Hello,
it's been just over a week since we recieved our negative result and tbh, I'm struggling massively. Icry everday, more than once,I'm so miserable, no motivation, can't even bear taking folic acid because I just don't see a point. My partner is fantastic and really helps. I'm just so down and feel like I've lost everything. Am I being really stupid and just need to snap out of it?
Do not be too hard on yourself .Hard to believe but this feeling will past . It is normal to feel the way you do - allow yourself time to grieve .Make sure you have people around you who can support you . And keep talking to your OH .Thinking of you and sending a big hug
Janet
Thank you for replying. He's handling it so well but I'm starting to feel like a burden. Not many people know we're going through ivf and I see so much support for the ladies on here x
So sorry to read this 😔 I've had your pain before and really understand. Its still early days so don't be too hard on yourself. Your partner sounds amazing 🥰 give yourself time. It isn't about snapping out of it, its a natural feeling of sadness. What are your next steps in IVF? Do you have a plan? This always helped me with the sadness ❤️✨️❤️
He really is, but then I caused a row yesterday so we're not talking atm. Yeah you're right. I just put too much pressure on myself to be feeling a certain way. We have 1 more embryo in storage so we'll be going ahead with that at some point. I just want to feel confident and positive going into the next round and not dwelling on the time it failed. The clinic keep calling for a follow up consultation but I just keep putting it off xx
Things are bound to be a bit tense. I'm sure you'll make up soon ❤️✨️ glad to hear you have another embie in the freezer. Have your consultation when you're ready, im sure you'll feel ready when the time comes and if you dont you can always reschedule. One step at a time xxx
I've found the courage to get it booked and see what the plan is next. Its not until 16th Sept so enough time to be in the right frame of mind, but like you said, if not I can reschedule. 1 step ❤️ thank you xx
I think just go with let it all out and if it takes time then it takes time, don’t try and mask and hide emotions, I did a counselling session after I had a failed cycle and it just really helped although I sat there and cried for about half an hour it did really help.
Yeah you're right. There's no time to put on grief. Hope you're doing well x
Aw love. It’s so hard isn’t it. Give yourself some time.
I always found that I just wanted to crack on with next steps after each fail. I was obsessively researching tests and what I could do to solve repeat implantation issues….
So for me, talking it through with my consultant helped massively.
Do you have that option?
Xxx
Ridiculously! I never imagined a failed cycle would hurt this bad, but I guess it shows how much we want to become mummies. I've just booked a consultation for 16th September, so will hopefully be in the right frame of mind by then. Hope you don't mind me asking, you said implantation issues? Xxx
Yes it does 💔
I had 5 failed transfers before we finally got a BFP. In all of them there was no implantation and it turned out that my body’s immune system was rejecting them. So I tried steroids to help with that and on our 6th transfer it worked 💖 xxx
Hey, just read your comment and thought I’d be cheeky and ask something! Did you ask your clinic regarding nk cell testing or did they suggest it? I would also like this test after our failed ivf and I have struggled with autoimmune issues so thinking it may be implantation issue too. X
Hey lovely, I actually did the research myself as my mum had an autoimmune disease and I read that if it’s in your family it could also affect you. I told my consultant this and said I wanted it testing. Mine came back 60 times higher than they should have been. I’m convinced that this was the main issue for us, although I also had the ERA test and we PGS tested our embryos xxx
Hey honey,
It’s extremely difficult and I also feel your pain as I had a negative a week ago after first IVF cycle.
Allow your time to grieve, its a big loss and lots of people not in our position will struggle to understand. Spend time with your partner, book a little getaway and eat desert and drink wine! It’s my only ‘escape’ from the negative news before we start the next long journey of IVF xx
Oh I'm so sorry to hear that. It saddens me everytime I see a negative result on here, because all any of us wants, is a chance to have healthy pregnancy and our precious bundle at the end of it.
Yeah, totally. I had a girl at work whos pregnant come up to me the other day and say "guess whos pregnant?!" And she knows im going through ivf! They just don't get it. But at the same time, maybe I'm just a little bit sensitive.
When are you planning on starting? Xx
No not sensitive at all, that’s incredible insensitive of her if you ask me! Does your clinic offer counselling? Me and my partner are booked in for a session mid sept, never done counselling before so not sure what to expect but going to give it a shot.
We cant get a follow up booked in for 4-6 weeks which is frustrating as we want to discuss what could be the issue/further testing quite soon but can’t be done any earlier.
What is your plan lovely? X
I just wanted to say that you're not being a bit sensitive at all. That is incredibly tactless of her. It never fails to surprise me how insensitive some people can be despite knowing someone is going through this. I'm sorry you had to deal with someone like that whilst you're going through something so difficult!
I've been there 5 times in the last 2 years , time heals but everytime that happend its just so hard to accept 💔, be gentle with yourself , and let time heals your wounds
So sorry 😞 doesn't get any easier. Thank you xx
After my last failed transfer I felt totally broken. The words of encouragement from the other ladies here gave me a big help. My husband also insisted that we had some joint counselling as we were both so so sad. It did help us , so if you clinic offers it I would recommend it. Sending you love
Honestly, the support on here is just incredible. Ah I'm glad it worked well for you both. I have a session booked for mid Sept, around the same time as my follow up. Thank you xx
Sorry to hear that 😞 I am in the same situation at this moment. None of my 3 eggs collected yesterday have fertilised 😭 I have the pain of collection but no embryos to transfer. What a cruel journey 😢
I'm so sorry to hear yours too! Was it your first egg collection? It's certainly there to try us but I'm sure it'll be okay in the end xxx
Thank you. Yes it was. I'm no sure if it is going be OK on the try. Xxx
Oh it's really deflating isn't it. Do you know what the next will be for you? Sending love Xxx
Period following BFN after 2ww
FET straight after Fresh BFN?
painful bleeding after IVF BFN 
Numb after yet another BFN... 
Virtually a BFN after a BPF on Tuesday 😢
