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Fertility Network UK
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struggling with infertility

I just want to share my story as an infertile woman and battling all the stresses that come with that. My intend is to inform and to give hope to people who can derive it from this and I want to make them develop the strength to make their situation better, however they choose to do so. This is in no way professional medical advice, just my own experience based opinions. So my awareness of my condition steams a bit further than most would in their own experiences. I was diagnosed with PCOS in my teenage years and ever since then, I was slowly introduced to the idea of my incapability to conceive, be it by doctors, my mother and my own self. So when I got married, I had already been familiar with the idea that me not being able to conceive would be a possibility. I had talked to my husband about this and he was very accepting and understanding of my situation. Neither of us were in a hurry to have children immediately after we got married so, for a few years, I wasn't actively worrying about it. When we came around to conceiving a couple of years later, we did the smart thing of going to the doctor preemptively. After taking some tests, we got our results. And that is when it was confirmed. I was unable to conceive. Even though i had been preparing myself for it, it manifesting in reality was a tough thing to bear regardless. My husband was my rock. He kept me together and he helped me move into the idea of using alternative means to conceive. We tried pills, hormone therapies, even IVFs. They all failed and they were all very painful. I have been hopeless. I have still been looking. There are a few promising procedures out there, but right now, I do not have the confidence in myself to pursue them. I have been thinking about opening myself up for them. But I fear disappointing my husband again. I hope something works out. I hope i can have my child. I will not give up. If you're in the same boat as me, keep strength and have hope. And for those who can reccommend some insight into things i can try or research, I'd appreciate it. Thanks for reading.

5 Replies
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Thank you for sharing your story. Your such a strong person. I hope you one day get the family you deserve. This whole process is not an easy one. I only find out last June that I had endometriosis which had done a lot of damage. I was previously told in investigation I was very healthy and Although I know my husband already had fertility issues I was convinced we would be fine. I’m still in stock now, started my second cycle last week, it just takes so much out of you. I wish you luck and happiness for the future xxxxxxx

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I don't know enough about PCOS to advise, but I know a few people with PCOS who didn't think they could have children and they do now, so there is always hope

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Hi Amanda, I am so happy to see your comment. Your post just shows so much optimism and strength that I can’t help myself but write something to make you feel that you are not alone and you are such an inspiration for others. You seem like a real genuine person who knows how it feels like to not be blessed with the best gift from God, a child of your own. I don’t know how you gather so much strength and still be so hopeful. You are not a disappointment but a resilient personality with a pure heart. As I saw that you have told about your PCOS, well it’s different for everyone, some conceive even after it and some don’t. It’s really just not the same for every person. IVF’s can be effective but there is still doubt for its success as with any other procedure. Well, I need to tell you about my sister in law, she did have PCOS and she also suffered from two major surgeries with two miscarriages. Life started to become a shallow place for her and I know how she used to call me and cry for hours on telling that she was a disappointment to the family. My brother has been a very tender husband and he searched for every possible fertility treatment. He came through this procedure Surrogacy which has gained a wide popularity now. He was not convinced until he saw the success stories and even heard about real ones from his colleagues. He and her wife booked an appointment and now they are flying next week to Ukraine for the treatment. I know there are still many pros and cons to the treatment but as you mentioned to never lose hope. Hope can take you to places you haven’t imagined. Stay strong and encouraging. I will let you know the details once they proceed through the first step.

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You are suffering from PCOS, so It's better for you to consult a fertility clinic. A lot of techniques are also available you can go for them but first consult a good and reliable fertility clinic. The excellent thing is that your husband is very supportive and cooperative. You can also try a last thing surrogacy. This is a process by which you can become the mother of your own child through a surrogate mother. Just go for it.

clover111

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Thank you for sharing your story with us. You are such a strong person. I wish and pray for you that one day you will get the family you deserve. This is not the easy process. I don't know about much PCOS but some people I know suffered from PCOS. But they have their children now. Don't lose your hope quite early. If there is no possibility to be a mother on your own, there are plenty of ways to be a mother. Medical science developed many ways to have own child. Have you heard about Surrogacy? I think you should go for it and don't fear to disappoint your husband. It is a safe way to have own child. Don't give up!!

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