Chemical at 4.5 weeks :'(

[Li12]

Truly gutted. I don't know where to turn.

I had possibly the worse cold of my life 5 days ago and still feel very rough, can't seem to shift it. I had to work, of which is out doors in the heat, with a horrendous cold. And today, i felt I needed to test again after such a rough week and nothing.

I can't help but blame myself. But how can I get the time off work! I managed to take 2 weeks off as 'sick' as my kind doctor signed me off. One week from egg collection (21 eggs and very uncomfortable) and the next week to relax after transfer. The day I was back in bam...everyone has colds and pass it me. I feel I'm more run down from the drugs this month and the toll on my body is now dragging me down.

A top fertilised egg as well, im lost right now

[MissSaoPaulo]

I'm so sorry, what awful news. Please don't beat yourself up though, it's much more likely the embryo was chromosomally abnormal and stopped developing, even if it looked good at grading.I had a good graded blastocyst test positive but at the viability scan it hadn't developed. It's sh*t, but it happens and it is probably nothing to do with your rotten cold so please don't make yourself feel worse thinking there was something you could have done to avoid it, there almost certainly isn't. Sending big hugs xxx

[Li12 in reply to MissSaoPaulo]

Thank you and thats so heartbreaking to get to the viability scan! Im so sorry:(. Its hard to accept isn't it when your mind has already run away with what might be. This was out first positive in 4 yrs and first ivf treatment. I felt so flipping lucky!!I would probably blame myself no matter what ay. I think i feel worse from all the drugs this month, my body needs a well earned rest.

Xxx

[canwyyyyl]

As OP says, it’s very unlikely anything you have done that caused you to lose it, don’t worry. Plenty of people outside of IVF get pregnant putting their bodies through all sorts. It was likely just not quite right. Hopefully next time you won’t feel so rough though as I’m sure not feeling well straight after all those drugs can’t be very nice.

[Wedding10]

Aww I'm so so sorry this has happened to you. No words will make your pain go away but just know that everything happens for a reason. Just because it wasn't meant to be this time doesn't mean it will never happen for you. Your strong you must dig deep now and try your best to keep going on your pathway. Sending you heaps of love and strength x

[Li12 in reply to Wedding10]

Thank you very much. Its hard to accept when this was our first go at ivf, and first positive in 4yrs. I felt sooooooo blessed! Just briefly for a few days but your mind can't help but run away with whats to possibly come. Then its gone again :(.I'm sure I feel worse from all the drugs this month as well. My body needs to rest. I'm starting to look forward but my heart aches still xxx

[Wedding10]

I totally understand where your coming from. I think you see the positive test then before you know it you've planned out the rest if your life. I don't know much but from what iv read if it's chemical its likely that there's a problem with the embryo so defo nothing you have done, should have done etc. The drugs do not help at all and with a stinking cold aswell your body defo needs a rest. Your heart has every right to ache its natural to feel the way you do. But try your best to focus and get phyically and mentally strong again you've done it before and you can do it again x

[Lacryacky]

Just wanted to send you a big hug !!!🤗

[Jess1981]

I'm so very sorry, rest assured it was nothing you did wrong sadly chemical pregnancies are common 🥲 I have had 4 loses - 2 chemical pregnancies, early miscarriage at 6.5 weeks and one at 20 weeks. We conceived our 2 year old daughter a year after our first chemical pregnancy ( due to endo re growth and surgeries) our ex fertility specialist said us conceiving was huge progress and that we had been very unlucky to have lost our first pregnancy, but just because that one didn't work out didn't mean another pregnancy wouldn't. Please never blame yourself it is more likely a chromosome issue with an embryo and nothing you did wrong. I know it hurts deeply and I'm sorry you are going through this pain. But hopefully the next one will be your special rainbow baby Xx