Lifestyle changes for fertility

[Purplehedgehog87]

Hi all!We've had 3 failed icsi so far, now embarking on private. It's more of a moan and looking for reassurance that this is normal to feel this way.

We have finally got more answers and sense in one consultation then 3 years nhs. They suggested Mediterranean diet, certain supplements to help. I have done most and tried to overhaul diet years ago as I also have pcos and its hard work to maintain healthy weight; stress doesnt help my chocolate cravings or healthy eating, come a long way with my unhelpful eating behaviours but is still there.

My husband has been alot longer to come round to this path but now we are really looking at what we are eating.

The thing is this....I've been trying to do the best for so long that I feel it's hard to keep on the wagon but alot of the time I can't get fertility issues out of my head and it physically hurts so much and I'm desperate to make progress on this crappy journey.

Yet I know that with more changes the odds get better but I'm struggling more than I thought. I suppose after so long I'm so tired and limping along the dedication and passion isn't as good as it could be and then I feel awful. Especially as hubby has not consistently been as on board nowhere near as soon as I would have liked but did take supllements, cut back on drinks.

Anyone else find themselves in this situation?

[Doodlebug23]

Don’t beat yourself up too much. This is such a hard journey. I can totally empathise with having to lose your comforts and struggling with that and your conscience. Have you tried having one day a week to just do what you want? X

[Purplehedgehog87 in reply to Doodlebug23]

yeah we do that but its not naughty stuff we're eating but not as fertility friendly, you know usual British fare like roast, more carbs like mash, potatoes, etc, more meat if you get my drift. it takes more brain effort to work out stuff to cook and eat 😒

[Doodlebug23 in reply to Purplehedgehog87]

Like me right now. I’m day after transfer and couldn’t resist the churros at breakfast! Try the pinch of nom books. Healthy home cooked but so tasty x

[JA-fnuk Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

You are doing a great job but it can take a lot out of you ! Have you thought about trying acupuncture or reflexology - it may help relieve some of your stress Remember to give yourself a wee treat now and again such as date night with your OH - occasional dark chocolate treat at the end of the week

Take care

Janet-Partner

[Purplehedgehog87 in reply to JA-fnuk]

Thanks, I do have accupuncture, do yoga, getting back on track with meditation but realised was powering through in denial and I was actually quite depressed. We have decided to plan a random day out every month, time together each week (I work random shifts) and we're going away end November. it's just been 4 years of this so these things help a bit but it's still a hard slog

[CarlottaD27]

I find this hard too, especially since I’ve had one Dr tell me to try a Mediterranean diet and another say that mental health is more important and I’m allowed to indulge!

The main thing that helps me when I’m on a health kick is having my husband on board with too. If we’re both cooking healthy meals and eating healthily with each other it’s a lot easier. I also find meal planning at the start of the week and only buying in the healthy (ish!) meals we’ve agreed to eat helps us from going astray. I’ve also replaced all the white pasta which whole grain. I know it’s not as low carb as some PCOS diets recommend but it feels like a manageable step for me to enjoy pasta still but in a slightly healthier guise.

Good luck and do share if you find anything that works. All this is so much easier said than done. After another BFN all I want to do is reach for comfort food xxx

[BearPanda]

I get this 100%!!! I've tried to change so many habits and improve my diet at the start of my fertility journey and it felt like nothing is ever enough.... I also kept finding new diet and lifestyle rules that I realised I wasn't obeying so no matter how hard I tried, it was never enough I my head. What really brought it to perspective was when I focus more on how much I managed to change and started to appreciate the immense work and self control we are exercising while trying our best. Focus on all the positive little choices you make every day and remember they end up compounding. You ate some chocolate? Maybe the 'old' you would have eaten twice as much, so to me - you're still winning. Also notice if anything about your body improved; for example throughout this whole journey my nails got noticeable stringer and I haven't had a cold in a year. It gave me so much motivation when I realised that! That must means I'm doing something right! Same goes for your OH; some change is better than none, but I totally get much harder it is if the other person is not as strict. Best of luck to you too and congratulations on all the hard work you've put in already 💕

[Purplehedgehog87]

Thanks everyone for the support! Really helped, best of luck to all of you x