Clinic won’t freeze my remaining embryos

[BettyBe]

Just want to vent and ask if any other ladies have experienced this...

We just had our fresh cycle and were overjoyed that we had 16 eggs collected. The next day we got a call to say 13 had fertilised via ICSI and 2 days after that 13 were still going.

On the day of transfer I was told we only had 2 to transfer, one 4ab and 5bc, I requested both to be transferred. They said I had 2 eggs left at 3cc and the others were a bit iffy but they’d let me know the next day.

Today I got a call to say we have no eggs and they won’t freeze the 2 x 3cc eggs. I’ve been very upset and in tears. I know I should feel lucky that I have transferred 2 but I’m feeling hopeless. I’m not meaning this post to be insensitive to anyone who is struggling at all. I don’t know if it’s all the drugs, the journey but just feeling deflated, overwhelmed and negative... I thought 3cc (although not great) might be worth a chance?? Sorry if this upsets anyone out there ... just curious if other labs would freeze 3cc quality eggs??

[Nicki89]

Hi BettyBe. I’ve just had my first cycle on the NHS and they said they would only freeze any A or B grade embryos but I don’t know if it varies by hospital. I felt sad too at letting go of embryos x

[BettyBe in reply to Nicki89]

Thank you for the reply, I’ve read about so many ladies getting pregnant with low grade eggs that I thought it would be worth a shot, or at least my choice. We went private so I thought we’d have a bit more control. I’ve read that the grading isn’t always accurate either... xx

[Florencenightingale]

My doc said their clinic dont freeze anything less than A or B grade. Sorry this isn't what you wanted. Keeping my fingers crossed for your 2 embies xx

[BettyBe in reply to Florencenightingale]

Thank you, just wanted a back up plan... at 43, time is running out xx

[Florencenightingale in reply to BettyBe]

Such a sad time when theres no frosties. We were in the same boat, only got 4 eggs, only one fertilised but made it to day 5 at 5AB, thankfully now 34 weeks with our miracle.xx

[BettyBe in reply to Florencenightingale]

Awww that’s fantastic news!!! Congratulations!! 🌈💖🎊🌺🥰Thank you for sharing, I’m crossing everything for the same hopefully xx

[Florencenightingale in reply to BettyBe]

Got everything crossed for you lovely xx

[ttcemmie]

Hi BettyBe. I understand how devastating it is. For me, I feel that some chance is better than none at all, especially when women do get pregnant with not the highest grade embryos, and I've had high grade embryos transferred, and not gotten pregnant. My last cycle I had 5 embryos at day 5 and the clinic said they're not good enough for freezing (didn't even tell me the grades), and the cycle before that 6 embryos at day 5 all not good enough for freezing. I feel like they are trying to force me to go through a fresh round each time. Anyway, I basically said can they please stop chucking all my embryos away without my consent and now I have a note on my file that basically says I'm difficult and precious and to consult with me on each round on which embryos to freeze. Finally! Shouldn't they consult with us as a matter of course? They're our embryos! xxxx

[BettyBe in reply to ttcemmie]

Exactly my sentiment!! I thought we’d have the option to give it a go at least. I’m thinking I should have pushed them to freeze them but the way the conversation went, it sounded like they had already discarded them - I wasn’t asked, I was told 😔 just wondering why so many clinics will use these eggs and others won’t. Is it a numbers game for their success reputation / or like you said, more money for a fresh cycle, which is not cheap? Thank you for your reply and good luck with your pregnancy also lovely 🥰🌺🌈🎊💖xx

[Orangeflowers]

My conversion rate was low similarly - got 20 eggs, 14 fertilised, on day 5 one to transfer, day 6 ,- only 2 to freeze (one of which was a c+). I was disappointed, but understand that the rest just weren't dividing right. Would be low chance of surviving freeze and resulting in successful pregnancy due to chromosomal abnormalities. On a positive note as time is short at least I won't be wasting my time on ones that won't make it, and could result in mid carriage. Better to focus on getting higher quality ones from a future cycle. The advantage of IVF is that it can screen the poker ones out. Although of course sometimes lower grade ones might make it, the success chances are far less. I hope everything goes well for you 💖💖

[BettyBe in reply to Orangeflowers]

True, that’s a good way of thinking about it. It would be a waste of time / money / heartache to turn up on FET day to find out they didn’t make the thaw or even a mc. Thank you for the well wishes, I think I’ve started the 2ww psychosis early this time!! 🙈 Trying to be positive but it’s not been working today xx

[LadyM2019]

Betty my clinic are the same. They will only freeze Blastocysts that at least meet grade B by 11am on day 5. They freeze nothing with a C and do not freeze day 6 embryos. I was so disappointed when 4 of my blastocysts were discarded, so to speak. xx

[BettyBe in reply to LadyM2019]

I’m sorry to hear that. Did they give you a reason why? Is it to do with thawing / success rate? Xx

[LadyM2019 in reply to BettyBe]

No they didn't actually, they just said they have a 'strict policy'. It's an NHS clinic xx

[HopeTTC18 in reply to LadyM2019]

I’d be very upset with a clinic that doesn’t freeze day 6 embryos since mine is asleep upstairs in her cot.

You have to every right to be upset. I really hope that one or both of these stick xx

[BettyBe in reply to HopeTTC18]

Thank you! I really hope so too 🤞✨ not sure I can go through another fresh cycle and all the drugs. It’s stories like yours that makes me think day 6 c grade is worth a shot! Glad your clinic were different and you have your beautiful daughter xx

[HelenJudi1]

From my round of ivf after 18 eggs being collected I got one A blastocyst (Now my 11 week old baby girl) and two C blastocysts which are currently frozen. My clinic froze them both and said I could use them in the future. I’m at a private clinic too... I also know a woman who’s A grade didn’t work but her C grade have her a baby boy... I don’t understand why they won’t freeze them for you? Especially if you’re paying for it?!

