Dilemma, 1 Vs 2 Embryos with only 2 f... - Fertility Network UK

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Dilemma, 1 Vs 2 Embryos with only 2 frosties left

63 Replies

I've finally heard back from my clinic and have my FET booked in for 1st March so not long too wait.

I raised my query with Consultant about my Anaphylaxis/Allergic reaction night before my transfer and he said it could potentially have played a part so next time he has upped my aspirin dose and Prednisone dose and also added Clexane to the other usual meds. He said if next cycle fails then he would do uterine and immune tests.

The last 2 cycles I have only had 1 embryo put in but he has suggested we do the 2 because he said due to long history of failed attempts (1 ended in MMC and 1 BFN) and they are not too grade,both B's but I'm really cautious because I only have 2 remaining and I don't think 2 failed attempts is classed as a long history and I'm convinced last time failed due to allergic reaction. I'm worried that if I have 2 if 1 is weaker then it could impact in the success of the second one, don't know if I can cope losing my last 2.

Any advice or similar experience would be greatly received xx

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63 Replies

I have always had two back. It has always been my been my clinics preference and we were happy with that. Good luck xx

in reply to

Thankyou for your reply, I've just read back on a couple of your posts and sounds like you were in a similar position to me in terms of failed cycles,age and DE xx

in reply to

Congrats btw 😃 and good luck to you too xx

in reply to

Good luck to you too xxx

in reply to

Sorry it's me again. Do you mind if I ask if you went with the Intralipids, I'm seriously considering it xx

in reply to

Hi no I didn’t. For second transfer I had prednisalone that was my bfn. First two were abroad. Third in Uk. Showed them results and they said no need for extra meds in fact they did say some reports say it can do more harm than good.

It’s a very difficult journey and very conflicted in lots of ways. Hope that helps xx

in reply to

That is really interesting,thankyou for responding. It is really confusing xx

in reply to

Its more than confusing lol. I take the view if it’s goung to work it will regardless. Our last transfer I nearly never went, thought there was no point. Only a few eggs made it and when they suggested a day three transfer I thought there was no hope! Went only to tick the boxes and get our last transfer done. Both made it although we lost one at 6 weeks. Strange how it works xxx

in reply to

So sorry to hear about your loss at 6 weeks that must have been really difficult. It is really strange how it works but best of luck to you for a happy and healthy pregnancy xxx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55

I have failed 2 transfer with single embryo so next time we will put 2 back. I’m quite apprehensive about it but I know that I need to try something different. The consultant said that double transfer increase chance of pregnancy by 15%. I understand you are worried about it as you have 2 left so it’s a bit tricky.

My consultant said that embryos don’t impact one another in terms of implantation despite the fact that one study suggested something different. He said that each couple tells him about this but it’s completely untrue. But of course twin pregnancy is higher risk for them and the mother. I probably didn’t help you to make a decision but I guess you need to listen to your intuition. Xx

in reply toKari55

It's really difficult when you read conflicting advice from Consultants,mine said increases by about 10% and they wouldn't usually transfer 2, only in the case of repeated failed attempts.

Do you have your next transfer booked? Xx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

Yes, I know what you mean. I think my consultant did say 10-15% actually. He also said that 50% of the women who had double embryo transfer and got pregnant will have multiples. I think I would be shocked if 2 implanted since I’ve never managed to get pregnant so far. My clinic also advises putting 2 in the case of repeated implantation failure so I guess I’m now falling into this category.

My period should arrive next week and will use that cycle as a preparatory month as they require me to take Norethisterone so I think the main FET will start around 10-15 Feb. I’m leaning towards trying the steroid this time and the consultant will prescribe 10mg a day for me. I must say I’m a bit of a scaredy person and feeling very uncomfortable with all those difficult decisions that we have to make.

When will you be starting your FET? Xx

in reply toKari55

I know what you mean I keep thinking what are the chances of 2 implanting but you never know!! I had steroid last time and they have upped the dosage this time due to my allergies, a lot of ladies on here have also been prescribed steroids.

It's just so hard isn't it not knowing if you are making the right decision or not but we can only do what we feel is best at the time. My FET is booked in for 1st March, will do my depo shot on 1st day of my next period and start meds on 9th Feb.

