Early pregnancy loss, looking for hope x

Hello all,

I'm feeling so low today and wondering if anyone has stories of hope. Has anyone had very low odds of IVF, but gotten pregnant naturally or experienced a loss after IVF and then naturally conceived?

I'm 6wks+5 and yesterday I had my first scan to check whether my IVF pregnancy was viable. Unfortunately it's not. They saw a small gestational sac and a yolk sac but no fetal pole. My yolk sac also appeared very small, smaller than they would have liked at this stage. I've not experienced any pain or bleeding at all. In fact, I had very little pregnancy symptoms at all but strong positive pregnancy test results. My IVF clinic believe this means I'll go into miscarriage in the coming days. They said sometimes a pregnancy can be a little bit behind but they are 99% sure mine won't progress so aren't offering a rescan, however they want me to stay on cyclogest until my local hospital (EPAU) see me tomorrow and then we'll go from there with what happens next.

I am broken, my partner and I both are. We'll not be doing any more IVF cycles due to the cost of it and will try naturally going forward. My odds were so low to begin with and with my age (39), low AMH, endometriosis, a blocked fallopian tube and a potential fibroid, I'm not sure it'll ever happen for us. They retrieved 3 eggs, only 1 fertilised and that little one implanted, I was so happy when I got my BFP. We've been in absolute pieces the past day, but something is keeping me hopeful (or maybe naive, I don't know).

[Mercury363]

I didn't want to scroll through this and not comment. I am so sorry this is your story. Ivf is so cruel and most of us have experienced what you are gonig through, some of us get a happy ever after and some not. Sometimes no rhyme or reason and it's all totally unfair.My last ec we got nothing and decided to stop. I would have continued but my husband didn't want to go through another round of egg collections and possibly nothing to show for it. The money, travelling to Spain and general life toll is huge. We got lucky for our bfp once and he's fantastic but my heart wanted that sibling. I don't think it will ever stop but I will have to live with it

Take some time, enjoy each other and who knows what life has in store for you both. Some women on this forum have had huge odds stacked against them and still got bfps naturally. I wish you luck with whatever happens. Try and be kind to yourself x

[Hidden in reply to Mercury363]

Thank you so much for sharing your journey. You're right. This is such a cruel journey. Everytime I had a bit of hope, it was quickly trashed. Starting the journey gave me hope, only to be told my body wasn't responding to maximum dose stims, then egg collection came and they manages to get 3 eggs, only 1 fertilised, so back to being on edge. That little one held on and became a blastocyst so we had a day 5 fresh transfer and the TWW was a killer, I ended up caving and testing early but for ages my tests were faint until closer to OTD it became a really strong dark positive, and now this. It's so difficult to make sense off and accept. I'm really trying but I'm struggling. Tomorrow, I speak to my local EPAU and I'll take it from there but we are both utterly broken, totally crushed at the news of pregnancy loss. I'm yet to miscarry. I'm guessing that will begin when I stop the cyclogest pessaries. I hate that we have to go through this xx

[Giggy1989]

Hi Lovely - I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s a rotten journey to begin with and to add that on top is just heartbreaking. I’ve had success conceiving naturally after many rounds of IVF and low AMH. May I ask what supplements you’re on to boost your egg quality/AMH? I can share what my clinic suggested. I know you mentioned being unable to afford another round of IVF, but I also wanted to share that my first round was a total failure. We didn’t get a single embryo. However on my second we got three, one of which is now my son. I do think that the first round is sadly a bit of a ‘pilot’ and they can change your protocol for the next round to hopefully bring you success. It’s super encouraging your first implanted, so if you could just make one better quality embryo on a subsequent round you may have your rainbow baby. Just wanted to share my experience in case you can look at funding from a charity or interest free loan. Sending lots of love

[Hidden in reply to Giggy1989]

Thank you for reaching out. I've taken some time out to process. I'm still pregnant abd waiting for this miscarriage to actually happen. Every day I'm struggling with my emotions. I took Ovum supplements for 8 months before starting the IVF journey. They are a UK based brand abd have taken the learnings from It Starts With The Egg. However, I only really had the 1 egg that matured properly that became a high quality embreyo. It's really unlikely we will do IVF again but I will be taking the following supplements as seperate tablets when we decide to try naturally again:

CoQ10

NAC

R-Alpha Lipoic Acid

Omega 3

Vit D & K2

Vit C

Iron (as I'm low on iron)

Melatonin

Active Folic

[Passby2024]

It sounds like trying naturally would be difficult in your case. Would you consider doing treatments aboard? The costs is about 1/3 of that in the UK and the results in my case are also better. 39 is still a good age for IVF and you don’t wait to come back in a couple of years to try again when your chances will be much lower. PM me if you want to know more about my experiences.

