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Having fertility issues

Talliebobs profile image
11 Replies

Hello everyone.

So my husband and I have been having fertility issues for 4 years and due to covid we are yet to see a consultant but have had tests done. If IvF is suggested I'm really worried we won't qualify and then what. I am overweight and have struggled all my life. I have been dieting and exercising the past two years and if anything my weight has just increased. I noticed alot of you saying BMI has to be 30 what if there is no way to get to that does that mean I am not worthy to be a mother and this whole fertility thing was a waste of time and hope. We have no children but a miscarriage 4 years ago.

I suppose my question really is what to expect on this journey.

Sorry for the long one.

Many thanks

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Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs
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11 Replies
Lenz56 profile image
Lenz56

Hi Tallie. Sorry to hear youve struggled with your weight. Unfortunately to qualify for NHS ivf bmi has to be under 30. I was told the same thing too and really struggled to get it under 30. We decided to go private whilst i attempted to loose weight. A good place to start is weight watchers, the inperson meetings helped.

I wish you luck.

Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs in reply to Lenz56

Thanks I have done weight watchers, slimming world everything nothing works

Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs in reply to Lenz56

Sorry just wondered whether the whole BMI thing has ever been challenged on the base of being discriminatory.

Lenz56 profile image
Lenz56 in reply to Talliebobs

That's what I told my GP too and he did agree with me. I'm black and dont consider myself overweight, but according to BMI I am. I heard they're looking to change how they measure BMI but not sure how quick this will change.

Did you manage to loose weight with weight watchers even for a short period?

Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs in reply to Lenz56

I lost 1 stone then nothing for several weeks and then while still doing it the weight went back on plus more

Lenz56 profile image
Lenz56 in reply to Talliebobs

Its tough. Let us know how it goes with your telephone consultation. Its worth challenging them if you can.

Boo718 profile image
Boo718

Hello I was exactly the same as you my bmi was 43 I’ve got it down to 33 but that last bit is so hard to get rid off. Please be careful losing weight. It’s actually been detrimental to my fertility. I’ve lost 5 stone and it’s caused a huge shift in my hormones so they are all out of whack and although I was told by the nhs I needed to lose weight. The private clinic have said it really wasn’t a good idea 🤦‍♀️ They are not interested in bmi they were only interested in how healthy and active I was. After all the work to shift the weight to hear I’ve made it worse is a slap in the face xxx

Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs in reply to Boo718

I am so sorry that is just what I'm worried about. The more I'm thinking the more I'm getting angry about it. I'm going to wait and see what happens I have a telephone consultation on 10th May see what is said then I'm going to challenge the system.

Boo718 profile image
Boo718 in reply to Talliebobs

It’s sooo frustrating. A number of my friends are much larger women and it’s been absolutely no problem at all. The bmi thing is crazy. I was 16 stone and they said my Healthy bmi was 6.5st to 9 st 🤦‍♀️ but if I got my weight to 10st 10 then I could go through the nhs. I’m sitting stuck at 11st that last 4lb will not shift. I lost it over a year and a half. Coz I was told that losing it quickly was a really bad idea. So I busted my ass off and did it slowly. Now I’ve got a hormonal imbalance. Problems with inflammation in my lower back and even more scattered periods.

I’m not suggesting not to lose any weight just to lead a healthy lifestyle and be active. The private clinic hasn’t once weighed me. They just asked if there was any thing they should know and I said I’d lost 5 stone to which they said ‘oh’ xxx

Talliebobs profile image
Talliebobs in reply to Boo718

Sorry to be a pain how long has it taken you to lose the weight.

I lost 3 stone I’ve always been over weight it’s really hard especially I find if your got a pressure/aim for I find it harder to lose. I didn’t do it for ivf either as we weren’t offered it at the time but I was getting big so just decided it was time again to try I’ve done ww and sw before so I did slim fast Calorie control and exercise was the easiest diet I’ve done. I think the bmi of 30 it’s not just for ivf as when u are pregnant it’s a guide for being referred for tests say gestational diabetes etc

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