Definitely keep in touch xx

MofM profile image
MofM

I would put back one, due the fact that, if both implant and thrive, a twin pregnancy has a much higher risk.

in reply toMofM

I would be worried about that, twins are lovely, I have 1 year old twin nieces but I think I would feel even more anxious!

I transferred 2 the time before last. I got a bfp (my first ever) but sadly it ended in an anembryonic pregnancy.

I then looked into it further before my last transfer. I too read that if you transfer two, at any point one can impact on the other either earlier on or also later on something could happen and you may have to make a heartbreaking decision. Also, if two does work then there is a much greater risk to you. So on balance I decided to put one back and to focus all my energy and nutrients onto that one. I am now 14.5weeks.

But, it is totally up to you. Xx

in reply to

Hey Camillage, I can't believe you are 14.5 weeks,how are you feeling? Is it feeling more real? I think my gut is telling me to go for 1, it makes me feel more anxious having the 2. I felt a bit deflated after my correspondence with the Consultant, he said that unfortunately if 1st cycle doesn't work then unfortunately the chances of success in next cycle decreases,really hope we don't have to start again.

What did they do differently in your last cycle? Xx

in reply to

3 x cycles own eggs, 3 eggs 1 fertilised bfn, 2 eggs both fertilised both transferred bfn, 3rd cycle abandoned.

Moved to donor eggs.

Cycle 1 = bfn x 1 egg

Cycle 2 = less stress, bfp but anembryonic x 2 eggs

Cycle 3 = bfp added baby aspirin, much less stress x 1 egg

That's all. My clinic told me that chances increase each time with donor eggs - 50% first time, 75% second etc. It makes sense when you think that for "normal" life we are only 1 in 3 likely to get pregnant each month. Maybe they just said that to me?

Still feel like a fraud. But I have a belly like before I dieted. I am sure that there must be something there as there definitely was on the scans.... I keep thinking I will believe it more at the next scan. Maybe self preservation in case something goes wrong.

I really hope you are able to decide and this time is your time. Xx

in reply to

Thankyou for responding with details of your cycles, I know it's hard when you get a BFP but for one reason or another it doesn't develop.

I can understand bthe self preservation and hopefully after next scan you can start to enjoy it. When you is your next scan? Do you want to find out the gender or are you keeping it as a suprise?

I think in my gut I know that I want to go with 1 just needed to get some views and do bit more research xx

in reply to

I don't mind sharing at all. That is why we are all here after all.

After the 12 week scan the next one is 20. We don't want to find out the sex. We would like at least one surprise in this 🤣

Xxx

in reply to

I don't blame you for wanting a surprise,I would do the same.

You'll have to make sure you post the scan pic for us to see xxx

in reply to

I am just not sure what will upset people and what will help people. I wasn't planning on posting any pictures xx

in reply to

It is a difficult one, personally it gives me hope but maybe not everyone shares that opinion xx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

Camillage, can I ask what you did to reduce stress? X

in reply toKari55

First of all I actually took a couple of months off work. Luckily we were able to do that and my work were very supportive. Whilst off I took time to heal from the latest bfn, went to counselling, joined a choir, and learned to stop being so hard on myself. My husband and I did a mindfulness course and that was so helpful. When I went back to work I started doing a different job with none of the stress I previously had.

I also went to kineseology which is like counselling for the body. It was amazing.

Xx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

Thank you! The job is definitely a big problem for me and I have 1,5h commute on top of it. Unfortunately I’m not able to take time off as need to fund the IVF.

Could you tell me a little about kinesiology? What a typical session looks like? Xx

in reply toKari55

I now also mostly work from home which saves the commute.

Kineseology is described here:

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kin...

