying you are doing and all the worry about coping etc. It might be the case that your GP prescribes you antidepressants to help you cope better and as some antidepressants have a sedative effect, these might help you sleep better. Restorative sleep helps us to manage the following day better which would help you at Uni etc.

    Speak to your GP about all of these things and I hope you will feel a bit better and more able to handle everything.

    Please feel free at any time to come into our community to off load, have a chat, to talk about your worries or any concerns you may have. We are always only too happy to help where we can.

    Please let us know how you get on at the GP's. Take care. Here's a hug for you (((hug))) xx

  • Hi and welcome, unfortunately the very thing that helps with sleep anti depressants ... I had to try 3 before I found ones that suited and didn't give me horrible side affects do tend to make a lot of us crave chocolate and then the pounds creep on...I have had to put my family on chocolate guard and they don't let me eat as much as I crave or I would literally look like jabba the hut. But the sleep is worth it ... Please come back here as much as you need there is always someone who will know something you want to ask .. Or just have a good old moan on a bad day.... As Libby says if you can find a sympathetic gp then that helps enormously and they will be willing to go through the trial and error period to find the meds that suit you

    VG x

  • Thank you VG and Liberty, I am currently taking solpadol 30/500 and duloxcetine 60mg which are not helping at all with pain or sleep. My Dr is quite good - she does want to help. Have tried amitryptiline in the past but it made me really drowsy the next day. Also tried gabapentin recently but it just made me really aggressive so I decided to stop it.

    Tried to make an appt with Dr today but she doesnt have anything for the next 2 weeks.

    Thanks again for your advice and support - it really helps to talk to people who understand! xx

  • Is there another Doctor at your practice that you might be able to see earlier Becky?! Might be worth trying. xxx

  • Hi Becky. For me this is all about toxins. It seems I've had food and chemical sensitivities dice childhood...which I didn't know about. The build up of toxins of Years has left me like this. Looking for what my triggers are has meant some research. The Lectin story (which does google) has been really helpful. The main thing to avoid are caffiene, aspartame, alcohol, msg, yeast. Then its up to the individual to look at dairy, wheat, gluten, nightshades, pulses, moulds and fungus....etc etc. By cutting out dairy and nightshades especially, I am so much better. Look for what you crave....the chances are you're reacting to it. Keep a food and symptom diary. It's not just foods though. I react to energy saving light bulbs, some washing cosmetics etc. And of course stress is a big toxin. I seem to have a reaction to my own adrenalin ! I did my return to nursing with this illness and before finding out about toxins. Good luick with your course. People pleasing is also a toxin of mine.....putting people's needs above my own. Be careful not to lose YOU. Meditation is wonderful x

  • Hi stepper, thank you for your reply it is really helpful. Quite worrying also as I have about 4 coffee's with sweetner in everyday!! really don't know how I would cope with the exhaustion without caffeine! I tend to crave anything that is bad for me such as chocolate and sugary or fatty foods - with really don't help the weight problem. Think I will try meditation too cos I am also a real people pleaser and don't really have any energy left for looking after me by the time I have sorted out everyone else.

    Thank you for your help! xx

  • Welcome to the site hun. It comes to something when we get so bad we are driven to find help online. You could not have chosen a better site. I am not on any pain meds, mine started 26 years ago, and I was finally diagnosed 4 years after initial onset. I know what you mean about the foods we should not eat, been there, done that and then lost a massive 7 stone in two years. It is a constant battle, weight up and down too, but I have never gone back to the weight I was as I founf it makes things worse. I know when I have put weight on without even stepping on a scale as my problems get worse. But now I have COPD and Emphysema too, which causes weight loss so my battle has reversed. I am now having to add a few more calories to keep my weight stable without going overboard. I went through years of trying this pill and that pill. One would work and then months later it would stop working. So I basically became a guinea pig for the GPs and consultants, even to the point of having some stuff injected via needles bottom to top of spine, either side of spine. That was a ruddy painful procedure to go through and was actually worse than the Fibro pain. Then I reacted to it, so had I been brave enough to want it again I would not have been able too. I tend to have a long soak in a warm bath filled with Radox bubbles. Now this would be a good thing if I could actually get my feet into the water for long enough. But I have Gout as well as no working pulses in the top of my feet. This means my feet are always freezing cold, put them into warm water and the pain levels go through the roof. So I have to dive in, lay back and then shove the feet over the sides of the bath. To get out I have to drain the bath lol. We all have our little ways of dealing with Fibro, and we all have reasons that some things just do not work. So these days I just put up with it, no choice. And now I have to stand up again because everything from the waist donw has gone numb again. Time to hop around the kitchen lol. I applaud you for making the Fibro live around you and not the other way round. That is what I try to do. I hoe you find some relief soon hun xxxxxx

  • Unfortunately sugar encourages Candida overgrowth in the gut. It's worth reading up about apple cider vineger (with the mother in it) lol sounds a weird description but it will google. ACv can reverse Candida so useful stuff. The fats (which I crave by the way) might be a sensitivity to canola (rapeseed) oil....which is used a lot and highly toxic. The Americans have given is corn syrup which is also in soooo many foods and again highly toxic.

    Giving up coffee will give you thumping headaches for a week or so as you detox from caffiene addiction. It used to be diet coke for me. Decaf coffee isn't that bad as a replacement x it really is worth it x stepper

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