OTD 13pt5dt BFN

[Prayingforafamily]

So as the title says I got my BFN this morning after transferring 2 top blasts. We are devastated. It has been our 2nd transfer and 1st FET. These were the best we had and I just feel I’ve let my husband down. It took us months to get here after cancelled FET after FET due to my crappy lining. Finally got to 7mm which is the best I think we were ever going to get. I don’t know how I’ll move on from this. I’m 41 and think I need to come to terms with not having children.

[Jessy1280]

Im so, so sorry to hear this. Do you have any frozen left? It's nothing you've done wrong. It takes on average 2.7 cycles according to the NHS. I don't know if it made a difference but I had Endo scratch this time. I know they say it's not proven but it worked for me. Sending all the hugs in the works. Seriously gutted for you xxx 🤗

[Prayingforafamily in reply to Jessy1280]

Thankyou. We are lucky enough to have 2 frozen embryos but they are not great gradings. X

[Livinginhope2019]

I’m so sorry to hear this. Please know you haven’t let your husband down at all, it’s just a crappy journey at times and it really does test us. Sending you the biggest hug xxx

[Lots8788]

So sorry to hear that. Its nothing you have done or not done and isn't your fault. Hope you have lots of support around you and we are here too. lots of love and hugs x x

[recidwen]

I know that despair and feeling of worthlessness. I am so sorry you are going through this. Try to be kind to yourself. Xxxxx

[Yellow611]

I am so sorry to hear this news and I am sure your husband would not want you to feel guilty, because he knows it's not your fault. It's such great disappointment for you both, you need to hug each other through it. You have the other two to try, even if they are not the best. Be kind to yourself and take care xxx

[Italy300618]

I'm so sorry to hear this, after your journey to get where you are, it's just devastating. Its definitely nothing you've done, after reading so many on here it all seems a lot of it is down to luck, even though the embryos you have left may not be top grades they are still your hope of a family, cling onto that my lovely. Now take some time for you both, and take care of yourself xx

[Snez84]

There is nothing worse than a negative, it’s heartbreaking. I know it’s hard not to blame yourself but this process is totally out of our control (as you know) and you couldn’t have done anything more. Please be kind to yourself.

I know it won’t be much consolation but our 4aa blastocyst totally failed to implant, I miscarried our 4ab and our ‘worst’ quality 3bc embryo became our miracle baby. The two frozen embryos you have could also be your miracles. You must remember that if they’ve been frozen then they are of a good enough quality to be successful xx

[Cinderella5]

Awww Im so very sorry, I had really hoped you would get that magic BFP! Sending love and hugs.xx

[Prayingforafamily]

Thanks everyone. I called the clinic who have advised me to stay in meds and test again Friday as I haven’t bled but I think they are just being cautious as it as 13pt on a 5day extended blast x I think I just need time to wallow in self pity for a few days and think about if I am strong enough to try another FET. I’ve been reassured that the gradings of embryos are not a sure fire way of them being viable but surely if the 2 top grade extended blasts didn’t make it these won’t 🤷🏻‍♀️. I dunno it’s such a head mess

[Tiddly1984 in reply to Prayingforafamily]

Hi, so sorry this wasn’t better news. Don’t write off your remaining embryos though, as many a time the lesser graded embryos have been what have yielded better results for some women. I don’t think we altogether know why some embryos stick and others don’t, so remain hopeful...x

[Lorita1984]

Im so sorry..... I know how you feel❤️❤️❤️❤️ making desisions on our plan forward helped me a lot. I send you hugs dear xxxxxxxxxxx

[Prayingforafamily in reply to Lorita1984]

Thankyou. Glad to read you have a plan set for the new year and wish you all the best. I have thought about a fresh cycle but I’m 41 with low AMH so not sure it’s a valid option xx

[Stephybivf]

I’m absolutely gutted for you. I’m so so sorry to hear that, I was really hoping everything would work out. Please don’t feel like you’ve let hubby down, I’m absolutely sure he doesn’t think that at all. Thinking of you 💔💔💔

[Prayingforafamily in reply to Stephybivf]

Thankyou x

[Core]

So so sorry to read this, you haven’t let your husband down and I’m sure he doesn’t think this. Look after each other and plan something lovely to do together just you two xx