dealing with infertility

[Wonderland_Ghost]

Hi everyone

Not sure where to start but myself and my partner been dealing with infertility for year and half now. We have been to fertility clinics found out we both got issues but it’s more my partner. I’ve been really struggling to come terms with the possibility of not having children when it’s been something I’ve always wanted and was so excited when me and partner first started trying. I have felt very alone and isolated as lot my friends have got children so it’s something when I talk to them they don’t really understand. Thank you to anyone who has read this

[Elsidee11]

hi Wonderland_Ghost - so sorry, infertility really is so lonely, but what I will say is this forum is amazing ♥️ such wonderful people all with the same dream. Please feel free to ask any questions and I’m sure you’ll have lots of support. Wishing you all the best for what’s next on your journey x

[Wonderland_Ghost in reply to Elsidee11]

Hi thank you for your reply am so glad I came across this forum as I’ve never spoken about my journey and it’s hard to keep it bottled up when it affects me a lot. Sending you lots of love

[Positive20]

Hi. As mentioned on the previous post there is a lot of support you can get from this forum as we have all lived and breathed the same experience. Unfortunately unless you have been through it, people can’t fully appreciate and understand what you have been through. It’s even a difference what you experience as the partner and not the person going through the physical aspect of ivf medication.

I found it helped to have my plan for what we would do if ivf didn’t work. We discussed and agreed on adoption so I always knew there was another plan if this one ended. That helped me and may also help you. Good luck xx

[Wonderland_Ghost in reply to Positive20]

Thank you for opening up about your experience am sorry if too much of a personal question would you say it took a while for your partner be open to adoption? My partner isn’t considering which is hard I definitely don’t want push him as I know he needs time but it’s difficult when I know I could give a child a loving home we both still going through lots of emotions we didn’t expect we would need full IVF when we went to the clinic so we in process of saving as much as we can to go down that option.

[Positive20 in reply to Wonderland_Ghost]

Hi. No not too personal at all. My partner was not open to adoption and still wasn’t at the point that I was starting to come to the end of our attempts. He said he needed more time but I was definitely readier much earlier than him and got all the information I needed regarding it. I knew I could love any child and give any child a loving family life. It’s tough both being on the same page xx

[CyclingAddict]

I'm sorry you're going through this. We found out that it would be very difficult for us to concieve naturally shortly after we started trying almost 4 years ago due to my husband having a low sperm count. It was a real shock to the system and it sucked all the fun out of trying. I struggled most during the first 2 years - I'd wake up having panic attacks and I'd become irritable and depressed. I know it's cliche to say but it does get better with time (although I still do have the occasional wobble). Remember to be kind to each other and yourself. You're going through a lot. If you know there's a chance you'll get upset in certain situations (like a baby's christening or birthday party), don't go - it's not worth it. And give yourself a chance to mourn. You thought, like I did, that you'd find someone you love and have a family and it'll be easy. It's ok to grieve for the child you thought you'd have by now. It's a very real loss, so don't feel ashamed to treat it like a loss.

It's been a marathon for me, rather than a sprint. And I've surprised myself with how resilient I am, as I'm sure you will too if you haven't already. We are definitely warriors!

[Wonderland_Ghost in reply to CyclingAddict]

You are so strong thank you for opening up to me my partner has got very low sperm count we wasn’t expecting anything to be wrong with his side. I am trying so hard but at the moment my mood just suddenly changes hopefully things get better thank you for all the positivity sending lots of love

[SurvivorPhoenix]

sending you lots of love. I can 100% resonate with how you’re feeling. This is a great forum to ask questions, get advice or just vent. You’re not alone on this forum ♥️

[IVFnewbie1]

we have just started on our ivf journey after nearly 4 years of trying. I just want to say like the others that this group has been so supportive. So nice to speak to people who understand. If you ever need to chat about anything then I’m happy to. We have just gone through our first cycle and unfortunately it was negative. I have low amh and partner has low morphology xx

[Yellow1993]

Hello, I'm really sorry to hear what you and your partner are going through, I'm in the same situation and I've just joined this forum tonight (I am so glad that I have as I was feeling so lonely in my journey) it's hard when you picture your life going a certain way and it doesn't happen like that (yet) here if you need anything and sending you well wishes xx