So here we are again. I had a feeling by day 4 post transfer but today confirmed my fears that our second embryo failed to implant. 😢 It's truly devastating after all the toil and anxiety as many of you will understand but I'm just relieved to have an answer at least.
Both embryos have been high grade day 5 blastocysts and my lining prep has been text book each time so not sure where to start.
Clinic have said they recommend adding lubion to cyclogest for the next transfer, but for no real reason given other than " to try something different" as they don't monitor progesterone levels during cycles. My progesterone levels were fine pre-treatment.
My plan is to generally just take a break and rest. I still feel time is of the essence but I'm emotionally and physically exhausted after two back to back transfers. My anxiety levels have been unreal too.
Do any of you have any experiences of complementary therapies or lifestyle type tips I could try?
Sending you love and best wishes for every success, wherever you are at right now xxx
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Minniemouse88
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I’m so so sorry…. It’s so devastating. Give yourself time to grieve 😔
I love acupuncture. I know quite a few people who swear by it for fertility - I don’t genuinely know whether it makes a real difference medically / factually, but I do find it really helps me relax and be positive about the whole process x
both - I go every week, then on day of transfer I go twice, before and after the transfer then go back to once a week (but some people only go for a couple of weeks / a couple of months, you don’t necessarily have to go every week as a habit ). x
I am so sorry to hear your news, sending big hugs. To help with anxiety and emotions, you might want to try some counselling. I’m finding it helpful at the moment as essentially with failed transfers, it’s like going through a loss/grieving process. I have also had both acupuncture and reflexology that I found relaxing and felt like good self-care. I think the key is to be kind to yourself and do things that will make you feel better physically and mentally. Xxx
Hi Minniemouse88 So sorry to hear about your 2nd implant failure. Our stories are exactly the same. Last weekend my 2nd transfer failed too. My progesterone levels were fine, they said my womb lining was perfect for pregnancy and the eggs were high grade.
It's just such an emotional journey but then not knowing why it failed can cause so much more anxiety and worry as we feel out of control.
Great idea to take time out and take a break. That's exactly what I decided. Going through IVF can be am emotional rollercoster and sometimes we need to take time out to regroup and reset.
I'm taking 90 days out and truly dedicating my time to focus on my overall fitness. Lifestyle diet, hormones and mental wellbeing all play a part. I've booked womb massages and have an appt with a herbalist who is making up some remedies for me to balance my hormones.
34 is still young, I'm 43 and I'm still confident I'll be pregnant. Our stories are the same for a lot of my friends in their 40s who struggled but after more than two failures they went on to conceive babies. Have hope. Focus on you and your wellbeing and when you're ready try again. Don't worry about age or time. I know how it feels, believe me. Sending you love and hugs ❤
I wish I could recommend something but unfortunately I’m kind of in the same boat. My transfer in December ended in miscarriage/blighted ovum and my transfer in March was unsuccessful, I had another transfer this month and I’m on day 8 post transfer and I’ve tested and I know it hasn’t worked. I don’t do false hope but have to wait til Saturday to fully confirm.
Leading up to this transfer I had acupuncture before the transfer and on the day of the transfer as somebody else mentioned also on the day pre and post transfer and although I don’t believe this transfer has worked, I was incredibly calmer throughout the process, much more relaxed and less anxious. A thumbs up to acupuncture.
I also had a fertility counsellor who was uplifting and understanding. I avoided forums and apps as much as possible. This helped but again still no answers.
It’s a tough one as like you I had great embryos and lining was excellent. I also doubled up on lubion injections this time (twice daily) and had cyclogest pessary as before. Progynova 3 times a day etc. Prior to transfer I did 5 days antibiotics and vaginal probiotics. I also don’t have any fertility issues as such. I have an older child and underwent this frustrating journey because my now partner had a vasectomy before we met 7 years ago after his 4 children.
What I plan to do; I’ve reached out to a new doctor who does a lot of testing on the mother and looks at possible autoimmune responses and other factors that might affects implantation rates. I’m not visibly overweight but heavier than I’ve ever been due to hormones and comfort eating so I might get back in the gym and lose some weight as weight can be a factor. Figure out how I’m going to get this money together for another egg collection ASAP as we only have 1 embryo left and I’m 37 and don’t want to snooze on my egg quality. Eat well, live good and try to enjoy spring & summer.
Try not to blame yourself and try to let it all flow. Make a plan that works for you to give you goals to focus on that will bring rewards to help feel better. I know it’s easier said than done because the second I feel ok I want to try again with so much determination and focus but it’s like a vicious abusive cycle this whole process when it doesn’t work. It takes so much energy. Do what feels good for you and nothing else. Sending love and hugs.
