DV and fibro?

[Julsie]

How many of you have or are going through domestic violence and think that may be the cause??

[Marilyn22]

I have been through DV and I’m sure it was the trigger for me.

[Julsie in reply to Marilyn22]

Thank you for your reply. I also think it was the years of abuse that has brought this horrific condition on.

[Marilyn22 in reply to Julsie]

If you ever want to chat….

[sore_and_sad]

I went through serious DV and had to flee - within a few years I was diagnosed with Fibro. I definitely think the 2 are realated and that the trauma triggered the fibro.

[Julsie in reply to sore_and_sad]

Thank you for your reply. I think that dv was a trigger for me as well.

[Tillywoohoo]

I believe going through a very long relationship which was controlling and abusive contributed to my fibromyalgia I also think Covid was the final nail

I have suffered severe pain and fatigue for years during my relationship. I then caught Covid and my symptoms have worsened since then

[Julsie in reply to Tillywoohoo]

Thank you for your reply. Mine was the same, around 18 years before I managed to escape it. I lost my dad in 2020 then mum in 2021 and my fibro has spiralled out of control.

[E3178]

Childhood trauma and then years of dv I think certainly attributed to my fibro

[Julsie in reply to E3178]

Same here. I had some bad traumas as a child and then went into a Volatile relationship which lasted 20 years. I really believe that there is some connection between the two. Thanks for your reply. Big gentle hugs xx

[Emk68]

Hi Julsie I was in a violent relationship, from the age of 17-29, I also had to deal with the death of my stepson(15) then not long after my dad was diagnosed with bowel/stomach cancer and given 6 weeks to live, he lasted 4weeks, a few mths later found out the violent ex was having an affair so I ended it, then my brother was diagnosed with lung cancer he was 39 when he died, then my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer a couple of years later, so I had trauma after trauma, and fibromyalgia was there way back in the 90s but at that time it wasn’t affecting my day to day life and carry on, then in 2017 I lost my job I was 49 things steadily got worse, I had to declare myself bankrupt then found out some spiteful person maliciously reported me for benefit fraud ( I was found not guilty) and was being investigated that went on for almost 3 years,I even contemplated killing myself, it was that investigation that escalated my fibromyalgia, my life still isn’t the same I don’t go anywhere, I can’t work and classed as disabled. It was horrendous that dwp and my local council were given information for a witness almost 2 years and did nothing until 1 week before my trial at crown court! which through the case out of court, I wrote to both bodies sent copies off the cps & my solicitor stating the outcome and wanting to be reimbursed for stopped money and refunded for the extra council tax I was made to pay, I had to get onto my local councillor to get refunded off council tax and have my housing account amended which was sorted, now you would think that’s it but the other day I was checking my universal credit account as we are due to be paid and I find a deduction of £127.47 for housing benefit recovery! it’s over 2 years since I was declared not guilty (3/03/2020) so I’m having another flare up from head to toe, I rang my housing they have nothing showing, I rang u/c, spoke to a rude agent and was told to ring a different number which I did, I spoke to a woman who could barely speak English, she didn’t understand me nor I her, she told me she would speak to her manager and get back to me, this was Monday had nothing, I’ve left about 4 messages on my u/c journal- nothing. I really have not got the energy to have to go through it all again, because of lack of communication between departments & incompetence of these departments. Sorry for the long reply and rant x

[honeybug in reply to Emk68]

OMGOODNESS Emk68🤗🤝❤️‍🩹

I’m soooo very sorry you have endured all of this.

My heart goes out to you and you have my empathy as I also have had a similar life history.

All of the stress and trauma deeply affects our conditions.

When we’re alone in an endless battle against what seems like the World against us it leaves emotional wounds that never heal.

I just said a special prayer for you sweetie.

Any time you wish to chat you can PM me and I will listen and give you my shoulder to cry on.

Sending you the warmest hug positive thoughts my friendship and my love.

Best wishes for for better and successful times from now on.

Love and prayers sweetie.

EvaJo aka EJ

🤗♥️🥰🙏🕊🌿🌸🦋🤝❤️‍🩹

[Emk68 in reply to honeybug]

hi honey bug, I’m sorry I haven’t replied earlier, my head is all over the place, I’m still not sorted with council & dwp, i have contacted a solicitor about a week ago and waiting to be contacted, I am at rock bottom and now im agoraphobic, I rang u/c a couple of weeks ago I was really struggling to try and give a brief outline, he kept laughing and I was on the verge of breaking down crying, he told me to ring debt management as soon as I put the phone down I broke down. Between those 2 governing bodies they have destroyed my life, I’ve missed and cancelled hospital, dotors, the lot, I will never get over it. So I will see if I have a case to su them and if so I’m doing it. Thank you for your kind words, love&peace xxx

[honeybug in reply to Emk68]

Dearest Emk68 🤝♥️🤗

🦋💕🦋💕🦋💕🦋💕🦋

Big comforting hugs sent your way. OMGOODNESS….I’m again so very sorry about your plight.

