I know that Xmas can be a time of sadness and emptiness and a reminder that yet another year has passed without having a baby to hold in your arms.
Please don’t give up hope and think of the positives in your life from 2019. The fact that you’re going through ivf means you are working hard towards your goal of having a family and honestly, 2020 is going to be The Year for so so many of you.
I have had 5 or 6 years of Xmas holes of emptiness since trying to conceive. I remember crying last year before I even got out of bed. But I dried my eyes and despite the sadness, still had a lovely Xmas with the people that I do love and appreciate for having in my life.
It took me 3 surgeries, 3 fresh cycles of ivf, 8 embryo transfers and a miscarriage earlier this year to get pregnant. This Xmas I’m 29 weeks and feeling so blessed and so magical. I never knew if I’d ever be pregnant and be one of the lucky ones who was able to post this...
So I just wanted to say- please don’t give up hope - please remain positive and strong and keep going - it may feel like it’s taking forever and life may feel so cruel and unfair, but it can happen.
Merry Xmas to all of you, no matter where you are on your journey to being a parent xxxxx
Written by
Scarlett13
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Congratulations to you.... I too am one of those blessed and have my Miracle baby of 7 months here this year. Counting blessings and thinking of all those still on the journey to motherhood ❤️
I always come back to this forum. Ivf warriors will always be my tribe. I never forget the men and women still on their journeys. This has changed me as a person forever. Ivf is only understood by those going through it xxx
Im alright, as you say this time of year is a bit crap but hey, it is what it is! We went to London and had an ERA test (not cheap but nothing is in this game) done a couple of weeks ago in London and it looks like my implantation window is out by a whole day which is probably why none of my 5 day transfers worked and although we had tried moving transfer timing which lead us to our losses (probably due to suboptimal timings) we now know that I have an implantation window around 144hrs! So something else with me that isnt quite normal. So the plan is to transfer again in Jan/Feb and hope for the best....no guarantees of course!xx
Hi Cinderella. That is what my ERA showed. The first transfer was negative but I got a positive the 2nd time round, unfortunately I have miscarried following nothing seen on the viability scan on Friday and our Christmas morning is going to be spent at the hospital as they are concerned I have not bled or had no pain!
Hey Willow, I'm so very sorry that you are having to spend xmas in hospital....or be there anytime in fact! Do you still have a high hCG? I know there are no guarantees with the ERA but should increase our chances. Sending lots nd love at this time.xxxx
Merry Xmas to you and the bump🎀I have been also reflecting a lot this year while staring at my Xmas tree and remembering exactly how it felt. And this year like you I am also blessed but the more I think about it I am overwhelmed with disbelief it happened
Lovely, lovely message Scarlett. This time next year so many will be able to post a similar message, which is such an encouraging thing to be reminded of. Congratulations on being 29 weeks and so happy your Christmas has been transformed after what you felt last year...x
These last few weeks have been so difficult. I m on cycolgest and progynova and had a prosteap injection last week. I feel like I'm going mad. I'm fighting with my husband and have started thinking it would be kinder to leave him so he can have a family with someone else. I just feel like crying all the time. Watching Elf and it's making me cry. Miss my life before ivf ruined it.
So sorry you’re feeling like this. I’m sure your husband wouldn’t want you to leave, this is your fertility issue as a couple, you’re married, regardless of who has the physical issue. Team work is needed xxxx
When I read this it made me cry, but for a good reason, reading your story makes me want to pick myself up again and continue to be positive in this cycle (I only have 1 viable female embryo which has been tested for a genetic disorder I have and it doesn’t have it thank goodness!). I did have 2 embryos but one had to be discarded as it did have the gene. It does upset me that I only have 1 embryo and the other one won’t be there anymore but one is better than none I guess! This is my second cycle and the clinic have a view for me to start the oestrogen tablets in January in preparation for the frozen embryo transfer.
Unfortunately I miscarried in June during my first cycle which again I only had 1 viable male embryo so had to start right back at the beginning again. I can’t help but think if my cycle worked I would be 6 months pregnant with my baby boy by now. However reading stories like this makes you want to keep going! So I’m hoping this cycle does take me to full term pregnancy and I will have my baby girl by October 2020!
I hope you have a Merry Christmas and happy new year!
What a lovely post. I too never thought we would be lucky enough to have our precious miracle xx I’ve just been reading down the comments and see ur c section is booked for 24th feb- my due date is 23rd feb dependant on if I need a c section too!
Hi Scarlett! How are you? Thank you for posting such a positive thing. This post will give hope to a lot of people trying out there. It will also make sure that they don't stop trying. Nothing good comes without struggle. So it's important to be patient and keep trying hard. It's also important to focus on the positives of your life instead of negatives. It will help you relax and focus on the next big thing. Congratulations girl on BFP. My blessings are with you. Take good care of yourself. Good luck! Goodbye!
