I really hope this post doesn’t come across insensitive to anyone who is still waiting for their BFP and is not really a problem as such. I’m finally 7 weeks pregnant after 4 years of TTC and IVF. This is the most important thing to me. However I’ve also been working hard towards a promotion at work for the last 2 years which is finally available. Now I’m torn whether to apply. I’d be worried about telling work I’m pregnant if I got the job but might have to say something soon as I’m suffering from severe morning sickness and may need time off. Does anyone have any advice? x
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Nicki89
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Hi Nicki- congratulations on your pregnancy! It’s a difficult question....I’m quite ambitious and if I was in your shoes I’d go for it.....but on the other side, you’ve been working so hard to get pregnant and this is your priority that I’m not sure it’s a good idea.
A new job means stress while your learn the ropes, new relationships to create with colleagues, a new boss (who may or not may be supportive), flexibility to work extra hours if required, travelling (possibly!)....all things that wouldn’t help your situation.
I’ve been in a new role 9 months - have started it just after the first March lockdown (which was also when I had my first mmc 🙈🙈🙈)....I don’t like it at all and up until a week ago I was looking for a new one.
Then I got my BFP and thought better to stay put for a while to see how the pregnancy progresses...
Hey, this is my personal opinion but hope you find your answers 💪🏻🍀🍀🍀
I would say Definitely go for it, infertility has robbed enough from us, you deserve this and the extra money will come in handy for mat leave. They absolutely cannot hold it against you and would be in serious trouble if they did. its so early in your pregnancy you can certainly give the the new role a good go for 5 or so months before you go off, this will reserve your position, and prevent anyone else overtaking you when you come back. It may be harder to apply for promotions when you come back off Mat leave especially if you come back part time.
I am a lawyer and 19 weeks pregnant following IVF, ive just applied for a promotion. I cant bear of the thought of the boys in my team half my age overtaking me when i come back haha!
I’d say go for it too! From my personal experience, I believe infertility hindered my career progression. I had the opportunity but didn’t apply for promotion before Mat leave when I was pregnant and wish I had because on return to work, although my priorities had changed, I feel I had to fight even harder for promotion because I didn’t make the step up at the right time. Good luck x
I would definitely go for it, I have a lot of regrets over the last 5 years of just putting my life on hold in case of a baby. Its fantastic you are pregnant congratulations - and that shouldn't impact your career progression. Have confidence in yourself and your abilities and think about the fantastic future you are setting up for your baby.. he or she will be very proud of their Mum xx
Take the promotion - we need to close that pay gap and employers must wake up and ensure better working conditions for pregnant women and working mothers. If you are sick, take time off and still apply for the promotion. Break the glass ceiling!! xxxx
Pregnancy really should be a 'none thing' when thinking about applying for jobs, promotions etc, from your work's and an equality perspective. So from that side you should not worry at all as once you have your baby your promoted position should be there waiting for you and you have plenty of time to do it once the baby is born and you're back from mat leave. So then it just comes down to your own stress and head space . Personally I'd go for it as I'm quite ambitious, but if you know that it will cause you immense stress then it's not worth risking your pregnancy for. xx
I would certainly say go for it! I am 7 weeks pregnant too and have always said (hope I can live up to it) that the baby will have to fit into our lives not the other way around.
Prioritise you, and your career - it is the one thing you can be selfish with! The baby will fit into it exactly the same it will fit into your life if you stay in your current role. You wanted this for a long time and you only regret things you don’t do!
Hi Ladies,Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. I honestly didn’t think I would get any replies to this post. It will be hard work but I’ve decided to apply for the promotion. I can always withdraw my application at a later stage so at least this gives me more time to think about it. Fingers crossed! x
You’re absolutely doing the right thing! Last year I was offered a new job whilst going through IVF. When I got my BFP I was so unsure whether to take it or not but it was a significant pay rise and I was pretty miserable where I was. I took the leap and am so glad I did because sadly at our 12 week scan the baby was shown to have abnormalities and a low likelihood of a live birth so we decided to opt for a termination. My new job were fantastic about it and so kind and supportive and It was so good to have something to throw myself into as a distraction afterwards. My point is that we can’t put our lives on hold through the trials and tribulations of this wild fertility journey - it really takes enough form us. The laws around pregnancy in the work place mean you’ll also be protected so go for it. Think of the extra ££ on maternity. Keep us posted on how you get on xxxx
Even if you were about to give birth, you should apply. We all need to actively combat the belief that pregnancy should somehow force us to make trade offs when it comes to careers. Mat leave doesn’t last forever and companies need great talent to move things forward. It takes months to find a good candidate, then another 6-18 months for that person to be effective in their role. So if you’re the right person for the job long term then help the employer make sensible arrangements - train someone more junior step into the role whilst you’re on mat leave, etc. When you come back from leave, focus on the most important tasks and learn to let the rest wait or be done by someone else. Would a man have this same dilemma?
Hey Nicki, massive congratulations on your pregnancy. That’s such wonderful news. Personally I’d say go for it as it’s something you’ve been working towards for years. They can’t hold pregnancy / pregnancy sickness against you. Hopefully it’ll give you a better rate of mat leave and a job you’ll be excited to return to. That being said, not taking it and focusing on your pregnancy would also be a fine decision. All the best with it all xx
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