We have unexplained infertility and have been TTC since 2021. We have had 2 failed embryo transfers, the last being 7 months ago in August. I have phoned every month since then to get booked in for FET but every time they say there's no space, the latest being yesterday. We did manage to get a space last month and started a natural FET cycle but it was aborted midway through because they missed the peak lining (they only had me in every 4 days).How are you all keeping positive? I just feel like I'm in limbo and can't enjoy things the way I used to because I'm forever waiting. I feel very drained from the process and wonder what is the point to all the supplements, healthy eating, increased exercise etc etc. Any words of positivity, tips, or success stories similar to my situation would be very much appreciated please, I need some positivity!
Tips on staying positive: We have... - Fertility Network UK
Tips on staying positive
Sorry to hear about last month, that would have been disappointing having waited so long. In terms of how you’re feeling, I’ve been there too. At one point I felt our journey was all that was going on in our life and life was therefore kinda passing us by. We decided to stop avoiding booking a night out for dinner or short trip away, although knew we’d cancel them if it ended up clashing with our treatment. It’s done us the world of good the last year and a half xx
Awww 😔sorry you have had this, sending u positive vibes. I don't understand when you say they have no space, are they allowed to say that? is it NHS or private? If it is private funded, I'd be complaining that u have had a few times with no space..the 2 clinics I've been with, UK under NHS and Greek Private- have never experienced this but as its so time dependant on your cycle I wonder why they are saying that. Anyway sorry, tips for positive, I am on 3rd transfer and in the dreaded wait for test results etx, but as the other person has said on this occasion, I've booked a trip to theatre and enjoyed it and booked a weekend away- so u feel like u can enjoy life again and be doing "normal things". hope u get booked in soon, definitely question them on the space thing tho x
Really sorry you feel rather down at the moment. Please know that it's totally normal at this point of time. I felt the same after the second failed FET but believe or not, time will heal you and or you need to do is to make sure you take a good care of yourself. Sounds like it is NHS for your treatment? All I can say is the clinic plays a critical role in this journey. The journey is challenging enough and you definitely need someone to fully support you along the way. Sending you hugs and positive vibes❤️
really sorry you’re feeling down at the moment. This journey is not an easy one. You have to remind yourself of the positives ( sounds like you have some more embryos and you can get pregnant by yourself!) and how many women end up with a positive even to their journey. It’s definitely easier said than done.
I’m shocked to hear that the clinic doesn’t have space for you. I’ve been at both NHS and private clinics and haven’t heard of this. I mean the NHS clinic has told me a couple of times before that they don’t have availability for the ‘nurse consultation’ ahead of my next cycle before and I’ve just insisted on them finding a spot because I don’t want to miss the cycle.
Unfortunately you have to really really advocate for yourself on this journey and ask a lot of questions from my experience.
Did they explain to you why your last FET could have failed?
it’s terrible they missed your lining and scan you so infrequently. You can ask and insist on being scanned more frequently. Did they check your progesterone levels at all before transfer? Again, I would insist on them doing so.
Have you had a saline sonogram to check everything in the uterus looks fine? If not, I would insist they do.
Wishing you all the best!
If you’re looking into doing more investigations privately you can look into your NK and cytokines as well as your uterine microbiome.
I am so sorry to hear about your journey and how the clinic has been acted so poorly, no space for FET and a missing peak should not happen and I completely agree with what has already been said, we need to learn how to advocate for ourselves.
Every step of this journey is so challenging but I remember that after my first failed transfer I wrote in this chat and I received a message that I still cherish: sometimes you don't need to be positive, sometimes you just need to breathe....
We have been TTC since 2023 and last year I felt completely lost, with no place to go to find a bit of peace or hope, but it was clear in my mind that I didn't want to stay there and I refused to let this journey take over my entire life: you deserve to enjoy every little things in your life and I think all the supplements and exercise you are doing are still worthy because they are making you a healthier person, something that you will always bring with you.
I don't know if this can be of any help, but I found that listening to the podcast Element Fertility Yoga opened a different world to me: listening to other stories, majority positives, different perspective and more information (microbiome, DNA frag, etc..) was a big relief and I felt less lonely...Fertility yoga is giving me a massive help to keep grounded to reality, to learn how to breathe through difficulties, and how to find hope in the possibility.. We have decided to TTC naturally for a while with the help of a Fertility Naturopath and, while I am still in the unknown, I am in a completely different place compared to last year, with my life back in my hands.
Sending you a big hug x
sorry to hear this - but what you are expressing is how I’ve felt - and still feel sometimes too. It is a lot to carry. I also have unexplained infertility which for me I find is hard to accept as it’s so uncertain. I think it’s totally normal to feel this way. If you could change it, you would. I know with supplements I feel like I’m personally keeping pregnacare sales up haha
Things that have helped me - talking therapy, and being busy.
Is there something you want to do that you’ve been putting off? Even just a little thing - I avoided buying new jeans for ages in case I got pregnant. Silly I know. But buying a pair that fitted made me feel good.
An extreme thing we did was get a puppy! We always wanted to add a dog to our family of 2 and we did it. I always planned to do when our child was a bit older…but here we are. (He’s a lot of work but so loving - so a great focus for me)
A friend of mine who navigated cancer (not that same!) said - for her “plans are fluid” and that really struck a chord with me.
Take care sounds like you are in the thick of it right now.
Ideas of staying sane in the 2ww
*sensitive*positive test...
Need a break - how do you stay well and positive?
Feeling down and frustrated today :-)
Absolutely heartbroken