[nat55zt]

This is so cruel. I am so sorry about your loss and situation. I would suggest you look into IVF in Slovakia, Slovenia and Czech Republic. It is very cheap compared to Great Britain or even Greece and Northern Cyprus. EU rules apply so it is highly professional and also safe.

[Christianbaby]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It’s just so unfair, and my heart goes out to you. I hope you have support around you- be gentle with yourself. ❤️

[Hidden in reply to Christianbaby]

Thank you for your kind words. It's been really traumatic and devastating for us both. I still haven't miscarried yet so waking up knowing I'm still pregnant is heartbreaking. I don't feel like i can heal, get closure or move on with this lingering over me. I'm just so so sad right now. Trying to take it a step at a time xx

[Skittles11]

Sorry to hear your news, I know how upsetting it is. I don't know if my situation will help at all but sharing as you asked if anyone had had very low odds of IVF, but gotten pregnant naturally or experienced a loss after IVF and then naturally conceived. This is basically what happened to me. If you look on my profile you'll see I went through several rounds of IVF, I had several losses. I also have low ovarian reserve and endometriosis. After several rounds of IVF and pretty much deciding to try with donor eggs, i got pregnant naturally at age 38. I have been trying for 6 years. I now have a son who is nearly 5 weeks old. I never thought I'd be in this situation as I felt like it only happened for other people.

Take good care x

[Hidden in reply to Skittles11]

Wow what a journey you've had!! Isn't it cruel that you have to get to the point of giving up on your body for then it to finally work. The mental and emotional strain that must have had on you. I'm soooo pleased to hear it all worked out for you in the end. Thank you for sharing your experience with me 🙏🏼❤️ it is really helpful to hear stories of hope xx

[Kitkat10]

I’m sorry, I experienced an empty sac at my 7 week scan. They didn’t do a follow up scan but they did do 2 HCG tests ti confirm that the pregnancy wasn’t progressing.

I found this slightly less distressing than a second scan. It might be worth asking for a blood HCG test 2 days apart. Mine wasn’t increasing as it should and then 2 weeks later was back down to < 5 which confirmed a miscarriage. It’s awful to be in limbo, I’m sorry you are going through this x

[Hidden in reply to Kitkat10]

It's the most cruel thing. Being given that hope then having it ripped away. I have a friend that has been very vocal of never wanting to be a mother, never desiring children. She's just given birth, the day I was told my pregnancy basically died. If only it could be an easy "accident" for all of us girls who are desperate to be mothers 💔

[Kitkat10 in reply to Hidden]

Bless you, it’s so cruel. You will get there, the positive I tried to take from my experience was that the embryo implanted so that part was possible and I just had to wait for the right embryo. It’s a horrible time, I remember it very clearly and the gut wrenching disappointment.

I remember just as I started IVF, covid happened and halted everything and it felt totally bleak, then my work colleague who sat right next to be in the office got pregnant by mistake and went on and on about it. Gosh I really struggled not to break down every single day but I promise that when you get there, and you will, the happiness hugely outweighs the struggles. Hang in there, it’s a terribly tough time but it will get easier xx

[Hidden in reply to Kitkat10]

I'm dreading all of that, pregnancy announcements at work, whenever a baby is born they share it company wide on the intranet channels we have. I've been offered counselling through my IVF clinic and through work. I'm taking on the IVF clinic one and then will see if work can help too.

I still haven't miscarried so I think I'll have to go down the medical route or a D&C. Just want to feel better and have hope again but that's wearing really thin right now.

[Ralphlola]

Hi, first of all I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I had 3 failed rounds of IVF, my last ended with a negative embryo transfer in September 24. I told the clinic I wanted a break until June and then, completely out of the blue, I caught naturally I am now 7 weeks pregnant and it’s all going well so far! I never thought I’d conceive naturally but it did happen! Just hope this helps you stay positive xx