I've spoken to a few IVF contacts about this as I'm so fuming.
Last Friday I had 4 eggs successfully fertilise following EC on Thursday when they took 5 good sized eggs. I'm 43 and responded well to Pergoveris stims. Embryos will be PGTA tested.
I've had NO update from my clinic since last friday, despite other women telling me they got updated on days 1, 3, 5 etc.
Today was day 6 and the doc tried to phone this morning - exactly when I'd advised them Id be at work and unable to take a call.
Now I can't talk to the doc until Friday apparently.
My friend at the same clinic in Spain got regular updates from the embryologist about the development of her embroys.
The clinics admin team have been tricky (disorganised) from the outset which has piled on even more stress - to what is already a stressful process!
Am I right to be really f+++ed off by how I'm being treated?
Yesterday I was a bag of nerves all day and could barely do anything.
Today I've got into a kind of brain numbness where I've resigned myself to it all being a fail and simply having to do another EC.....as this is the only way I can actually function with the day to day.
Advice appreciated.
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Sja1981
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Hmmmm, that does sound a bit naughty. My clinic in London called me the day after egg collection to let me know how many eggs were mature and how many had fertilised. They don’t offer a Day 3 call as standard, but I specifically requested one. The embryologist then called me on Day 5/6 to let me know how many embryos had made it/they were sending for PGT-A testing. That is pretty bad form that they are making you wait until Friday. Can you call them first thing and say that it is imperative that a doctor/embryologist makes contact with you tomorrow? Surely they can at least send you an email with the numbers! Wishing you the very best of luck x
That’s great news that you’ve got 3 blasts that have been sent for PGT-A testing. I carried out two egg collections last year when I was 44. After I got an update from the embryologist on Day 1, she said that they would update me again on Day 5. But she was incredibly understanding when I said that I really needed an update on Day 3. She could see how anxious I was. And I’m so, so glad that I requested that update. I started the week with 16 eggs. By Day 3, it had fallen drastically to 3 embryos. By Day 5, I basically had one embryo to send for PGT-A testing. If I hadn’t had that Day 3 call to soften the blow/manage my expectations, I literally think I would have fainted from shock when I got the Day 5 call. I appreciate that clinics have their ‘protocols’, but they also need to show some compassion towards their patients! x
I'm glad the blow was softened for you. How did your one blast fare? Hope it was a positive outcome. I've no idea about the grading of my 3 yet, I assume it was good enough else they wouldn't have gone for testing?What a rollercoaster this is. X
I've not been so good at times at advocating for myself as the hormones have been so overwhelming and the lack of support from close friends really upsetting. The clinic must think I'm a headcase but then I speak to other women and they've said I'm being too nice/patient and should be pushier?!
I think their protocol is to relay information by phone, hence the delay. I've now finally received an email to say 3 embryos have been sent for PGTA!!! I wish I'd known this on Tuesday!
Terrible treatment I'd be livid. This is the worst waiting time knowing if any have made it. My clinic called me day 1, 2, 3 & 5. I wouldn't be able to cope not knowing.
You're spending a lot of money, phone them and be firm.
Wow the updates you got are brilliant. I had prepared myself for the worst and was even researching what other clinics I'd switch to. All that could have been avoided.
I've had to liaise with the centre manager by email to ask what their standard protocol is as waiting to day 6 when they tried to phone me was the longest wait ever!!! Plus they phoned at exactly the time I said I wouldn't be able to take a call - of course!
I've just got the news about my 3 frozen blasts and it's day 7!!!
I've not been simply angry, more like a feeling of utter defeat and failure thinking that at 43 this simply isn't going to happen!
no that’s terrible! To be honest you dont need the doctor you need the embryologist so maybe you can ask to speak with them? My clinic do ask us to be available at all times for a call and won’t leave voicemails or emails either with results but if you miss a call it’s not days and days u tik you can speak with them! That’s shocking! Xx
My doctor is now claiming that last friday, day 1, he said he would be in contact on day 6. I was driving when he phoned so i guess I didnt hear this vital part! But having you wait 6 days - is that normal? Seems that a lot of other clinics provide far more frequent updates?
Because this is new to me, i dont know what is normal and abnormal to expect?! It's not like I want to be a demanding diva, more that I just want to know wtf is going on! xx
My clinic wasn't particularly great either on that sense, but I think it was our support admin person really. We got emails on day 1 and day 6, same as you, doing pgt testing, I was panicking on fertilization rates by the time I heard from them. I did chase them in between and did not receive response until day 6... Which was appalling. But the results were as good as they could be and now our support person has changed, things are much better as we continue the process. Be a pest to them, and don't hesitate to chase them... You are paying a lot of money for a service, the least they can do is give you an update.
wow you're the only other person i've heard from who also didnt get updated until dat 6 - isnt that a really long time to wait?
i'm with this clinic because my friend recommended, and she got updates on days 1, 3 and 5.
I've just been emailed an update that I have 3 frozen embryos which is fantastic, and not what i expected at all. I'm now waiting 3 weeks is it for the PGTA? How long are you having to wait? I wonder why they wait to day 6 and not day 5. I suppose it allows more time for growth so the embryos are as strong as possible ahead of testing - as the testing brings risks too doesnt it? how do you feel about that? also how old are you? x
We got told we would be hearing from them towards day 5 from the EC. They sent an update on day 1 fertilisation and then day 5/6. I had two EC in the same cycle, it's also true our day 3 was falling in weekend/bank holidays. For the PGT results we had about 3 weeks wait as well, and they told us from the beginning it would be like that. The wait is unbearable, so we got busy with the garden and some traveling to take our minds out of it.
Hold on there, give them feedback on lack of communication... For us, our personal care assistant was the one struggling to keep us informed, and we've now have a new one that is better at responding and communicating promptly.
You will get through this, we are stronger than you think in the midst of it!
I haven’t once heard from a doctor about my embryos. I speak to the doctor for my initial appointment and then after the ivf is finished or if he is doing the egg collection/embryo transfer. In between that I go through the nurses and the embryologist. I imagine if it were my doctor I’d never hear from him as hes incredibly busy. The embryologist gives me updates the day of egg collection, the day after and then day 3 and 5. I don’t know how you could be expected to not know for a week that’s ridiculous.
i think my doctor is making a point of saying that he is doing all the calls/contact to make me feel like i'm getting the best care, but i dont know anything different or have anything to compare my experience with. I would be fine with the embryologist calling me - literally anyone providing an update is better than none. Apparently he told me on day 1 that he was going to update me on day 6, but I missed this bit of info. i was driving and he has a strong spanish accent. Im future, I've told him i'm going to email after important conversations to relay what I've heard, to ensure we are on the same page.
I actually preferred to wait till day 5 and just get one update. If I didn’t do that I was just so nervous the rest of the time waiting for a call. But my clinic asked what my preference was xxx
i thought i was being updated on day 5 because this is standard practice. I hadnt heard about people waiting to day 6, which is what set me off panicking.
It's weird how i'm a fairly calm rational person who is good under pressure, but wow - not when i'm floodded with hormones and doing this process alone, with a clinic abroad. It's not like i can just get in my car and drive to them, if there is an issue.
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Totally gutted
Help , all my embryos have not yet reached the blastocyst stage on day 5
Day 5 transfer