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

Thank you, this looks interesting. I will investigate. I hope your pregnancy is going well xx

in reply toKari55

I have the same problem as you Kari,although my Managers have been very supportive it's a very busy period for us,although I work from home most of the time I'm working on multiple projects so can get stressful at times but I've spoken to my Manager and said that I will let him know if it gets to much as I need to manage my stress over next few weeks, are you able to speak to your Manager? Do you travel by car or train? Maybe you could try mindfulness during your commute to use as your relaxation time? Xx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

Morning Clairenix! Oh I’m also working on multiple projects! I find it really stressful but to be honest my managers expect me to juggle everything. They keep saying they are supportive and to be honest they were always ok with all the appointments etc. I have also worked from home for a week after last transfer and one week I was on leave and they were fine with that. However, a few months ago I have asked if I could work from home 1 day a week on regular basis and my boss said that we would need to go through HR to get it approved and he discouraged me from doing it. I work from home on ad hoc basis but to be honest after 10 years of commuting to central London I’m struggling as I have no life during the week, I’m just working. I use train now and walk for 20 min, which is better to what I used to do - train+tube. I’m meditating on a train as I’m lucky to still get a seat and read a lot, but by end of the day I’m knackered. I wonder sometimes if this hinders my chances to get pregnant 🤷🏻‍♀️ xx

in reply toKari55

It is a really tough one isn't it and it is difficult when you are having to finance IVF,even more pressure. Could you have an off the record conversation with HR to explain your situation and does your company have an IVF policy.

I made my HR Director aware that I've had failed attempts and a miscarriage to cover myself if I have to say no to certain projects due to stress, I'm going to play things by ear next few weeks xx

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

My company is really flexible with young mothers but unfortunately there is no policy to support women during the IVF treatment. I approached the HR about this last summer and even got in touch with Fertility Network who wanted to come to our offices and help them to set up a fertility policy but so far they haven’t done anything about it. I’m going to have to have a think on what to do next.

Have you decided how many you will put in yet? X

in reply toKari55

That is really rubbish 😔

I have read various articles which say stress of IVF and general stress doesn't impact the outcome but I feel the same as you. I do find mindfulness helps but work can be over whelming when going through this journey.

I haven't, going to out some time aside this weekend to look into it more, I can't think properly in the week,too much work related stuff going through my head!! X

Kari55 profile image
Kari55 in reply to

I love mindfulness too, it’s a life saver.

Have a lovely weekend and good luck with the decision making. X

in reply toKari55

Thankyou,hope your having a lovely relaxing weekend xx

MissSaoPaulo profile image
MissSaoPaulo

I'd go with your gut feeling hon. There's no way to know which is better, so many unknowns to try and balance... impossible. So go with what you feel most comfortable with. Good luck xxx

in reply toMissSaoPaulo

Thankyou MissSaoPaulo,I think my gut is telling me to go with the 1,I'm feeling even more nervous than last time!!

How are you getting on? Xxx

MissSaoPaulo profile image
MissSaoPaulo in reply to

Best of luck!!!!

I'm really well thanks xxx

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B

Personally i would put back 1. If your embryos made it to blast than they are good embryos. Like you I have 2 frosties left both rated BB. I actually have no choice as my clinic will only put back 1 as my round is publicly funded (or NHS as you would say) and they do ot want to risk twins for health reasons. but I think even if I had the choice I would put 1 back. I look at it as I now have 2 attempts at getting pregnant. My clinic has actually said it does not increase your chances having 2 put back and they do believe if 1 embryo is abnormal it could affect the other one. And I also think if there is something not right in our womb or lining I'd rather lose 1 embryo instead of 2. Plus the risk of twins is not good especially at my age. But anyhow it's your decision and I wish you the very best of luck xxxx

in reply toNiki_B

Hi Nikib,welcome back 😃

That's the way I've been looking at it, 2 more chances left and although I wouldnt moan if I was pregnant with twins and would feel blessed I think it would be difficult going back to work full time and approaching 42 I would be worried about the risks.

When are you having your transfer? Xx

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to

Yep I definatley like the sound of 2 more transfers, and while yes I would love twins but I know how risky it is, especially being older at 38. Have you made a decision yet?

Well I was suppose to have transfer this month but my period went AWOL last month was due 15th December yet it only arrived 2 days ago! Also it's been really nice having a break from IVF for once the last year was full of 2 failed rounds of IVF was so taxing emotionally. Plus its summer in New Zealand so been enjoying the beach, drinks and bbqs! Haha. So decided to wait until Feb Just so my body is back on track. I've got 2 day 6 embies frozen so chances are a little lower than 5 day blasts but was given a 30% chance with each so 30 is better than 0! Plus I keep telling g myself if they made it freeze and stuck it out 6 days in the lab they must be tough little buggers! 😁😉🤞xxx

in reply toNiki_B

I haven't decided 100% yet but I am more towards the 1 but can't take take some time the weekend to do more research and read through all your comments again, I have a few days before transfer to decide.

