people

[tulips123]

new years' eve, my b.day & i have reached the grand old age of 52. the older i get, not saying i feel old, the less i understand other people. the urge to lock my doors,disconnect the phone, apart from a small circle of very close family/friends, i dont want to know anymore. everything you try to do, always trouble, hassle, obnoxious people whose main aim in life appears to be to make things as difficult as possible for everyone else. i do not have the energy or the inclination to keep fighting them.

I wish everyone here a happy, healthy, prosperous 2014. Perhaps for many of us on here, it can only get better!

[Fibrofoggiest]

Wow tulips, great to see you, it seems like ages since you've been around! I certainly understand how you feel, I am approaching 51 in March, yet like you it's not the getting older that worries me exactly, it is the way people are so intolerant of others and one can see the world falling about one. I'm sure many generations have felt exactly the same, and the world has gone ticking on, but as you say, people are so driven by money, what they have, and their own insular world, they don't take time out to think of others at all and everything is done in such a rush, I think they miss life as such properly. I try to lead my life as do to others as you would like done to you, to me that seems to be a good idea, sometimes it doesn't work, but I still plug away, in the hope that I can make even just a tiny difference to others,

I am sending you loads of positive vibes to last you the whole year

Foggy x

[tulips123 in reply to Fibrofoggiest]

evening foggy. obviously you know where i'm coming from! i am aware that @ times there is such a long run on ignorant, uncaring and arrogant people, it feels like that's all there is, but things move on and change. it makes me feel good when i can help someone too. between you and me, i think i am getting little bit scared the more disabled and helpless i become. scary to have to rely so much on other people who dont get 'pay back', ie. dont feel good about having helped someone else. @ the moment i'm getting so much of this in so-called 'services'. people paid £ to 'care' but dont, or cant. perhaps that is also their tragedy.

Now i've had my rant, i'll concentrate on those positive vibes of yours. thank you, and all the best to you for 2014! tulip xx

[Fibrofoggiest in reply to tulips123]

Aww thank you and you are very very welcome

Foggy x

[tulips123 in reply to Fibrofoggiest]

sweet dreams xx

[Cookie72]

Hi tulips, yes it's not a great world anymore is it, I turned 72 last September and have seen many changes, not all for the best I might add, I'm just glad I lived in the era that have , ..happy new year to you too tulips, don't let the morons get you down too much, just stay on here with us and enjoy, together we will try to put the world to rights lol..gentle hug...Dee xx

[tulips123 in reply to Cookie72]

yes i will, need to to retain some sanity! thank you, tulip xx

[Ginsing]

Happy Birthday Tulip I do hope you had/have a marvelous. day. I do so agree with Foggy when she days lead your life by the "Do as You Would be done By " Rule. Take time out to think of others it always makes you feel a heap better if you do.

I faced 51 a way back and to be honest I feel no different inside now as I did then. Our spirits and our Joi de Vivre does not go even though our bodies let us down. Happy Birthday xgins

[tulips123 in reply to Ginsing]

hi gins, totally agree, helping peeps along the way etc. always makes for good feelings all round. sadly, i've had a long run of too many people who clearly have no idea of this concept. even more so seem to get their good feelings out of the opposite! my family tell me i always hit this down patch this time of year. chronologically speaking, i have no probs reaching 52, indeed there have been times when this would have seemed unlikely! 52, it's just a number. regardless of the condition of my physical body, as cheesy as it may sound, it does not define who i am. i am much aware the problems i get @ this time of year comes back to having too much time to think. joi de vivres returns with better weather, easier to get out. he ho, the cycle of life rolls on. best to you for 2014. i get the feeling your disability is on a similar level to mine. have huge respect for you gins, the steady way you manage to support so many people on here for so long! i do get a lot out of feeling i've helped peeps, but your staying power is really impressive!

tulip xx

[sue32]

