Confused sudden loss of interest in s... - Fertility Network UK

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Confused sudden loss of interest in sex since ivf refferal

Lyn84 profile image
7 Replies

The last month since i found out we had been refered for ivf i have completely lost interest in sex i didnt think much of it at first but now im starting to wonder why as before we started trying for a baby we always have a good sex life even if i was exhausted i could still get in the mood but now i keep turning down my partners advances and im not even frustrated despite how long it has been has anyone else experienced this while going through all this?

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Lyn84
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7 Replies

I also felt like this Hun. I've always had quite a high sex drive & used to get the hump big time if my husband wasn't in the mood. I think I was just so desperate to get pregnant that it was constantly on my mind to try. We went to our IVF clinic at the start of January then started IVF in March & I can count on one hand the number of times we had sex in those weeks in between. I really don't know what changed but something definitely did! X

Lyn84 profile image
Lyn84 in reply to

Thank you so much for your reply as i was starting to worry as i dont want things to carry on like this for too long but it makes me feel better that im not the only one thats felt like this

in reply to Lyn84

Your definitely not the only one. I didn't understand why I was feeling how I was but I guess I was probably seeing finally having IVF as admitting defeat & it made me feel so unsexy. Good luck with your treatment, wishing you a happy ending. X

It's natural i think. Obviously as humans we have sex for pleasure but the real core animal instinct is for procreation. If procreation is taken out of your hands then it is only natural for interest to wane. Also, our hormones are all over the place so that could be a contributing factor. Whilst we can all giggle about it, it actually might be good to mention it to your medical professionals as they might look at hormones to determine if that is impacting on your success.

Hope that wasn't too sciency! Xx

TRYING2016 profile image
TRYING2016

Hello i felt exactly the same, before we needed ivf it felt like we had to try and was always in the mood and once I realised we needed ivf i just gave up thinking whats the point trying naturally and was always thinking it wont happen. It can happen naturally and it has happened to women here naturally so dont lose hope wishing you all the best xxxx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Sounds natural to me. I expect that sex has been a bit of a chore while ttc, the passion and excitement can go right out the window so now you know the pressure of ttc is off due to the ivf you don’t feel the need to bother with it at the moment. Give it some time. Concentrate on being intimate without the pressure of actually having sex. Just enjoy each other, without the pressure, for a while and see what happens xx

Yep, totally natural. It all takes its toll on you mentally and as much as you will feel attracted to someone if you can't engage the brain for desire and allow the sexual cycle to start it just doesn't happen.

Stress, grief and emotions do all sort to our bodies and mental well being.

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself about the sex. Take some time to process the news you have been given and it will pick back up.

All the best to you both.

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