Giving it the bird

Well, here I am in my new flat!

It's been a bit of an upheaval having to move again - I am beginning to feel like a nomad as I have moved house six times in the last four years! Anyway, now that I have retired and don't have to chase work, it seems sensible to live nearer to my children, and they're glad to have me help out with cooking and stuff, because they work very long hours. In return they help me with things I can't manage - like unscrewing jars and putting out bins! Silly things really, but a nightmare when you can't do them

My flat is two stories up, nice lift, with a balcony, and near the Quayside in Southampton, so it's all rather glamorous. The only downside is the seagulls. I think it must be their mating season or something because they squawk constantly from daybreak to darkness and it's absolutely deafening.

I don't sleep very well at night - like most of us 'fibrettes', I seem to get more pain when I lie down and try to rest, so I have plan of action; late at night when the gulls have ceased their screeching and settled down in their fishy little nests, I'm going to be up over the roof tops and do a bit of squawking back at the beggars!

AWK! AWK!!!! AAAWWWWKKK!!!!!

I wonder if seagulls would suffer from 'Non-restorative Sleep Syndrome'? It would be interesting to keep them awake for a few nights and find out, wouldn't it now?

On second thoughts,this sort of adventure might get me arrested, and I'm not sure that 'free running' across Southampton's picturesque roof scape is quite the best thing for someone a little stiff in the joints.

Looking at it philosophically, I quite like the old 'gulls. They're noisy, but wonderful to watch as they glide and swoop and slide down the thermals. I wonder what it's like to feel so free and light and fearless?

Best of all I enjoy watcing them from the deck of a nicely-trimmed boat, skipping along in a fresh breeze, with my home port and the local boozer within reach of a couple of hours' sailing. Now that I'm back in dear old Southampton, I intend to be doing just that as soon as I possibly can!

So ... if you're out at sea, and you notice something whizz by ... it might be a bird, it might be a 'plane ... it might be me, out sailing and hunting them thar seagulls!

Salty hugs ... Moffy x

11 Replies

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  • Lovely, thanks for the smile that brought to my face, especially the night-time revenge! Hugs.

  • I'm just down the road from you in Totton ! There are some very nice flats round there Moffy . .

    Hope you manage to settle now and enjoy having your family nearby .

    xx

  • thankyou moffy, for a moment I was there with you, you painted it so well! regards,sandra

  • I think I have cracked a rib the thought of you free running across the rooftops trying to deprive seagulls of their sleep hilarious ..... You have forgotten one major flaw in your plan ... I am convinced seagulls have the memory of an elephant and the aim of an Olympic archery gold medalist and by the time you slid down the roof to your flat after your nocturnal escapade I would bet they will have covered every window in your flat in seagull poo... They do it to me every time I put anything out in the garden sun lounger, chair ... I look to the skies see its clear go in get a drink, or tablets or book. And no matter if it's literally seconds I come out and my chair has been splattered and there are a group of seagulls on the garage roof smirking. If you do ever manage to catch one in your flat and subject it to nights of sleeplessness please post photo so I can smirk. Xx

  • I love the idea of the seagulls smirking! sandra

  • Hiya i have moved 5 times in a year so far.and will be on move again on 6 months too.beutiful area but too snobby for us and too quiet.

    We too get the seagulls day/ nite with there constant chattering.

    Does your head in.

    We feel like travellers now dont like it bt have no choice.

    Its nice where u live.x

  • Hi Moffy I enjoyed reading that it made me chucle x x x

  • EAR PLUGS!!BL**DY seagulls,ha ha ,have fun in your new home,Sandy.

  • I'm still giggling at the thought of your anti-seagull night-time ninja activities

    Julie xx

  • Me too, best to make them your friends and not your enemys tho or you'll have the same trouble as Eviledna lol

    Hope you'll be happy in your new home xx

  • Bless you in your new home. I will forever picture you keep ing the gulls awake now. :)

    I am just 4 months here in Swansea Harbour. Strange being in a flat after 17 years but so great to see the harbour out of window and mountains from balcony. There is a small gated garden that leads on to the harbour too

    I have seagull protection for a little while yet. A young pigeon crashed onto my balcony just over 2 weeks back. Looks like their nest was attacked as he was too young to be flying. He screeches mad if anything comes near ha. We're waiting for his tail feathers to grow back enough for him to fly off and care for himself. They do poo so much though eww :/ xx

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