I haven't been on here for a long while! I really miss the support.
For the last couple of months I have been trying to get my life in order and concentrate on me and my family and the work situation. I didn't have much energy to concentrate on to many things.
My sister had been hospitalised and my mother is suffering with other health problems and a death on my partners side of the family. It all happens at once doesn't it?
I have been coping (just about) and tried to just get on with things. Unfortunately this last week has been horrific and i've tried to hid the pain I have been in. I am extremely upset with work, as all I have done is try my best and been killing myself in the process. Last week I has a meeting and was told that basically, if I cannot go faster (even though i'm doing my job 100% correct) I will be moved and have to start all over again. I know there isn't any more options for me concerning work, so I could be let go. The same thing that I was facing before I went back to work. I feel like my efforts were for nothing.
I have also been to the doctors again and again. Still nothing, other than being told I need an eye test again. Even though I have had 3! What good is that diagnosis Fibro? which all doctors agree is the diagnosis but will not diagnose me with?
Honestly feel like giving up altogether but I know that is very silly, so I won't. I have been wondering how everyone is. I wish this could of been a nicer message but unfortunately it really is not.
Love me x
Written by
CushMonkey
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I am so genuinely sorry to read that and I sincerely hope that you can find the answers that you so desperately desire and deserve. I was wondering if you have told your GP that you have been for three eye tests? And what does he hope to achieve by a fourth?
I am also so sorry to read about your work situation, and I wish I had an answer that could actually help you but I am so sorry but I don't. The only consolation that I can afford you is that if work get rid of you then you may find it easier to claim benefits? They may even be willing to give you a payout and a letter for the DWP regarding your illness?
I want to genuinely and sincerely wish you all the best of luck, as you have tried so hard to give up now.
Life is hard and not fair. Be kind to yourself and we will get through it the best way we can.
Hi CushMonkey
It appears to be that we always end up feeling disappointed and frustrated after trying so hard to acheive certain goals. There are usually some positives to find though! For instance you have discovered a few things about your tolerances and baselines, how much of certain things you can do. We don't need to be working to get these answers and your post tells me that maybe working is something to put on hold just now and to concentrate on balancing your pain first.
Do you keep a journal of your symptoms and pain? These can be useful when trying to get a diagnosis because it's easier for you and your doc to see patterns of things etc, such as when your pain is really high or really low what type of thing were you doing at that time etc,.
Hope you can recharge your confidence and try again, sending healing supportive fluffies for you {{{{{{ CushMonkey }}}}}}
Thank you for your kind responses. I would try concentrating on myself and dealing with my pain more but unfortunately without my job I won't be able to cope with just day to day, as I desperately need that small amount of money.
I have kept food and pain journals the doctors do not seem to want to see them due to the 7 minute deadline in my surgery.
Due to my circumstances I actually 'don't apply' for benefits even if I was to lose my job. As I don't technically own a house or pay rent. My partner earns above the pay barrier by like £3 and without a diagnosis they cantt put me in a band. I am literally in the cracks sitting in limbo land.
I know I will eventually just get on with it and sort it the best I can, just right now I feel like I could sleep and rest for a month. So drained, So much pain, so much pressure.
I'm so grateful for the support everyone has given on here and I truly love you all to bits!
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Trip No. 2 To The Doctors ...
Trying to feel more positive
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