My God tulips! That sounded exactly how I feel!! I'm 56 and have become so intolerant of people and things. Maybe it's to do with the fibro, but I just keep to a few good friends and family members, and I'm quite happy to just sit at home and watch TV!! XX

[tulips123 in reply to sue32]

not just me then sue! do you feel it's you being intolerant, or too many people 'out there' have very little humanity, dont actually care about others, even those paid £ to do so? family/friends are not a problem for which i am most grateful, but society in general? I spent xmas in hospital, almost empty wards which i've never seen before. this is just an example, perhaps i'm too sensitive, but an HCA said to me, "now rid of the iv you might want to get in the shower? hint taken, not offended, very happy to do so. then she snapped @ me "i'm not helping you & you cant take the oxygen with you without supervision" ! i'm also desperately looking for a dentist. tried NHS Direct, online - the phone! dont get me started!. i'm not rude, so why is it ok to be rude to me?

Anyway, thank god for tv & the internet! you can find people to talk to you would never imagine before, and i've discovered i really do like shopping, it was the hoards of people trying to walk through me that i hated! ok, perhaps it is me, i'm the one who is intolerant of humanity! Sue, happy 2014. xx

[sue32 in reply to tulips123]

tulips! I think society in general is less tolerant of others. And I think once we reach a certain age we're no longer worried about what others think, and we're not afraid to speak out. I know I'm not. Some years ago I would have avoided walking through a gang of young people. Now I walk straight through them, but I have to say, if I'm respectful to them they're quite nice people. But if I saw them misbehaving I wouldn't think twice about telling them!

I too have made some great friends on the internet. It's true, it must be that we're all of the same mind!! XX

[tulips123 in reply to sue32]

ditto - every word. xx tulip

[Hidden]

Hi Tulips you right my feelings so perfectly hunny

Its not an age thing I'm only 40 and am exactly the same. Politeness and manners cost nothing neither does a smile but people don't appear to understand that anymore

I can't be bothered with people as a rule which has contributed to some friends leaving me but they had nothing to say worth listening to and I would find myself wishing they'd leave............ I came across as being rude, obnoxious and unsociable and got myself a label which then spread.

The fact I close my door on them is because they cause me stress and I'm not allowed to have stress in my life and I prefer the quiet, noise hurts me all over the type of pain that makes you cry Why would I put myself through that? so I choose not to. My OH at first disliked me for my attitude but has since developed a very good understanding of how fibro affects me now luckily!!

I've been there for all of them but none of them could bring themselves to return the favour but to cause me social pain to a point where I didn't know who was a friend or not anymore. Its crap being stuck in the house but also fantastic it is my safe haven so only the people I actually like, trust and respect get through the door LOL

Boy! didn't mean to go on that much

I'm still the caring sharing and loving person I've always been just very picky about who with these days

Hope your birthday was a good one Tulips and clink clink of glasses as you are most definitely not alone

Special fluffies infused with birthday giggles and healing powers for you

xxxsianxxx

[tulips123 in reply to Hidden]

you are a brave woman, i think many people put up with stuff 'cause prospect of being alone is too scary. it's only in recent years that the penny dropped for me. strong sense of freedom in making your own choices, putting your own needs 1st, then see who your friends really are! i am gradually calming down this evening. it's good to talk to peeps who feel the same. tulip xx

[Hidden in reply to tulips123]

Thankyou it was a very difficult and upsetting time for me and I followed the process of working people out. It was a nervous breakdown that got me doing it as the stress was going to kill me if I didn't do something

Its always sad when making these choices but I don't regret it because now I don't care what they think anymore or what they're saying behind my back

Illness has a lot to answer for

fluffies xxxsianxxx

[tulips123 in reply to Hidden]

the illness is horrendous, but now you know the truth about those who turned on you and they cant hurt you anymore, they dont matter! they can get on with their petty lives, what you have left is quality, not quantity. good for you. took me a long time to work that out. we're the good guys, support and be there for each other as much as possible. take care sian, thanks for the 'chat'. tulip xx