BFN 💔 absolutely heartbroken

[Nat1302]

After 2 miscarriages I thought we would be fine this time, they told me I had low progesterone levels which was quickly sorted with lots of extra medication... lubion injections, crinone gel, cyclogest and other things... done the test this morning as I was told, 10 days after embryo transfer... I was strong not to do it earlier and then I saw just one line in the test... didn't expect it as my previous 2 transfers had been successfull, however, I miscarriage.... Im so disappointed with myself, I look in the mirror and I can't even look at it... I just think why?? Im 31 years old, we started this journey mainly for my husband poor sperm quality and here I find myself not knowing what to think, not knowing what to do... I have to carry on with my medication until Saturday and do another test, I have no hope whatsoever. This was my last embryo as well... no strength enough or money to do this again. Maybe I dont deserve to be a mum.

Thank you for your support, all of you and thank u for reading me xxx

[sj482]

I am so sorry to hear this! Don't beat yourself up and don't say you don't deserve to be a Mum. This is such a hard journey for everyone. Sending positive thoughts. xx

[HaveFaith1]

Oh Nat, I'm so sorry. You may not feel you have the strength or money at the moment but maybe that will change over time. Life can be so unfair sometimes, and it's ok to be sad about that. I hope those sad feelings pass and you get some joyful news soon 🤞♥️

[JA-fnuk Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Thinking of youJanet

[AuroraXen]

Oh Nat I'm sorry. I get where you're coming from, completely. I'm a bit the opposite, in that I've done two fresh transfers and both BFN... I've never actually seen a positive 😪 so I think I'd die of shock if I ever actually got one! But if you had 2 BFPs you know your body can GET pregnant, which is major, and I can understand you'd expect it to be positive again (after all, this is what we ALL hope for). All I can say is that it's often a game of statistics... a lot (and depending on your age and circumstances, sadly MOST) transfers are not successful. I wish - we all wish - they were better odds. I can definitely assure you it's nothing you've done or not done, it's DEFO not that you don't deserve to be a mum 😘. Life is very unfair at times. If I were in your shoes, I'd take all the time you need right now to process the pain and disappointment and when you feel a bit stronger, think about your next steps. I know it won't feel like it, and it doesn't help lessen the pain, but at 31 the reality is you have time, lots of it in all likelihood, to make your dream come true one way or another. I don't know what the sperm defect is, but if there are no clear reasons why conception naturally is impossible, remember that quite a few couples who failed with IVF actually go on to have natural pregnancies in the following years. Maybe your circumstances will change and you can find the strength and funds to try IVF again down the line. I know none of this is good enough, and nothing can change the fact that today is an absolutely rubbish, soul-destroying day. But hang in there, and try not to lose hope. Hoping you have good support around you xx

[Nat1302 in reply to AuroraXen]

Thank you so much for your extraordinary advice.. I really appreciate it ❤

[Priyasharma]

Don't say such thing dear..just have faith.See I m 36yrs old and I m trying it since last 7 yrs..

You are just 31:yrs.. take break for few months take care of your health and then think about next attempt and this time please don't donate your eggs.

Everything will be fine.

[Nat1302 in reply to Priyasharma]

😘😘

[FrancyItaly]

I am so sorry to hear this, I know this must be really hard but don’t give up. Are you on the list for NHS? I had to wait only 3 months and had a successful cycle (although I had a miscarriage) and going for transfer soon, still on NHS. Is it offered in your area? Sending you a massive hug 💕

[Nat1302 in reply to FrancyItaly]

Unfortunately I'm not entitled to NHS as my husband already has a kid with her previous partner xx

[FrancyItaly in reply to Nat1302]

Awww ok, I didn’t think about that! Stay strong! Xx

[Andysa]

I’m so sorry this cycle hasn’t worked for you. Absolutely heartbreaking, it’s just not fair 😭 Do take the time to grieve and think about what you’d like to do next whatever that may be. Let the chocolate, booze, unpasteurized cheese and hot baths soothe your battered heart. I belong to Eastern Europe. I’m on the same journey like you had an ongoing tough journey. Today’s our OTD (9dp5dt) and sadly it’s a BFN. This was our 4th fresh cycle and we had 2 early blastocysts transferred. They weren’t the best quality and much worse than our previous cycles. This cycle was pretty difficult with multiple problems throughout the stemming process. I’m just feeling so depressed and disappointed but not surprised it didn’t take this time. Will need to take some time to process this and then to consider options from here. Previously I thought this would be our last round as the difficult journey has just taken such a toll on us over the past 6 years. Now I’m just hoping for the best and a positive result. Sending you lots of love, stay strong...

[Nat1302 in reply to Andysa]

Thank you ❤ I'm sorry for everything you are going through, is such a hard journey and it does take a toll in your mental health... take care of yourself lots of love for you too xx

[ki50]

Hi Nat, I also had a BFN on Sat (OTD) and again today, the having to continue meds when you know it's over feels so pointless doesn't it.. I share your pain and the emptiness of seeing the BFN but please don't think you don't deserve to be a mum, we can't know why it doesn't take (I had my last 2 frosties put in) so please be kind to yourself, lots of love x

[Nat1302 in reply to ki50]

Thank you for your kind words, it is really sad but I have just come to terms with it... nothing I can do. Keep strong lovely xx ❤