Multiple pregnancy announcements at work?

[Hopefulsibling2]

Does anyone have any 'situations' with their work?!

Vvvv long story, but I've worked for my boss for 15 years next month (I'm office manager for an Architect- SME about 10 employees) so he knows all about my IVF history back from 2017... fortunately I told him in January we were going to try another FET, told him the test result was positive... likely/hopeful due date of early October (couple of weeks after my 40th birthday). I had 9 months off with my son in 2018/2019, during which time my boss really struggled without me - he relies on me FAR too much - so he is quite apprehensive and not looking forward to the same again...

To add - my boss is a 75 year old male, very much 'old school' way of thinking. No HR department, just me, him, my part time admin assistant, and 7 members of drawing staff.

I have recently found out that a colleague - 24 year old, just moved in with her (new-ish) boyfriend last summer, got a puppy just before Christmas, is now pregnant and due about 5 days after me.. she also knew about me going for an FET (in fact, the whole company did.. I am v open!) she is yet to tell any of us, other than my assistant, who in turn told me.

Furthermore, a male colleague has just told me his wife is due with their second (20 month age gap) about 2 weeks before me.. also yet to tell the boss.

I am SO GLAD the boss knows about my situation.. but equally, these other two cases are not going to go down well with him.

Ultimately, no-one has done anything wrong, but, being a small company, and my boss being so 'old school' it's going to be tricky.. plus, he is likely to come and talk/vent to me about it all when he finds out. URGH!

And then of course, because of the crazy things infertility can do to our minds, I can't help having the thoughts of 'why can't this be my moment to shine' why did they have to get pregnant so quickly and easy to over-complicate things.

Sorry for the ramble but hoping someone else may have/had similar experiences. or any advice!

[Twiglet2]

aww how lovely that you will have other people to talk to about being pregnant and having kids at the same time in such a small company ☺️ my small team (albeit in a large company) was similar with my first and it’s still great being able to chat about them being at the same stages and some of my colleagues are bringing their kids to my oldest bday party in April, which is lovely! Sure one of them isn’t married and wasn’t trying to get pregnant whilst I was 4 years into to treatment when it happened but everyone’s story and struggles are different.

Being old and ‘old school’ isn’t an excuse for your boss to ‘moan’ about people starting and growing their family I’d just be really positive with him about their pregnancies if he tries to moan to you and tell him it’s not something you want to hear from him as you are delighted for them and every baby is a miracle! Focus on your own work and your own handover for maternity leave when the time approaches and don’t let him burst your bubble and hopefully he won’t burst the other people’s either as you are all entitled to a supportive employer, no matter how small the company is or how old the boss is! No matter how and why or how quickly they got pregnant it is life changing for them all and the fact the rumour mill has already started with people telling others their news and they haven’t felt comfortable to tell the boss because of how he might react I feel really sorry for them as he (and everyone else) should be nothing but happy for them if he is any decent kind of employer at all. Distance yourself from anything but positive chats about all the pregnancies (including yours) would be my advice xx

[MBean0813 in reply to Twiglet2]

I couldn't have said anything better than this...

[Hopefulsibling2 in reply to MBean0813]

Thank you Twiglet2 and MBean0813 deep down I completely agree with everything you've said... I just need to think more like it! Thank you both, I appreciate you taking the time to reply! xx

[Twiglet2 in reply to Hopefulsibling2]

Your feelings are totally valid lovely 🥰 and it’s easier to say it and see the things I’ve said when the dust settles a bit but any issues is defo on him and not your burden to take or worry about xx