Was having a good day!!!! not now!!!!!

[sara69]

Was having a fairly good day until my daughter just told me her dad said earlier that he is fed up of waiting on me hand and foot!! I dont know whether to be angry or upset xx

[squidley]

Sara that is a terrible thing to say, perhaps he is just tired and said it in the heat of the moment don't get yourself all upset calm down and then ask your husband is that how he feels. When he sees how upset you are I hope he will apologise we all need to work together and help each other deal with this awful condition. I am sending you gentle hugs and hope everything works out for you love Violet

[fleurmp in reply to squidley]

That's not good to hear. Maybe you should talk to him and see how he feels, perhaps you need to both agree on tasks etc so he doesn't feel like he's shouldering all the work. It could be that he needs a break. We have a rule in our house that jobs get done by whoever is up to it. If neither of us are, it doesn't get done. Unfortunately both of us have chronic conditions, so we've learned to turn a blind eye.

[sara69 in reply to fleurmp]

Yes Fleurmp maybe we need to agree on tasks and involve the rest of the family in the discussion I am going away to a caravan with my daughter and her partner and girls for 2 weeks on saturday so hubby is staying home alone to get a break from me ...much needed for both of us i think xx gentle hugs to you and your partner xxx

[fleurmp in reply to sara69]

That sounds like an ideal opportunity for a well earned break. For goodness sake pace yourself though, it's easy to get carried away when children are involved with all the boundless energy they seem to have. I'm sure you and your husband will sort it out. I'm feeling a bit below at the moment, really tired. Luckily I don't work on Fridays so I can have a rest then, xx gentle hugs to you too.

[sara69 in reply to squidley]

Thank you Violet.. I will ask him tomorrow and I think you might be right about him being tired..we have a full house atm and he seems to be doing alot of tidying up after everyone not just caring for me! Thanks for the gentle hugs xx

[charose]

Ah, that's tough - I must admit my husband is quite upfront when he feels like he's being put on and will say. Though generally he is amazing, especially in the mornings when I can barely lift my head off the pillow or lift a glass to take my pain meds. As Fleurmp says though - we both agree when things can wait and when things need doing. Hope you get it sorted xx

[sara69 in reply to charose]

Thanks Charose, Maybe thats why i got so upset cos usually he is amazing :/ I wish he was more upfront with his feelings like your hubby but dont think he will change now lol I think we all need to sit and talk ..Thanks again xx

[Jeannie]

Bless you I know how that feels!!! It is very hurtful but try and rise above it, I know it's hard but try and empathise - hubby is perhaps cream crackered!! Tell him how much u appreciate what he does and u know how it is for " everyone". Perhaps show him the " spoon theory" as a way of getting him to understand your pain and frustration. You can either google it or search on this site sorry I don't know how to do the link.

Good luck

Gentle hugs

Jeannie xxxx

[sara69 in reply to Jeannie]

Thanks Jeannie I think you are right he is very tired.. I read abut the spoon theory the other day after somebody else on here suggested it...I cannot believe how apt it is maybe I will print it off for him to read while I am on holiday. Maybe I should tell him how much I appreciate him more as well....I really cannot be easy to live with lol ...Gentle hugs to you too xxxx

[Ginsing]

Every one has made such good suggestions. I wonder if he was having a bad day we all do and I know when I looked after my husband a few years ago I felt like throwing the towel in many times - but I think he was probably just venting his frustration it is so hard for every one - all the best x gins