Struggling tonight

[kitscat]

Hi all, I’m really struggling this evening. I’m sorry for the sad post.

I have a babies first birthday to go tomorrow and I’ve been in tears all evening. It’s just a desperate deep pain I have for a child and I don’t know if I can cope tomorrow. There will be so many children there and I’m going on my own as my husband is working. I’ve tried talking to him tonight but he is just telling me to pull myself together.

Please help. Xxx

[Hidden]

If all going to the birthday party will achieve is that it makes you miserable then don't go and you have my permission not to go as its not worth getting yourself this upset over.

Ring them up and apologise and make up a stomach bug as they won't want you there with one of those!

[kitscat in reply to Hidden]

Yes thank you, I think I will say a stomach bug. No one wants all their children having that. 😁 x

[mushy19]

Make an excuse why u can’t make it and pop in with a gift 🎁 when you feel up to it. As a adult guest it’s not like the party is depending on you to make up the numbers or the child will notice your missing. Put yourself first on this occasion x

[kitscat in reply to mushy19]

Yes thank you. I agree. I think I just need to look after myself. X

[Redpixie]

As the others have said, don’t go. It isn’t worth it. I now give excuses for all parties with too many children, christenings and baby showers right from the off set coz I know how triggering it will be.

[kitscat in reply to Redpixie]

The only problem is that this is my nieces first birthday. They haves no idea about our struggles but must suspect. My mum knows but is fairly insensitive to it she says “ I don’t understand why you have a problem as I didn’t.” It’s a tricky situation. I went to my other nieces party last year a few months after my ectopic and cried for 3 days afterwards.

My husband says it’s not if we have a baby but when so we need to remain positive. It is so so hard. Thank you for all your messages. Maybe I need to man up! Xxx

[mimisquiz77]

Hi, if I may say, I think you shouldn’t go as it is too upsetting. It’s not worthy. Tell the baby parents you can’t make it and treat yourself to something nice. You can bring a present at a later date. When it will feel right for you. I am sure they will understand. and baby will not notice your absence. Hopefully, your mummy time will come soon. Take care xx