Thank you so much for your lovely and true words xxx
Thankyou Scarlett for your uplifting message,hope your doing well.
I've opted for a quiet Xmas this year,just me the OH and Sabrina our fur baby, I couldn't cope with the idea of being surrounded by all the babies in my family on both Xmas day and boxing day,although I love them dearly seeing all of them together would have just made me too sad but I feel better now I've made the decision not to put myself through it and feeling strong about going into it all again in April for transfer number 6.
Glad you have plans for more ivf in the new year, you’ve got to keep going. I know sometimes it’s so hard but if you don’t keep going it won’t happen. Have a lovely quiet Xmas, you have to look after yourself xxx
Thanks for posting this Scarlett. Feeling so low. Would've been due to announce my pregnancy nye but now it's not to be. Mmc at 9 weeks and I'm devastated but like you say, I'll NEVER give it up. Wishing you a continued happy and healthy pregnancy. Merry Xmas! X
Hey Scarlett! I hope you are doing well. You have shared a very nice piece of motivation. People need to understand that good things are not that easy to get. If you get something without struggle, you don't respect its worth. So keep trying and one day you will be able to hold your child in your hands. That day can be a week away, a month or even an year, but that is only possible if you don't give up. After years of struggle and failed attempts, i became a mother through IVF. So yes, it's possible if you are patient. Take care Scarlett. Thank you for sharing this with us. Good luck all. Stay blessed. Bye!
I wish u healthy pregnancy and very happy new year .
Love your post and giving me hope for new year to come us we have only two frostie left. Thank u hun for your words and please keep us here updated xx🎄❤️
You are a very strong lady congratulations and I wish you all the best I’m on my ttc journey but I am blessed with children already it all came very easy to me until recently I have suspected endometriosis and lost my last baby in September at almost 13 weeks but stories like yours make me realise how truly blessed I am already although I feel like I have a piece missing you give hope to many of us I will probably now have to have operations and ivf but I can’t tell the future, sometimes I look outside the window at my angels grave and wish she was here with me this Christmas Eve (due date would have been March )but it wasn’t meant to be!congratulations again on your miracle I just wanted to say what a strong woman you are for posting this and inspiring for others x
Hi Scarlett! How are you? I hope you are doing fine. It's hard to live without children. The second I held my beautiful baby in my hands, I knew that my whole world is going to change. So if anyone is trying out there and thinking about giving up. Don't, this is the most beautiful thing you will ever experience. No matter how much time it takes, how much pain you have to go through, it's worth it. So I hope this next year brings a lot of bfp for all of you. Thank you for giving people hope Scarlett. Take care. Good luck! Stay blessed. Bye!
Thanks for the beautiful post. I was just thinking what I did this time last year and was quite depressed to think that I am going to welcome another new year in the middle of a fresh cycle. When everyone is taking vacations, posting pictures with their kids and generally unwinding this is the time when I need to go thru the rigorous process again just like last year. Hope it is all worth it at the end.
Thank you for this lovey positive message Scarlett. You are so right. I’m trying to think like this, I have so much to be grateful for and I’m lucky to spend it with my hubby and family.Merry Christmas to you & your bump. Hope it’s the best Christmas ever! Xxx
Thanks for your words of encouragement and I’m so happy to hear you got your miracle in the end. I’m in the TWW of my fourth transfer (3rd cycle, embryos 6&7). I started IVF in October 2018, and was unexplained but had a lap and excision after my third fail and they found endo. Had sore boobs until today (Christmas Day 😭) and my OTD is Saturday. Did a huge cry this morning, just can’t see this ever working out. Wishing everyone a peaceful day filled with optimism. As you say, we’re doing all we can and hopefully this time next year we’ll be in the same boat as you. Enjoy every second xxxx
Thank you for this lovely message. Just got back after a wonderful Christmas Day but just started to feel a bit sad that a third Christmas Day had passed without us becoming parents or being any closer to our dream. So lovely to read your positive story, it gives me hope. Sending you health and happiness for 2020! xxx
I needed to read this, thank you. But honestly, I just feel like killing myself tonight. It’s been 3.5 years. I got my period today. I’ve had 3 rounds of egg retrieval with the latest one resulting in all 23 eggs not resulting in embryos. 3 failed FET, and one miscarriage. It’s MFI, and we don’t know what’s wrong and doctor suggested donor sperm. I’m not ok with that, no hope. I can’t see myself getting out of this deep, dark tunnel.
Delighted to hear your pregnancy going well! Wishing you the most wonderful 2020 and thank you for your post. Just what I needed to read after 4 transfers and 2 early miscarriages last year. I'm starting another fresh cycle soon xx
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Gonna be a hard Christmas 
