It’s all over ...2 cycles and 3 loss 😢 - Fertility Network UK

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It’s all over ...2 cycles and 3 loss 😢

Olivia1980xxx profile image
9 Replies

2day is my OTD and is BFN 😔

After unsuccessful cycle this feb after few months when I finally “pick up” the pieces we went through natural frozen cycle.

I ovulate my lining was perfect for transfer and I had my two top embryos put back in ...one from the cycle I had my baby and one from the last one...

Those long 12 days felt really positive...

After couple days I start having this sense of strong smell that anything was so irritating exactly like I had with my baby ...I had back pain and pulling sense on left side and on and of like period pain.

All those was good signs...till the Saturday evening when I come back home and I sow some spotting of blood....

Sunday morning was more and more which eventually start looking like period.

Yesterday I called the clinic telling them about it and they said to still do the test 2morrow (2day) and call them to tell the the outcome and we will discuss it .

I cannot pick up the pieces I cry and I don’t have any tears left ...😔

I had two cycles and I lost 3 embryos...now I being left with only two grade C in freeze.

My hubby didn’t say anything and me ...I cannot even find the words ...

What wrong with me ...?????????

What went wrong ?????!??

Why my body is not taking my “babies “and keep them where they belong ???????

I’m 39 my AMH level last time was 5.7 , I ovulate I have regular period , I don’t have issues with my lining, all my blood test r good ...I had my baby girl from my second cycle all healthy and had a good pregnancy .

I know ivf is 50/50 chances to work ....and I know there could be different reasons for not working but this time I feel worse knowing that the embryo we had put back in from the cycle I had my baby and didn’t implant....why ????😔😔😔😢😢😢😢xx

The worst thing is that my younger sister which I haven’t spoke with from over a year because I didn’t approval her relationship had a baby boy which I find out thru Instagram...day after my transfer....😔 xx

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Olivia1980xxx profile image
Olivia1980xxx
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9 Replies

I am so sorry to hear things have not worked out. That feeling you get when you see the negative, after everything you have went through, really is horrible.

My first cycle in may also failed. Like yourself, I have questioned why, as everything was the best it could be? It's such a volatile thing to go through, to then not know a reason why? Just keep moving forward and try to stay positive. I am seen posts regarding egg grades, and girls have had success with all kinds. Not just top quality x

SunnyDream profile image
SunnyDream

Hi Olivia1980, I am sorry to hear that(((( It is so unfair when others can have children and you are not, especially without any obvious reasons. I understand you, hun. I got my bfp after ICSI and frozen transfer with only one embryo. I miscarried but still, it was... I wanted to IVF but dr suggested my have ICSI instead s it is more effective and outcomes are better than after IVF. I wish you be strong and do not lose your hope! Consider this as one more step to your happy future! Warmest vibes and hugs to you, dear!

JadeH92 profile image
JadeH92

I am so sorry to be reading this. I have no words of advice as I am on my first round. However, I just want you to know I am thinking about you and your husband and I wish you all the luck in the world for whatever you decide in the future! Take care of yourself and don't be hard on yourself! ❤

Bistbee profile image
Bistbee

I’m so sorry to read your post, it’s just heartbreaking and the eternal question of ‘why’ that no one can seem to answer is enough to send you crazy. It’s impossible not to compare against friends and family who seek to have it so easy, the sense of injustice is real and can eat you up inside. Take all the time you need to start the healing process, be kind to yourself and know this community always has your back. Sending lots of ❤️

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405

Aw no im so truly sorry. But hear me when I say, you did nothing wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you!!

This journey is cruel but you are strong. Take time out to look after yourself. Sending you love xox

Lots8788 profile image
Lots8788

So sorry to hear it didn't work out this time Olivia x big hugs to you and sending lots of love x

Hope76 profile image
Hope76

Oh Olivia am so very sorry, have only just read this sad news. This will be so tough but please take comfort in fact you have 2 left. You are similar to my case as I am also desperately trying to have a sibling for my precious son. At 43 my time is running out we have done a double & if this doesn’t work we have nothing in the freezer .....

Please take time to get over this and you never know your second baby could be that grade C in the freezer.....sometimes it is not always top grade that makes it x

Olivia1980xxx profile image
Olivia1980xxx in reply to Hope76

Thank u hun is heartbreaking for us 😔

I call the clinic yesterday to tell the result...😔

My doctor is away till the end of this month so we will see her in September to discuss this last cycle and see what other tests maybe can be done ...I don’t know ...

My hubby didn’t say anything ...I think was enough seeing me crying and I know he is devastated too but is trying not to show.

Hun I really wish u BFP🙏

Both having a baby’s and being similar age and trying for them siblings will give me strength and hope will happen to me next time.xx

everhopeful83 profile image
everhopeful83

Olivia I’m so so sorry to read this😞 Sending you strength & hugs❤️❤️

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