Sorry to hear about your BFN - I feel your pain. We had a rough journey through IVF and it's devastating and heartbreaking. But there is hope!
My first 2 transfers were good quality embryos, good lining etc - but started spotting a 2 days before OTD - so they assumed low progesterone and upped that.
The next one I didn't bleed early but still BFN - was on lubion / cyclogest...
Then we decided I should try a fresh transfer as always had frozen - BFN.
Before the next one I decided to have the ERA test done because I know I have a short luteal phase and thought this might be impacting the window of implantation - I was right and my progesterone was upped to 6 days before FET. Still BFN.
By this stage I was losing my mind - so decided to throw everything at it. We had 9 embryos in storage so had them PGS tested - 1 failed to thaw and out of 8, 6 were normal so we were pretty confident it wasn't a chromosomal issue.
So finally I decided to have my immune system checked. Bingo! My NK cells were sky high and essentially every time we had a transfer, my body was rejecting the embryos. So for our 6th transfer I started on steroids and intralipids - and it worked!!
It was a long process but for me it was a journey of eliminating things until we found the problem - it's so tricky when you're diagnosed as "unexplained" as you don't know where to start.
One of the reasons I wanted to check my immunity was that both my parents had psoriasis (autoimmune disease) and I'd read that familial AI could be a marker that you may have an over active immune system too. But also, once we found out that 6 of 8 embryos were normal we knew it wasn't likely to be anything else...
I wish I'd had that test sooner - but it's really pricey and due to covid they weren't allowed to give out steroids too - I was so lucky that just before my last transfer started they lifted that ban.
Hi, firstly want to say congratulations and wow what a journey you’ve been on. May I ask if you did all the tests on your own accord or did your clinic recommend? I’m in a similar situation where I’ve just had a second chemical from my FETs. I suspect it might be our embryos as they were low quality. My clinic keep saying it’s embryo but are not willing to test anything else. Also, how much extra did all the tests cost, if you don’t mind me asking. Happy to chat privately.
Thank you! Yep quite the journey indeed. I did a lot of my own research and usually went to each follow up meeting with things that I wanted testing. They usually agreed with me (I guess also because it's more money for them and a live birth looks good on their stats)
PGT-A testing is pricey - you pay for a thaw fee, and biopsy fee for each one - I think roughly £250 per embryo.
The immune bloods (Chicago bloods) were about £1200 I think. So all expensive but in my opinion those were the main ones we needed.
Really interesting as both my brother and mum have AIs and I have severe allergies so may be worth a discussion although we are currently NHS funded so not sure if we'll be able to pay for immune treatments as an add on. Thank you for sharing and congratulations xx
In that case I would definitely get it checked. I had the bloods done at my clinic but due to covid they woulnd't allow me to have my first intralipid drip there - so they actually referred me to a different clinic to have it - so this could be an option for you. I would talk to your consultant and say what you're thinking.
I know others who have been having NHS treatment and this wasn't sanctioned so they went to a separate clinic for just the immune treatment on the down low. If you like I can pm you the name of the clinic I used? xx
Thank you for that. We are going to see our NHS consultant at his private practice and will see what he says. If you get chance, yes please do pm me with the details. Thank you ❤️
hey, could I also have the name of the clinic you used for bloods. This is the route I’ve also decided to go down before transferring my last embryo. Thanks
So sorry to hear this, hope you are okay. I know how it feels, we've done ICSI for male factor and had 5 embryos fail - always perfect lining and "beautiful" blastocyst, it's such a horrible journey and doesn't get easier. Most likely you've had terrible luck - I saw a specialist who said the majority of failures are issues with the embryo, and our consultant had told us often the most "beautiful" or highly graded embryos can be genetically abnormal.Take some time out, go and do things that make you happy and hang out with friends who don't have children, you will feel better in time I promise.
I tried both fertility acupuncture and reflexology - didn't find acupuncture relaxing at all but really enjoyed reflexology. It's worth trying them but in my opinion if money is tight and you know other things can help you relax, then don't worry about not doing them if that makes sense.
The beauty of this place, is that you can find lots of happy stories....and that has always gave me hope for us.
I will recommend you to try to read some of those posts, because sometimes patient is important in this process.
In my first transfer I've got pregnant, and then in the week 17 we lost her. Since then I've had 4 transfers (coming up a 5th one) and they've been negative.
I always say to my husband that it will happen, we just need to do everything we can.
Sometimes you have to keep reminding to yourself about all the great things you have around you, I know sometimes it is not an easy process and sometimes you are going to good days and others are not going to be as good.
you mentioned that you feel anxious....have you thought about yoga for fertility ?
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then go back to once a week (but some people only go for a couple of weeks / a couple of months, you don’t necessarily have to go every week as a habit ). x 
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