Isn't that typical re.period but your looking at it the right way, bbqs,beach and drinks sounds like heaven,you enjoy while you can hun,it's b****y cold here, although mild for this time of year. I know what you mean about the emotional side,it can be so tiring and takes a lot of strength to keep picking yourself back up but we are warriors 😃 and your frosties are tough cookies, keep in touch and let me know how you get on xxx

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to

That's a good idea, I think only you can decide what you want to so, and it will be the right choice 😊

And yes the summer has been amazing! Wish it could last all year lol. Well yes we must be warriors to keep putting ourselves through this but fingers crossed is worth it! 🤞🤞 and yes will definately keep ya updated 😁 when is your transfer booked for? Xxx

in reply toNiki_B

I'm booked in for the 1st March so going to fly out on the 28th and fly back on the 3rd xx

Anya80 profile image
Anya80

That’s very personal decision and lots should be taken into it to consider how many to put back: your age, stage of embryo (blastocyst or 2-3day embryo, fresh or FET cycle etc) to be ready for twin pregnancy etc.

I can only speak from own experience. My second attempt fresh ivf gave us beautiful son (one blastocyst transfer grade 5AB) I was 34 at that time and my clinic did not advised to put back two which we also agreed .

From that cycle we had 6 very good blastocysts frozen. My first FET was carried 3yrs later, again one 4AB blastocyst put back it was BFP but miscarried at 7+1wks! Second FET attempt put back again single 4AB blast and this cycle was bfn! My doctors told me that their clinic had slightly lesser success rates with FET transfers and after I’ve done further research myself we both came to opinion that I must be better responding on fresh cycles! My clinic never told me what two do it was entirely our decision how many to put back in FET transfers, but I think their policies is not to put back two under age of 35!

Having still few very good blastocyst in freezer(and having no option for fresh ivf anymore) we give it a go with third FET but this time opted for two blastocyst transfer -it was 4AB(-) & 3ab. I also had mock/monitored transfer done before and I think this added to it success too as I’m now almost 9wks pregnant with single baby(second sack detected but no heartbeat).

I would say that if you transfer two embryos be prepared for having two babies! Also listen yourself if you feel one is better to transfer do so, I remember that before our second FET we declared to put back 2but pulled this off last minute and went for one as at that time was not prepared for twin pregnancy! Do what your heart is saying and what you are able to cope with. Good luck xxx

in reply toAnya80

Thankyou Anya,firstly congratulations but also sorry to hear that there was no heartbeat in the second sac that must have been difficult.

I'm 41, approaching 42 and they are 5 days both Grade B, my last cycle was Grade A. How long before did you have the mock transfer? My clinic is abroad so difficult to keep flying over.

I think my gut is telling me to go for the 1, although I would love 2 children I think I would find it difficult with twins.

Wishing you the very best for a happy and healthy pregnancy xx

Anya80 profile image
Anya80 in reply to

The mock was done the same day of the transfer in fact just shortly before the real transfer;) I think this helped a lot !

in reply toAnya80

Are there any specific reasons why they suggest a mock transfer,only asking because my last 2 attempts the transfer bit has gone to plan so just wandering what they check for with a mock,eg. shape of the uterus. I will look into it and see if it's worth me asking the question

Anya80 profile image
Anya80 in reply to

Apparently with my clinic they do not offer monitored transfers every single attempts but they try different technics (as I’ve been told) but I think they might not have enough equipment available hence not always available. It was my third attempt and I guess they also wished it’d be successful so they’ve used all available technics to increase success. There was no particular issue with me or my uterus or anything else really. Seems this helped me!

in reply toAnya80

It's definitely worth me reading up on it then thankyou. Have a lovely weekend Xx

