It seems like I have been had, the system is designed very unfairly , you to make an assertive decision about family, the old fashioned notion of falling in love DH Laurence style does not exist.
You have start treatment before 40 as a younger person how would you finance a family at 25 let a lone if they need treatment.
A married woman at 41 can not, would not be better for the child if we were not put under this kind of pressure.
Feeling you. I have these save conversations with myself and when I am really angry. I have it with my husband! Rather I rant and he listens. It is what it is for us. But I hope in schools young men and and women are better educated! We go out of our way to warm against teenage/unwanted pregnancies and how to avoid them but why don’t they educate us properly. Yes go have a career and yes take all the time you need to meet someone, fall in love.. but preserve your fertility. Here are the things you can do! If someone had told me this at 25.. I would have. At 27 I was blowing money and living the high life. I met my husband at 30 and got married at 34. Two years had gone by before I worked out something was wrong 😑 by the time tests were down and polops removed, laparoscopy and hysterectoscope etc were looked into I was having first go at ivf at 38! But if they didn’t pitch pregnancy as a given when I was at school I would have done something about it when I rolling it cash and had nothing better to do with my time. In fact I would have been one of those people donating... I kick myself everyday at my ignorance... I am livid my teachers my parents my doctors throughtout my life, professors.. all these experienced and clever people and not a single one raised awareness...not even the freakin media..
At 27 I did not have money. I could only make the rent
Which just proves what an idiot I am to have nothing to show for all the time and money I had! Sure a house and holidays etc but it can’t buy me what I really want!
Not everyone had a high life, I am talking about love, you do not know what age your going to meet Mr right.
I think our generation was different to this, plus socialisation
Infertility doesn’t discriminate, plenty of women in their twenties fund treatments, even single women in their twenties and they manage financing having a family on top of that.
I could not have done
Up£ 20 000
Why do you feel like you have been had? Were you in a position or a relationship in your twenties that you were trying for a baby and was unable? Have you been in a relationship since then that you have tried and been unable. If you haven’t then you haven’t been had by the system, it’s just how your circumstances have fallen. Some people do have the means and are settled to have a baby and also fund treatment in their twenties. Some it does take longer to find the right person to settle down with and to choose to have a family with but that’s just life. Most people don’t know if they can or can’t have children until they start to try. Some people have conditions that make having children harder, but some people with exactly the same conditions have no problems at all. Have you made a decision about moving forward with fertility treatment or how you are potentially going to achieve your dream. I don’t want this to come across as harsh as that’s not how it’s intended but sometimes looking back isn’t helpful. Hindsight is a wonderful thing but you can only go on what you know at the time. You can’t change the past, it is what it is and making positive decisive decisions may help you find a clear path to the future you want x
Yes I have been trying for 4 years, it has put strain on our relationship
If you have been actively trying to get pregnant for 4 years has your partner had a sperm analysis done as you’ve asked previously about sperm donation? What does he think about fertility treatment? Is he for or against. If he is against but you still want a baby, then going it alone may be the best option for you. If you are in a relationship that is on different pages when it comes to ivf or children in general it will only build up resentment between you and that’s not good for anyone. If he is against but you want to stay with him then I would suggest counselling as continuing to feel how you do with no chance of that changing will just make both of you miserable and everyone deserves to be happy. Also in one of your replies you have said that you think your generation was different. In what way?
There was no talk of donors when I was younger
I feel positive about my future
Feeling like a Balloon ! 
Feeling like a bad friend
Feels like I'm on repeat 
Feeling like a rubbish friend
Feeling Like a Failure at Work