[BettyBe in reply to HelenJudi1]

I don’t know either! I’m going to ask my consultant but maybe it’s to do with success rates of the clinic and reputation or maybe they’re more willing to transfer a fresh c grade egg than freeze due to thawing issues? I really don’t know.

I had a top quality 5aa transfer earlier this year that failed and I was successful with my son when I had a double transfer of 4bc and 3bc - he could easily have been the 3bc that made it...

Now thinking I should have been more forthright xx

[Orangeflowers in reply to BettyBe]

Trying to get more info from the consultant/embryologist is a good plan. Unfortunately, it's still not a matter of course that basic info is shared with us. I had to ask for my grades and wouldn't have got them otherwise. I then probed the consultant on what had happened to my remaining eggs that had fertilised but not progressed to day 6, as a default position seems to always be "it's due to your age and lower quality eggs". Found out that DNA fragmentation was at work, where basically the cytoplasm isn't fully incorporated in the growing cell on division. When this happens the growing embryo is at high risk of dying off, either before or after transfer. It could be that there were signs of fragmentation or apoptosis and they just fed back the grade to you. It would be interesting to find out. It only takes one and I'm sure you'll get there 💖💖

[BettyBe in reply to Orangeflowers]

I am guessing they will say the age / egg quality adage that I’m used to hearing now and not to expect too much being 43 going on 44. You’re right, I’ll ask my consultant if we have a follow up appointment. Thank you for the hopeful wishes 🌺 xx

[LCharlton]

My understanding is they won't freeze them because the C grade embryos are highly unlikely to survive freezing and thawing xx

[BettyBe in reply to LCharlton]

It makes sense, you just feel that it’s all a lottery and the c grade might be the one that hits the jackpot xx

[Ivfgotadream]

I think my clinic would freeze down to a CD but that’s it. But you have to trust the embryologists judgment whether he thinks it’s viable - grading is subjective - what one persons thinks is a CC someone else might put at a DD

[BettyBe in reply to Ivfgotadream]

You’re right, I think my clinic were too quick. Maybe something went wrong on the 6th day.

Just gutted that 13 quickly went down to 2. But I should count myself lucky and grateful that I have 2, and I am grateful. I think I’m scared that if this cycle fails and there’s another lockdown... it’s going to be a long wait again to start all over 😔 xx

[lizzybee81]

I’m not 100% sure on the key you’re using but I had 13 eggs collected, 8 fertilised. On Day 5 I had 2 Grade B’s transferred and my clinic said there could be 5 more but they needed another day. On Day 6 they called to say they were happy to freeze all 5 2A’s and 3 C’s so I think it really depends on your clinic. Before they destroy them could you see if you can find another clinic willing to use them?

[BettyBe in reply to lizzybee81]

That’s interesting that different clinics are willing / not willing. I don’t know if it’s too late now. They called this morning so they might have destroyed them already 😔 xx

[jengi]

It might be worth asking for a chat with the embryologist, they are the ones witnessing everything in the lab. I found sometimes the messages got dumbed down. I like the detail and these are the guys with the detail. My NHS clinic offered the opportunity to meet with the head embryologist. After every round I made an appointment to see her, she gave me the detail I needed to hear. Or at least ask your consultant for more detail on why they are graded as they are. Good luck Xx

[lizzybee81 in reply to jengi]

I agree speak to the embryologist. It’s was only when I specifically asked about the grade of the ones they were freezing they told me, otherwise it was “We’re freezing 5” 5 what? With respect, these aren’t fish fingers! 🤦🏻‍♀️

[BettyBe in reply to lizzybee81]

I will ring and ask, thank you. Maybe there was a reason but they didn’t tell me. I knew it was bad news from her voice when she called, so she maybe have just wanted to give me the news and get off the phone xx

[Running79 in reply to BettyBe]

That’s another something they seem to do, I had two embryos PGTA tested and they came back chromosomally abnormal, she ran through which number chromosomes were defective, which meant nothing to me whatsoever and then offered counselling?! I said what would I need that for - clearly because she wanted off of the phone

[BettyBe in reply to Running79]

Yes, sounds similar... told me the news and rushed off. Left me a bit stunned!

[Tweeteaha]

Though Cc may be adequate enough to perform as a transfers they could be frozen but unfortunately they probably wouldn't survive the thawing. Fingers crossed for your 2 transfered embies

[BettyBe in reply to Tweeteaha]

Thank you, yes hoping I don’t need to worry about a back up 🌺 xx

[Running79]

This is what annoys me with hospitals, they don’t seem to give you the choice of what grade eggs to put back So when you turn up they’ve already got one ready for you, and let’s face it the grading is only a matter of opinion anyway!

They should really give us the choice of what we are using, they are our embryos after all

[BettyBe in reply to Running79]

It’s sounding like this is the practice across a lot of clinics. There must be a reason / adhering to HFEA guidelines of practice?

[KiboXX in reply to BettyBe]

I think someone has said this already but the reason is because they are very unlikely to survive the freeze and thaw process. I know how disappointing it is to have nothing to freeze, I went through three rounds with nothing at the end of it and it’s heartbreaking.

I know it’s hard but I trust the embryologist are experts and making the right decision in the long term xx

[BettyBe in reply to KiboXX]

You’re right, maybe they weren’t viable c grades or they had stopped. Thank you for your reply xx

[KiboXX in reply to BettyBe]

Hopefully you’ll have good news on OTD and none of this will matter anymore 🥰🤞🏻xx

[BettyBe in reply to KiboXX]

Thank you, I really hope so, I don’t have much fight left in me 💖🌺 xx