OTD - BFN

[GELL18]

So I tested this morning it was my day 14 and it's all over for now.. my test was negative.. just text at work saying iam not coming in.....

This was our first cycle... havnt told my husband yet.. he had a deadline at work so just thought we can deal with it when he comes home...

Do you guys ever feel you are the weal link in the relationship... I worked two jobs to raise money for treatment and gave up my car.. now using buses in this cold. But it feels like it was all for nothing.

We had a low grade embryo and did a short protocal and dr thought it might be best to do long protocal next time to give my eggs time to mature. Not forgetting all my best eggs where my high up left ovary.

On Friday I had period feeling and cramps so started grieving then, not sure what to feel today... and facing my husband dissapointment is the worst I feel like iam constantly failing him...

How long will my periods take to come on now that I have stopped meds?

This road is surely hard.... thank you all for the support.. I continue to learn and be inspired not to give up by so many of you... 💕💕💕

[Solly-44]

I’m so sorry love. Please don’t see yourself as a weak link - It sounds like you’ve shown real determination and grit to get to this stage. It really hurts so try to be kind to yourself.

In answer to your question my period usually starts about 2 days after I stop meds xx

[GELL18 in reply to Solly-44]

Thank you solly-44 Iam trying hard to see how fortunate I was to get to transfer and having the strength to pick myself up and start working hard again to do a second round in a few months..

With all the support here it helps not to feel alone... thank you for the reply.

[MrsH17]

Sorry to hear your news. I had mine today too hun. I know exactly how you feel. It’s not like when you are both fertile and you can just try again next month.

I am actually fine to conceive my husband has a low sperm count but I don’t feel mad at him in the slightest that it didn’t work and you shouldn’t feel bad either.

I understand you feel loss at the moment but there is still a chance it will work for you in the future. Don’t give up. Your already doing what you can by working hard.

Message me anytime time you like if you need someone to talk too. Non IVFers don’t always understand what it is like to go through.

If you feel you need more support use the clinics counselling service.

Xxx

[GELL18 in reply to MrsH17]

You are right non ivfer never understand this process at all... I have said to myself I will be firm with people this time round, any inappropriate suggestions I will not entertain...

Unless you have walked this road it's hard to understand...

Iam sorry for you too... and yes we have hope... i will not give up... will pick myself up and start fighting this fight again until we win.

And thank you for being so understanding to your partner... its always hard but if they is no pressure from the other spouse it makes the walk so much easier.....

I will definitely be in touch if I need help.. I said I will give myself 3 to 4 months ri raise money and prep my body...

Giving up is not an option although it's hard and most people just think you are wasting money...

[MrsH17 in reply to GELL18]

You still have the fighting spirit ... if I try again it will be in a few months so we can do this again together 😘

Try to have some you time for now and get yourself happy and in a good place to start again

Lots of love xxx

[Lots8788]

I'm so sorry lovely. BFNs are so shit! With ours I stopped the meds on Sunday and it came on the Monday. You've so got this, and when you're ready to you can think about next steps. And you're definitely not the weakest link. lots of love and hugs to you xx

[GELL18 in reply to Lots8788]

Thank you lots... I have had a difficult few days been emotional and busy at work which helped..

It is all too heart breaking but all we can do is pick oneself up...

[Core]

So sorry to hear this, please don’t see yourself as a failure although easier said than done as I know I have apologised to my husband for a fail which he’s told me off for! My period usually comes about 2 days after stopping meds xx

[GELL18 in reply to Core]

Thank you Core my periods didnt worst any time.. by the next day it had started which made it all emotional so the next few days were emotional...

Allowing myself to cry when I need to but also just focusing on the next step.

Thank you for the love and checking up on me...

[Tugsgirl]

I’m sorry. Bfns are really hard xx

[emmab178]

So sorry to hear of the bfn. Shitty news. Take it easy on yourself. At least you gave it a shot. Some don't have enough courage to even take that step x

[GELL18 in reply to emmab178]

That's so true Emma I have tried to list all the positives and focus on them and next step...

And improving things for next time