🌀♦️🌀♦️🌀♦️🌀♦️🌀

I’m across the pond and things over here are different however there are patient advocates that will help when it’s impossible for us to resolve things. Is there such a provision for you there when there is no resolve?

🌈💦🌈💦🌈💦🌈💦🌈💦

No need to apologize to me love for delay in replying. I’ve been through the mill myself since pandemic started so I truly understand.

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

I think you have a good case to sue whomever has put you under such duress.

🙏🕊🙏🕊🙏🕊🙏🕊🙏

Oh I feel so badly for you over your agoraphobia. My brother had it badly. For years he couldn’t leave my parents house. Do you have a special friend that can help you during this trying time???

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

I just said a special prayer for you sweetie.

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Try to hold on to your inner strength…help will come. Don’t give up or in…those who mock or ignore your pleas want you to fail sooooo prove them wrong.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Write down all you’d like to say in all future conversations. If in person reach them the your notes/letter. Or read it yourself if it’s a phone conversation. This way you won’t be prone to forgetting what you need to say.

💠💠💠💠💠💠💠💠💠💠

Remember you are special important worthy of your best life possible and precious.

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

I’m here for you my sweet friend.

EJ 🤝🤗♥️🥰🙏🕊🌿🌸🦋

[Julsie in reply to Emk68]

I’m sorry this has happened to you. It Sounds like you have had such a bad time. My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2018, so between taking him to Christie’s, caring for him, For my kids and working part time my fibro got worse. My dad passed away October 20, I was/is heartbroken. My fibro flared worse. Then my mum passed June 21. I’m in constant pain, both physically and mentally. But when I think back, I can recall around the time I started with it was after the last severe beating my x partner administered on me. I escaped him, but I think the damage was done. I kept in contact with him because we had 2 children together. When I moved into my new house after being in a dv hostel for a year he turned up with all his stuff and moved himself in. The man terrified me. 1 look would have me shrinking into myself, keeping the peace for my kids sake. Fast forward 4 years I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. The physical abuse had stopped but his mental abuse had gotten worse. It took every ounce of myself to get rid of him for good when my daughter was 6. The lads hated him and the way he treated me. I didn’t want her growing up thinking it was normal so he had to go, even though I feared for my life. He’s still been on the sidelines ever since, making comments, making his presence felt at holidays and birthdays. But my children are older now. 24,18 & 14. I’ve had enough so I’ve told them I want nothing more to do with him. They see him on his ‘turf’ he’s not welcome on mine. I’ve took myself off any group chats that he’s on. I’m hoping I can finally get some mental peace and maybe 🤞🏼 start to heal. Sorry about the rambling, my fibro fog is really bad. So it’s a bit discombobulated 😂

Big hugs to you, hope you get it sorted and then relax xx

[2048artist]

I definitely think my relationship with a narcissist triggered my fibromyalgia. I was doing much better after 15 years until I started a relationship that added nothing but stress after 6 months. It’s been proven that abuse can cause auto immune problems and fibro. Our bodies can’t tolerate anything that harms the nervous system.

[Julsie in reply to 2048artist]

I feel your pain. I hope you managed to get rid of your abuser and are starting on your road to recovery again. I’m a coeliac which has caused all kinds of trauma to my body/system as I was undiagnosed for years. I was told I had ibs, a nervous stomach, it was all in my head amongst other things. It wasn’t until I took it in my own hands and diagnosed myself that I found the answer to 1 of my problems. I sat in the doctors office and refused to move until he had made me an appointment for blood tests. He scoffed at me, said “not to ‘self diagnose’, the internet is a dangerous thing” I made sure I went back to him for the results, but never again after that 😂

I had much the same treatment by doctors with the fibro, they put it down to my coeliac amongst other things and I had to fight for a diagnosis. I was happy when I got 1. I thought, now I can get treatment and it will be gone 😂. Yeah, naive of me.

I’m surprised they have not done any kind of studies on this. Or maybe they have and I’ve not seen it. Many doctors don’t even believe it’s a thing. I wish they could walk in our shoes for a day. 😈

[Hidden]

I thankfully have not but i witnessed dv on a horrendous level as a child and it definitely effected my brain and I do believe it's because of my childhood I have fibromyalgia trauma and abuse effects the brain xx

[Emk68]

Thank you all xxx love&peace xxx