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

I only ever had 1 put back. When I had 2 Frosties left they tried to convince me to put 2 back due to one of them being a day 6 and therefore having a slightly higher chance of not defrosting. But I knew I didn’t want twins so stuck to my guns and said no, I only wanted 1. The first one failed but then on my next round the second one (the day 6 one) stuck and I got my BFP. I don’t know whether it would have stuck if I’d transferred it the previous round with the one that failed but I’m now glad I didn’t risk it. On the other hand, my cousin had 2 failed rounds with 1 transferred and then on the round that she had 2 transferred she got twins and she swears that they needed each other to survive. I think what I’m trying to say is that there is no right or wrong and you have to do what you think is right for you. Good luck with whatever you decide.

in reply toLynnr54

Thankyou for your response, to be honest I don't think I could cope with twins although ideally I always wanting 2 children but at my age in with situation as it is will be blessed to have 1.

Congrats on your BFP, your little one definitely a fighter X

Thankyou for you good luck wishes xx

Hi,

We are just starting a FET and have 3 frozen embryos. They are graded B, C, C. Our first fresh transfer was of a single grade A embryo which split resulting in twins. Sadly I miscarried at 9 weeks in November. Had I had 2 transferred we could potentially have been expecting triplets! My consultant is not aware of any statistics whether this is more likely to happen to us again or whether it was just a chance event and as likely to happen to anybody. For this reason we will be going for a single transfer this time. Hopefully if the grade B if it thaws well. I was tempted to ask for both C’s the following time, or if the B does not survive (mainly because I worry about preparing for a FET with only one frozen embryo that might not survive the thaw) if this one fails or if the first embryo does not survive but some of the responses here have made me think and now I’m really not sure! Good luck with your cycle and I hope you get your BFP whatever you decide xx

in reply to

Hi Aprilmana,thankyou for your response and so sorry to hear about your miscarriage,it really is heart breaking.

It's such a tough decision to make isn't it,our last frosties are so precious. When are you planning your next transfer? Xx

in reply to

Hi, I’ve just started my down regulation so if all goes to plan transfer will be in 4-5 weeks (totally expecting something to go wrong before then!). I will get a chance to discuss with the embryologist a few days before transfer and I think I will go with their recommendation which will likely be a single transfer given our history and my age (34). Have you discussed your concerns with your clinic? Now to pray that they thaw well! Xx

in reply to

Not long to go then,how are you feeling? Really hope it goes smoothly for you.

I've only had email contact with my Consultant,I told him I was concerned and he said that in my case who would go with the 2 but that's it's my decision xx

in reply to

Thank you, a little excited, mainly terrified of what could go wrong and struggling to get my head around how a lower grade embryo could have a better outcome. But I am going in trying to have the attitude of what will be will be. I hope yours goes smoothly too and whichever decision you come to will be the right one for you, hopefully this will be the year for us both xx

sandra81 profile image
sandra81

First time I put back 3 and got a BFN. Second time I put back three and got pregnant with twins. So many risks it was a difficult pregnancy and got preenclampsia as well. I would not do anything differently but if I had l known everything I know now about how hard and risky a multiples preg is I would hv had second thots about putting back 3.

in reply tosandra81

Hi Sandra,thankyou for coming back to me,I've just read you last post and it sounds like you had a really difficult time. How are your girls doing now and how are you finding having two little ones?

Gor123 profile image
Gor123

Ive always had 2 put back it gives you that extra chance. X

in reply toGor123

Thankyou for coming back to me,I'm just nervous because I only have 2 left x

ChristineB05 profile image
ChristineB05

Hi lovely I'm in a similar position. I've had 2 failed IUIs and 2 failed IVF cycles, 1st cycle resulted in a BFP but I miscarried at 7 weeks and second BFN.

I have two frozen embryos and having only transferred 1 embryo previously, I'm almost certain I will have two transferred for my next FET in March.

But it all depends on your circumstances. Not an easy decision but go with your gut. All the best xx

in reply toChristineB05

Hi Christine,thankyou for your response,I'm really sorry that you've had to go through failed cycles and a miscarriage, its really tough.

My gut has been telling me to have 1 put back,my Consultant given me extra meds this time and I'm having an intralipid injection so will see if that helps.

What date is your FET in March? Xx

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