When to move on to donor egg and sperm

[SRA8]

I have a really complicated history. Summary below.

First TTC took 2.5yrs

Severe male factor. First ISCI zero fertilisation. 2nd ISCI. 12 mature eggs. Only 3 fertilised. Got infection after egg collection. 1 embyro transferred whilst I still had temps between 38 and 39 degree. Period started 6 daya later.

Made lots of drastic diet changes etc. Husband sperm analysis now normal previously less than 1 million. Last one 63 million.

Conceived son naturally.

TTC number 2 for 19 months. Sperm analysis still normal. My AMH is 10, previously 12 four years ago. Just did IVF. 12 eggs collected. 8 mature. Only 1 fertilised. Other 7 there was no sperm binding. Embyro stopped growing day 3/4. I'm in hospital as ended up with another infection after egg collection. Its day 5 now and still having IV antibiotics.

Don't know how much of the problem is the eggs or the sperm.

The last 4 years have been the sickest of my life. The supplements cause my chronic health condition to flare and its a fine balance. Really fed up being sick often but since it worked the first time i feel the need to continue with them

We have one more cycle paid for but would need to add another £2.5k for drug costs and ISCI. I'm not sure I can keep putting myself through this.

When's it time to move on? To add difficulty we are a mixed race couple so finding a black egg donor will not be easy. I'm soon to be 37.

Thanks for reading if you got so far. Feeling so deflated. Any advice appreciated.

[blue_anemone]

Hello!! Sorry to hear you’re going through this..

If I were you, I would rethink the need to continue a regimen that is clearly making you unwell. Surely being sick can’t be good for your chances of conceiving, because our bodies are not going to allow for a pregnancy if the conditions aren’t right.

Before giving up or spending more money, maybe see if you can make any modifications to the supplements you take. Maybe try not taking any at all, but focus on nutrition. You might have read it, but Lily Nichols has this amazing book Real food for pregnancy, which I cannot recommend enough.

Best of luck in your journey.

[Ivfgotadream]

sorry to hear this OP

Is your husband on board with using donors? My husband absolutely wasn’t. So we continued with our own eggs and sperm. Eventually Had twins. Turns out didn’t matter that they are actually “his” in a biological/genetic sense and he has just walked out on us because he said the fact they are IVF babies his feelings towards them are “less” than our naturally conceived child

[SRA8 in reply to Ivfgotadream]

oh I'm sorry to hear this. I hope you are getting the support you need with your twins.

Thank fully my husband is a sweetheart and understands how much of a physical strain this is putting on me so is cool with donors, even adoption if we need.

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi SRA. Perhaps a DNA fragmentation test on the sperm? If there is a problem found, then perhaps with ICSI you will only need to find the egg donor. Obviously I wish you both well with all this and hope the wait is not too long. Thinking of you. Diane

[SRA8]

Hi.

Thanks for the response. DNA fragmentation was normal earlier this year.